More than you know
by Sinkme
Summary: One shot then extended. Snape reports to an Order meeting and for the first time they realize the gravity of his position as a spy. Set in year 5. Focus on Snape, Sirius, Hermione. Friendship only. AU from end of 4, disregards canon facts of first war. ON HIATUS.
1. Chapter 1

Hey, so this just popped into my head and I had to write it out. It's a one shot for now, but I might be changing that later.

Disclaimer: Not mine

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Severus was late for the Order meeting. That in itself was unusual. No matter what happened, he always arrived on time. Although no one noticed his absence aside from the Headmaster.

The meeting hadn't officially started when the spy entered 12 Grimmauld Place and took his position in the shadows of the room. Dumbledore was glad that so many of his top people in the Order had been able to get here for an impromptu meeting, on a Friday night no less.

As he watched, everyone broke off into small groups discussing something: Lupin and Sirius seemed to be arguing over how much to tell Harry; Moody, Kingsley and Tonks were talking about the recent Death Eater activity; Molly, Arthur and Minerva were discussing the upcoming school year and any security changes that would ensure the school's safety when the students returned on Monday.

Most of the Order members were out on missions, some couldn't be there, but regardless, this was the core of the Order. Dumbledore finally saw Snape and called the room to attention to begin the meeting.

"Let us begin" he said, not drawing attention to the fact that Snape had arrived late. "I think we should begin with a report from Severus so that we may have a better understanding of what we are up against at this time."

Dumbledore sat down as everyone turned to the spy. Moody openly glared at him while Sirius smirked and most of the Order showed various levels of distrust to him.

Snape ignored it. He was more than used to hostility.

"As you are all aware, the Dark Lord-"

"Why do you call him the Dark Lord, Snivellus? Only his followers call him that."

"Sirius" the Headmaster warned him.

Snape continued, unfazed by the interruption, "The Dark Lord is trying to acquire the prophecy that will reveal the connection between himself and Potter. It is in the Department of Mysteries, but only Potter or the Dark Lord can actually retrieve it. Since the Dark Lord is adamant that he not reveal himself unless absolutely necessary, it stands to reason that he will try to lure Potter there."

"What are you saying Snape? Is Harry in danger?" Sirius jumped up and stood opposite the dark wizard.

"No more then he was the day the Dark Lord marked him, and certainly no more then any other year when he wandered off and got into trouble on his own. Far more likely is that those close to him are in danger." Snape was trying to goad Sirius.

"Severus" this time the Headmaster warned him.

Snape inclined his head to Dumbledore and continued his report, "Therefore Potter and his friends need to be guarded at all times. Most likely the Dark Lord will try to lure Potter out either by taking one of his friends-" he spared a glance at the Weasleys "-or planting false images in his head via their connection (1). Headmaster, Potter should be taught Occlumency with all possible haste."

"Yes, he should. I believe you have some free time, don't you Severus?" the Headmaster inquired calmly.

"I absolutely do not. Especially not to teach that ungrateful brat a skill that is beyond his grasp."

"Headmaster, can't you teach him?" Sirius pleaded.

"No, I think Severus should teach him. It will be good for both of them."

Sirius crossed the space that separated him from Snape and grabbed a fistful of robe from his left shoulder, pulling the spy closer.

"You listen well, Snivellus, if I hear that you're being a git to Harry-" Sirius broke off as he felt something wet against his hand. Pushing Snape away Sirius looked down at his hand only to find that it was stained with blood.

He looked at Snape, who looked white against his black robes, and now noticed that his entire left side was shining with blood.

The rest of the members noticed too, and Lupin stood, unconsciously moving closer to the wounded man. "Severus, what happened?"

"Like you care" he spat, furious that his weakness had been discovered, and by Black of all people.

Molly Weasley stood and tried to move towards Snape, but he just backed up to the corner of the room, "Severus, let me help with that."

"No. I have done this on my own up until now and I will continue on my own when you remember that you don't care about your Death Eater spy" He moved to the door, only pausing for a moment to bid a terse farewell to the Headmaster.

Tonks looked to Dumbledore, "How often is he like that?"

"Well, as far as I can remember, he's been rather unpleasant since he came to Hogwarts. As far as I can tell, he has had some degree of injury, mental or physical, after each meeting with Voldemort, and he often reports to Order meetings without having time to tend to those injuries" Dumbledore looked incredibly sad, and his glasses only amplified the emotion that his eyes held.

"Why haven't you done anything? Helped him? Healed him?" Molly demanded, slipping into mother mode.

"He has refused my attempts as well, and I don't have it in me to force him. He is bound by too many masters for me to take away his dignity."

Sirius was too shocked to make a comment. _If he really was a Death Eater, why would he be hurt? Could he really be on our side? No. He's Snivellus, the kid that knew more about the Dark Arts than any seventh year._

Dumbledore looked around and said, "We'll call it a night. Without Severus here there is little point in continuing. We will have another meeting soon. Until then be safe."

Dumbledore departed, using the Floo to return to Hogwarts. Minerva followed soon after, promising to check on Severus in the morning.

The other Order members were left to go their own ways.

Kingsley stood and made his way to the Floo to go to the Ministry, wondering how much longer Snape could hold out until the stress became too much.

Moody followed Kingsley to the Floo, thinking that Snape would always be a Death Eater, but that it might be possible that Snape was atoning for his past mistakes.

Molly and Arthur made their way outside to apparate home, vowing to tell their children to be more careful and to keep an eye on Severus.

Tonks made her way to a bedroom upstairs to catch a few hours of sleep, amazed at what her old Potions Master had kept hidden from everyone, and praying that he would live to see the end of the war.

Lupin and Sirius stayed at the table, reflecting on what just happened and trying to understand the childhood enemy that had grown to silently carry the weight of the wizarding world on his shoulders.

_No one's ever thanked him, let alone trusted him. And yet he keeps going _Lupin realized.

"He's still a git" Sirius said suddenly.

"Whatever you say, Padfoot" Lupin said tiredly, walking up the stairs, thinking that there was still hope for his friend, thanking Severus for the risks he took, and hoping that Tonks was still awake as he made his way upstairs.

Sirius stood at the table, looking back at the hand that was still covered in blood and reflecting on every memory he had of the greasy haired kid he once knew, and the dark and sarcastic man that he barely knew.

Not able to take it anymore, and mentally shrugging off Dumbledore's warning that he shouldn't leave the house, Sirius walked outside and transformed into a shaggy black dog, taking off at a full sprint to clear his head and reevaluate Severus Snape.

I liked how this turned out. I think I would like to continue it, and make it AU. This is obviously during Harry's fifth year, so everything up to the fourth year would be the same. I dunno. For now it's finished. I'll probably come back and add more.

(1)- Just assume that Snape (and everyone else) knows that Voldemort can get to Harry through his scar and that he can send Harry visions that might not be real.

Always,

Sinkme


	2. Chapter 2

YAY! Due to the popular request (from four reviewers) I have decided to continue the story. Not sure where it will go, but I'll keep going.

Flawed Imagination- Thanks and I appreciate that you will keep reading. I hope you like it!

GalynSolo (anon) - Thanks for your review, I'm glad you thought it was powerful. I was trying to get a good grasp on how hard it is for Snape, having to fight two sides.

The Haunting Lady Nightshade- Thanks for your review hope you like it and I hope that you will tell me if you have any ideas for later chapters.

RebeccaRoy- Thanks and I'm glad that you noticed that his pride is dangerous. That's kind of one of the messages I wanted to send. The other obviously deals with old grudges and judging people on false assumptions. Hope you like it!

Disclaimer: It's all JKR's

Chapter 2

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Snape returned to Hogwarts and walked as quickly as he could to the dungeons. Luckily he did not come across any other teachers, so he was able to go right to the dungeons.

He found the portrait of Salazar Slytherin, hidden deep in the dungeons, and gave him the password, collapsing into a chair once he entered his rooms.

He was shaking in anger: at Black, for discovering a weakness of his; at Dumbledore, for suggesting that he teach Potter Occlumency; and at himself, for standing by and doing nothing while the thrice cursed Order members looked at him with pity.

Pity! He neither wanted nor appreciated their feeble attempts to help him. They had never cared about him before, had never noticed when he came injured before, so long as he had some information for them to pick apart.

He stewed for a couple more minutes until a 'pop' alerted him that Winky had entered his chambers.

"Master Snape, did you get yourself hurt again? I just fixed you up from the last time."

Snape sighed, wondering for the millionth time why he had allowed Winky to come to his rooms after the TriWizard tournament fiasco. He had tried to return her to the kitchens, where she belonged, but she had refused to go back and work as a free elf.

He was frustrated and short for time, so he told her to go to his rooms and wait for him. Of course after that Dumbledore told him that he would have to return to the Dark Lord and spy on him.

Snape cursed, remembering that night. He had been lucky to be conscious enough to apparate back to Hogwarts and use a secret entrance through some bushes to get to the dungeons without having to go through the school.

Winky had still been there, of course, and had fetched the potions he demanded, had helped him get to the shower to wash off the blood in order to see what he would try to heal on his own. And had slipped him a sleeping potion when he would have forced himself to report to Dumbledore.

As he slipped into unconsciousness he mumbled, "But I didn't tell you to give me that potion."

And she had answered, with a small smile, "I'm a free Elf now."

Snape had conceded that Winky was useful to have around. As time went on she grew out of her former House Elf persona and took after the Potions Master himself. She was never rude but it was in the way she carried herself, the way she talked to him. There was no doubt that she was a free elf.

He stayed in the chair while Winky brought over a Blood Replenishing Potion, a Pain Relieving Potion, and a general Healing Potion. He took the Pain Relieving Potion first, then the Healing Potion, and finally the Blood Replenishing Potion, and waited for them to take effect.

Nodding his thanks to Winky, he walked to his room, taking off the blood stained robe as he went and casting a quick cleaning charm to keep it from staining. He proceeded to the bathroom and took a hot shower, letting the water ease away the pain and anger.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sirius slowed to a trot. He had no idea where he was, and now that he was thinking clearly he realized that running off might not have been the best idea. He knew, at least, that he had run in a straight line for most of the way, not making any drastic turns, so he turned around to try and find his way back when he heard something that made his dog ears stand and his fur stand on end.

Several pops signaling apparition sounded around him and Sirius took off at a desperate speed, sure that even if they were allies, it was better to be safe and put some distance between them.

"We will get you, cousin. You can only run so fast, and you have no wand."

Sirius increased his speed after he heard his crazy cousin Bellatrix behind him. It was true, though, he was screwed. He had no wand, no means to escape. But that didn't mean he wouldn't try.

Changing back to human, Sirius knew that even if he had no chance, he wouldn't face them as a dog. He would face them as a man.

Those were his last thoughts as a spell hit him from behind and darkness descended on him.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Yea, I know, a cliffie. I want to see how everyone likes this for now, while I have a chance to change it.

Always,

Sinkme


	3. Chapter 3

Flawed Imagination- Thanks for your support

Amanda (anon)- I'm glad you like it!

RebeccaRoy- Sirius isn't the brightest bulb of the bunch, but I love him

Liskaxy- Thanks for your support

ArabellaKye- I'm so happy that you like the story and I promise to try and update faster.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything!!!!!

Chapter 3

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Snape pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. _When did the Order become so useless?_ He thought as he watched half a dozen members run frantically around the house, looking for Sirius.

He's probably hiding somewhere, waiting for me to search so he can catch me unwawares- he snorted, _as if he could. _

Black had been missing for twelve hours, and no one had a clue as to where he was. Lupin had repeatedly told everyone that Sirius was "just standing near the table, looking lost" when he went upstairs to get some sleep.

In the panic, most of the Order members had forgotten their past concerns for their spy, and several of them demanded that he get in contact with some Death Eaters to see if they had gotten Sirius.

He explained for the fifth time, making sure that his frustration was known, "I can't just contact other Death Eaters. We are summoned by the Dark Lord- he alone chooses who comes, and if I contact anyone it will look suspicious. I refuse to blow my cover because that idiot went out for some food!"

That earned him some glares and snide comments, but Snape was too frustrated to care and too familiar with the treatment to notice.

Dumbledore, although infinitely more patient, agreed with him, "We can't risk Severus' position in Voldemort's ranks until we are certain." But Severus heard the real message that Dumbledore was sending- _Sirius might be beyond help. _

The Headmaster had made certain to make it painfully clear to everyone there that under no circumstances was Harry to be told that his godfather was temporarily missing. The last thing they needed was for the Boy-Who-Lived to make some pathetic rescue attempt when they weren't even sure that Sirius was in any immediate danger.

As one, several Order members, Snape among them, grabbed their heads as a shooting pain raced through their brains. Snape was able to lock the pain away first of those affected and turned to Dumbledore, who was unaffected. His eyes shone with comprehension and Snape swore furiously, _how the hell did he manage to get captured?_

After several more minutes the pain stopped and the other Order members looked to Dumbledore. They all knew what it meant, but several of the people in the room had no idea what was going on, so Dumbledore addressed the room in general, "Call off the search" He said sadly. "Sirius has been captured by Voldemort."

Snape turned to look at the other members, particularly Lupin, and then strode to the Floo without a backward glance.

Snape made his way back to Hogwarts, thoughts crashing between being annoyed and being anxious. _He could very well blow my cover. That idiot! Grimmauld Place obviously wasn't stormed, so he must have left the house. And now he's been captured and will probably be killed. Damn it all! I have too much to do to worry about rescuing that mongrel. I could have been researching the Cruciatus potion, I could have been brewing Lupin the Wolfsbane, but no- I had to sit around all day and listen to those fools blather on about that mutt. The students will be here on Monday and I will have only tomorrow to prepare. _

Returning to his classroom he pushed aside his worries and began to create his lesson plans for the next couple of weeks. He figured that he had time now, and he should get it out of the way since he didn't know when he would have time later.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Several days passed before they heard anything definite. The days in between were torture for a select group of Order members who couldn't prepare for the random bursts of mental pain they suffered. Snape gritted his teeth all Sunday as he prepared for a new year of classes despite the stabbing pain.

Monday evening saw the beginning of the school year and Snape was sure that it would turn out to be an awful year. Upon catching sight of the new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher he was tempted to turn around and hide in his dungeons, but he continued dutifully to the Great Hall for the Welcoming Feast and the Sorting.

He arrived in the Great Hall ten minutes before the students were due to arrive and saw to his surprise that all but two of the staff seats were taken, even Sybil had come down for the Feast. Looking at the other Professors he saw that many of them looked guilty and it immediately connected as he sat down next to McGonagall.

He leaned over to her as the new Professor entered the Great Hall, "You know I could move over and make her sit next to both of us, but as I am already accustomed with torture, I will spare you."

McGonagall smiled despite the truth of his statement, "Thank you Severus. I owe you one."

The Professor sat down and turned to Snape, clearly expecting to talk to him. When she began talking, though, the most horribly sweet voice came out, "Hello, you of course already know that I am Dolores Umbridge, Senior Unde-"

Snape held up his hand, "Please Madam. I must beg your indulgence, I have a horrible headache and I've just discovered that sound makes it worse."

He could hear McGonagall snorting next to him and turned to her, pretending to look concerned. In an undertone he said, "You owe me two and I hate you."

Pulling out a vial from his robes, he swallowed its contents in one quick gulp and did not once glance at Umbridge, who looked rather put-out and was glaring occasionally at him. For the next ten minutes, as the carriages carried the students to the school and they made their way into the castle and to their correct tables, the staff sat in tense silence, sneaking glances at the Potions Master and the pink abomination that sat next to him.

Snape sat stock still through the Sorting and the Headmaster's greeting and would have flinched at Umbridge's sudden interruption had he not drilled himself in not showing emotion for years. As it was, he felt Minerva jump a little next to him and imagined her scowl at the nerve of the woman on his left.

Snape watched the students rather than the pink monster in front of him, but he kept a careful ear open as she spoke. As she continued he noticed more and more students tuning her out and bit back a sigh of frustration. Looking at the Professors, he saw that all of them, except Sybil of course, were hanging on her every word.

When she finally finished he saw that only a handful of students seemed to notice and follow the Headmaster's lead in applauding that awful speech. His hands remained firmly clenched in his lap until Minerva nudged him in the side. Reluctantly he brought his hands together and clapped once, then dropped his hands back into his lap.

He heard Minerva snort again but when he turned to look at her he noticed that her hands were in her lap as well and her face was carefully blank.

The first days passed in a haze, as they always do. The students were too concerned with the new Defense teacher to get into too much trouble, and Snape was glad that the first couple of days passed quietly.

It was Friday afternoon, and Snape knew that his last class- Gryffindor and Slytherin, of course- would be as annoying as ever. Potter and Weasley were as inept as ever, but he was pleased to notice that the Granger girl had stopped her infernal hand raising. The class was half way over when Snape felt a searing pain in his left arm.

_He calls me now? _Snape thought frantically. _He's never called me during a class. This is bad. _

Hiding his pain and concern he glanced menacingly to the class. "Having just noticed how spectacularly poor this class is at brewing the set potion, the rest of this class period is cancelled." No one dared breathe. "Instead you will have an essay due tomorrow on the steps, ingredients, and procedure of this potion and your analysis of these things. The essay will be at least fifteen inches long or you will automatically fail that assignment."

When no one moved he said loudly, "Leave!"

They scurried out of their seats, afraid that he might change his mind and either make them finish the potion, or extend the homework.

When he saw the last student leave he locked the door, banished the half finished potions, and fire called Dumbledore to tell him that he had been called.

He walked hurridly through the secret door that led out of his chambers, through the dungeons, and outside to the Forbidden Forest. He pulled out his Death Eater mask and cloak that had been shrunken to fit in his pocket and pulled them on before touching his Mark and allowing the Call to take him.

Before his feet had even hit the ground he was under the Cruciatus Curse.

"Ssseverusss" a high pitched voice said. "You are late."

"I am sorry Master." He pulled himself into a kneeling position, trying to focus on his Occlumency shields to block out recent memories and the pain of the curse.

"I was in a class when you called and it delayed me. It will not happen again."

"Sssee that it doesn't."

Snape nodded, rose, and took his place in the circle on Voldemort's left side.

"Today we have the honor of hosting a dear friend-" Voldemort turned and nodded to Bellatrix, who had a mad smile on her face.

She bowed, left the circle, and returned in minutes with a bloody heap of something.

_Merlin, no! _Snape thought, although his face had fixed itself into its customary sneer. He had learned long ago to fix his face into a mask worthy of any Death Eater, even as his mind denied what he was seeing.

_I'm not prepared for this. I should have seen this coming, it's been almost a week since he was taken, they must gave only switched to torture recently, he looks relatively healthy. _

He surveyed the man in front of him; Sirius' breathing was ragged, there was almost no skin that Snape could see that wasn't covered in blood, but there was still an air of defiance around him. _Bloody Gryffindors! He probably baited them and suffered for it. _

Voldemort turned to Snape, his red eyes calculating. "Well, Sseverus, is this a surprise?"

Snape could truthfully say that he wasn't surprised; he was only surprised that he hadn't been summoned sooner.

"No My Lord. This isn't a surprise at all, at least not an unwelcome one. In truth I expected him to do something stupid and get captured earlier than this. I guess I underestimated his foolish Gryffindor pride since it took him this long" Snape sneered down at the bound man while his mind whirled.

_I need to get him out of here. Potter will do something stupid and try to get Black out. But how? I need time. The potion is still in its experimental state, but it would be perfect if I could get it to work. But can Black hold on until then?_

Voldemort laughed his high pitched laugh and turned to the spy again. "Do they suspect that we have him?"

"My Lord, they suspect, but they dare not talk about it. The werewolf Lupin is devastated but everyone is keeping dear Potter in the dark as to his godfather's current wellbeing."

Sirius growled through his gag, Bellatrix kicked him viciously in the stomach and he doubled over on the ground.

Voldemort turned to the circle and Bellatrix, "Leave us."

Bellatrix looked upset, but seemed to understand that now was not the time to torture her cousin, so she called mockingly as she left, "Have fun with Severus, cousin."

When the last one had left, Voldemort turned to face Snape and his posture and demeanor completely changed.

"Severus, we have not been able to get any information from him and I am getting frustrated."

_I don't think frustrated is the right word for whatever emotion you're feeling. Homicidal maybe. _Snape listened as Voldemort spoke.

"I have been unable to break through whatever spells the old man placed on him and he has not been forthcoming with information." His red eyes swirled with anger. "But I believe that you may be able to get through. You have some skill with Legilimency, correct, Severus?" He paused and looked at the dark man.

"Some, My Lord. Never enough to even hope to match you. Why do you believe I could succeed where you would not?"

Snape asked his question carefully, praying he had not overstepped his bounds. His luck seemed to hold and the snake man answered, "Because the old fool trusts you, thinks you are loyal to him. You, even with your limited Legilimency skills, should be able to get through the Order's barriers around his mind."

Snape knew that he had no choice then. He knelt down by Sirius and raised the man's head, so his eyes would meet his own black ones.

"_Legilimens" _he hissed. He did his best to separate his own mind as well. He retained part of his conciousness and forced his body to show false evidence of the hard time he was having; his brow furrowed, his limbs shook, and a bead of sweat rolled down his face.

He entered Sirius' mind with relative ease. Black's own Occlumency was poor; it was the spells that Dumbledore placed on his mind that had given Voldemort trouble. He looked around, ignoring all of the Orders' secrets that had been locked away by Dumbledore's spell, trying to find Black.

Out of no where a force slammed into Snape. He stood shakily. "Damnit, Black, I'm on your side."

Something slammed into him again and Snape was getting agitated; he had a splitting headache from retaining his own conciousness, and now Sirius was attacking him from inside his mind.

_I just need to wait for him to hit me again, and then I will break the connection and act as if the shields pushed me from his mind. _

The next attack came, as Snape expected, from behind. He allowed its momentum to carry him out of Black's mind and into his own body.

He took a minute to collect himself, he felt the exhaustion start to creep up on him and put it out of his mind for now. He knew what was coming.

"Well?" Voldemort sounded impatient.

_Not good. _Snape knelt in front of the Dark Lord, "My Lord, I have failed you" He didn't have to fake the cringe that accompanied that statement. "Dumbledore must not trust me as much as I had thought- I cannot access any of the Order's secrets." He bowed his head and waited for Voldemort to speak.

"What!" he hissed. "Your only purpose is to have the old fool's trust. What good are you if you are not privy to the Order's secrets?"

It was a rhetorical question and Snape remained silent, his eyes trained on the floor.

Meanwhile, Sirius was looking at Snape, shocked that the spy hadn't shown his true colors.

_He got into my mind. Why is he lying to Voldemort? I don't understand. He isn't really on our side. This is just to gain my trust. I won't be fooled. _

But Sirius' resolve was drained when Voldemort spoke again.

"I think a lesson is in order, Severus. You need to remember what your purpose is. _Crucio._"

Snape twitched and thrashed on the floor, he gave into screams when Voldemort held the curse on him for over a minute.

After two minutes the curse was lifted and Voldemort leaned close to Snape and hissed, "You will get closer to the old man. You will get through the Order's mental barriers. Until then, I want the prisoner healed so that he may last until then."

Voldemort swept past him and Snape lay on the ground for several minutes, still twitching, until he could control the tremors.

Standing shakily he composed himself, raised his wand, and levitated Sirius behind him. "Come, mutt. Let's get you cleaned up."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Wanted to get this out there soon. I have the basic plot for the rest of the story, and a more detailed plot for the end of the fifth year. I will get up to the end of the fifth year posted as soon as I can.

Always,

Sinkme


	4. Chapter 4

Thanks to reviewers:

Flawed Imagination- Hope you like this chapter

ArabellaKye- Thanks for your support

RebeccaRoy- Sirius definitely is in trouble but this will be an important "learning experience" for him

Snapefreak (anon)- Thanks and enjoy the chapter

Laiquendi- I'm glad you like it and I'm glad you like my Snape

Disclaimer: Don't own.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sirius floated silently behind Snape in a manner remarkably similar to the way Sirius himself had levitated Snape out of the Shrieking Shack, although Sirius was at a loss as to how Snape knew that since he was unconscious at the time.

The spy took a series of turns that soon had Sirius lost and confused, although Snape seemed perfectly comfortable in the maze of hallways. Sirius used the time to think, something very many people had said he was incapable of. He shook off the memories of Lily and Remus accusing him of being thoughtless and focused on Snape.

The spy continued to be as unreadable as he had been the first time Sirius had met him. It was infuriating to never know what the man was thinking or feeling.

_I know Dumbledore trusts him, but Dumbledore can afford to be a little lax in his judgments because of how powerful he is. I've known Snape since we were eleven. That kind of attitude doesn't just change over night. But he got into my mind. Easily. He let me throw him out of my head. He lied to Voldemort and took a Crucio and still didn't say anything. Which side is he on?_

Sirius' thoughts were interrupted when Snape opened a door and quickly entered. He put Sirius on a couch and turned back to the door. He locked it first with two deadbolts and then recited several spells, few of which Sirius recognized.

Finally Snape turned to face him and removed his bindings and gag. "We may speak freely here. I've placed several wards and charms to prevent anyone from overhearing and there is an alarm that will sound if anyone tries to tamper or remove any of them, even if it's the Dark Lord."

As he spoke he ran his wand over Sirius, who watched it warily. "It's just a diagnostic spell so that I can heal you better" he snapped.

"Why'd you do it?" Sirius asked hoarsely.

Snape knew what he was talking about, but contemplated his answer for a moment. He fetched three different potions and moved back to where Sirius was before answering.

"I assure you, it was not because I secretly want to be your friend, and no I will not hold this over your head and force you to be my slave in repayment, although that does sound attractive."

"Damn it Snape, be serious."

To his surprise he saw a small smile grace the professor's face before quickly being replaced with a scowl. "I do believe that's your job."

Sirius gave a scowl of his own. "Why can't you give me a straight answer?"

"Why should I? I have no reason to think you would believe me and I can ill afford to let someone I don't trust know a secret that could cost me my life." The potions master turned away from him and stood to retrieve another potion.

Instead of answering, Sirius tried to hear what the spy was really saying. _Snape's right. I still might not believe him even if he does tell me. How many secrets does he have to keep? Surely he can tell Dumbledore. Is that why he's always alone? He can't trust us, so better to not even be civil with us? Ah! Why can't I just accept that Snape's impossible to figure out?_

Sirius sat up gingerly only to be pushed back down. "You will hurt yourself more. Just lie down and take these." Snape brandished several potions bottles.

"What are they?"

"Good to see that you don't trust me."

"It's not that-"

"Save it. You don't trust me because you shouldn't. I've seen to that" Sirius missed the look in Snape's eyes that spoke of past pain. "Now, this one-" he held up a purple bottle. "-is a Blood Replenishing Potion. These-" two green bottles. "-will take care of the internal injuries. And this-" a blue vial. "-will help with the superficial cuts and such."

Sirius just looked at the potions with thinly veiled mistrust.

Snape sighed, "If I wanted to kill you, I assure you I would not hand you the poison- I'm cleverer than that. Besides, you heard the Dark Lord tell me to heal you."

Sirius decided that the pain he was feeling in his ribs outweighed his mistrust of Snape and took the two green bottles first. They burned down his throat and he coughed, eyes watering. He reached for the blue one but Snape held it back.

"I should have assumed that your knowledge of potions hasn't improved since school. You will need to wait half an hour to take this because it would interfere with the work being done internally. Take the other one and sit back."

Sirius resisted the urge to snap back and took the purple vial. It tasted of peppermint and Sirius sighed in relief as his ribs ceased to pain him with every breath.

He turned around to thank Snape for the potions but he was no where in sight. _He'll be back; he took the last potion I need. _Sirius resolved himself to wait patiently until the spy came back.

Almost forty minutes later Snape returned and held out the blue potion bottle to Sirius. As he took the potion he noticed that Snape was shaking ever so slightly.

"Snape?" the spy looked at him. "Are you ok?"

He sneered, "I'm fine. You shouldn't concern yourself with this lowly Death Eater. Really, what would James say?"

The bait worked and Sirius became angry instead of concerned. "Don't you dare bring James up, you worthless Slytherin scum."

Snape didn't seem mad, though, at the outburst. He stood to leave the room but looked down at Sirius, "If you need anything-food, water, or something along those lines- call Oreo and she'll get you what you want within reason."

The spy continued to leave, determined not to give Black an opportunity to ask him anything. He heard Black call out to him but he refused to turn around, refused to acknowledge the other man. After all, he had to inform the Order.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"What do you mean he's your prisoner?" Lupin rose from his seat, looking at the spy with thinly veiled hatred.

"It's not that hard of a concept, Lupin" Snape said casually. He could feel the Headmaster's sharp eyes and inclined his head to the elder wizard.

"Severus, please. We're having a hard time understanding what happened when Sirius disappeared. Fill us in" Dumbledore leaned back in his chair, careful to keep his gaze on Severus, warning the young man not to bait them.

Snape sneered, gazed at the Order members in front of him, and gave them a brief overview of what happened.

"Black was captured either on late Friday or early Saturday. I was not alerted of his capture until this afternoon. The Dark Lord turned him over to me after I arrived and then I reported here. We should be free of the pain from the mental barriers, as Black is in my custody, as it were, and the Dark Lord won't be Legilimizing him until I tell him that I can breach the shields."

Dumbledore shook his head, _I cannot tell if he's leaving out the details to be difficult or because he doesn't want to share them with everyone. _

Lupin looked worried, "He's been there for a week? How badly is he hurt? What did you do to him?"

Snape hid his pain behind his mask, _you think so little of me. _"Black is fine and will remain fine for as long as I can make it so."

Moody limped over and stared hard at him, "What do you mean by _fine_? It's no secret that you hate him. We have only your word that he's fine. Why can't you do more? You say he's your captive, so you should be able to get him out."

Snape snarled, "And you think that the Dark Lord would not notice that he went missing? Would not wonder why I did not prevent him from escaping?"

"That line of thinking implies that I care what happens to you after Sirius is out."

"Alastor!" Dumbledore stood, his eyes blazing. He looked to Snape and felt something in his chest pull; the man seemed completely indifferent to what Moody had said.

_Oh, my boy. Is this what it has come to? You who sacrifice everything for them, you are forced to wear your mask in front of them as well. _

Dumbledore shook his head sadly and then turned once more to Moody. "You know that Severus' position in Voldemort's ranks is vital to the Order. Sirius is under Severus' care and for now he is out of harm's way. We will figure something out and get Sirius back soon, won't we Severus?"

He looked over to him, surprised to see a flash of bitterness in the spy's eyes. "Of course, Headmaster" he sneered. "We wouldn't want your precious Gryffindor to suffer, would we?"

He left with a sharp turn, everyone's eyes on his retreating form. He made his way to the Floo, intending to go to his laboratory at Hogwarts to work on the potion, when he nearly ran into Molly.

He slid out of the way and his hand shot out to steady her. "My apologies, Molly." He could feel his hand trembling; _damn the Cruciatus curse,_ and removed his hand quickly, hoping that she hadn't noticed.

He moved towards the Floo once more when her voice stopped him. "Severus?" she called hesitantly.

He turned to face her; he had little respect for most of the members of the Order, but he spared a small amount for her. After all, she did have to put up with Fred and George on a daily basis and was able to control them with more finesse than he ever could. He took a deep breath, trying to control his tremors and turned to look at her.

"You're welcome to stay for dinner you know. There's plenty."

"No Molly, I think I do enough without ruining your meals as well" he gave her a small smile. "Meals should be spent with friends and family, I hold no illusions as to my place in this house."

He took a handful of Floo Powder and tossed it into the fire when he felt a hand on his shoulder. He resisted the urge to flinch and looked at Molly.

Her mouth was firmly set but her eyes betrayed her. "Surely you don't believe that Severus."

He was growing tired of this; he wanted to retire to his rooms. He glared at the woman in front of him, "What evidence do you have to prove me wrong?"

The hand on his shoulder gripped him harder and Snape forced himself to look her in the eyes, "Molly. Don't make this hard on yourself. I am not worth the trouble. You have seven children who will be or already are on the front line of this war. Worry about them. Merlin knows I can only help them so much."

He had whispered the last part, almost unaware that he had said it at all. Eyes hardening he gently removed her hand and Flooed to Hogwarts.

Molly stood there for several minutes replaying each word he had said to her. She couldn't, no, _wouldn't _accept that he seemed to care so little about himself. But the more she thought about it, the more she realized that he had been right, _We've never given him any indication that we were concerned for him._

Molly glanced at the now empty Floo and returned to the kitchen, still pondering what Snape had revealed to her.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Snape burst into his rooms and looked around angrily for Winky. Thankfully she wasn't there, so he headed straight for his personal lab. He stalked around the lab, collecting ingredients and muttering angrily to himself.

"Of course we'll get Black out. We wouldn't want him to suffer at all. Oh, and Severus, get him out and make sure you don't let the Dark Lord suspect you. What do they want me to do? Black is the Dark Lord's most important prisoner now. He's only alive because the Dark Lord thinks I am learning how to get through the Order's barriers. Either he will end up dead, or I will."

He stopped moving around the room as soon as his last sentence left his mouth. _I must control myself. I'm behaving like a Gryffindor. _He set the ingredients down and took several controlled breaths. He retreated inside his mind to work on his Occlumency shields, as he had always done when the stress became too much.

He inspected his defenses thoroughly, changing little things, hiding new memories, and when he emerged he felt calmer and more in control.

His eyes were as dark as a moonless night.

He took the potion ingredients once more and moved over to his caldron, summoning his notes as he walked, and prepared for a long night of brewing.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Winky popped into the Potions Master's rooms at precisely four o'clock in the morning. She wondered where the man himself was, since he was often back by now. A loud "boom" sounded from the adjacent room; Snape's personal lab.

Winky ran over and flung the door open to reveal a grouchy, dirty, and somewhat bloodstained Potions Master.

"Sir, what are you doing?" Winky's tone of incredulity forced him to stop and look at her.

"What does it look like I'm doing?" he replied silkily as he moved to a second cauldron. "Winky, I am in the middle of a delicate brewing process, still experimental, so there will be several more explosions. There is no need for you to come running."

"Does sir plan on eating or sleeping at all?"

"Probably not, so no use in nagging me."

"I will fetch Madame Pomfrey if you don't."

"You will do what you feel you must. Besides, Poppy hasn't come near my rooms since I threw her out the last time."

Winky huffed and decided she would bring some meals to the stubborn man throughout the day. She left and closed the door behind her.

Snape, however, wasn't paying attention to the house elf at all. He was already following another train of thought as to how to make his potion stable.

In one cauldron, on his farthest right, was the Draught of Living Death. He walked over and stirred it several more times- it was coming along nicely now and would soon be clear as water.

He paused, running through a mental list of the ingredients and brewing steps and compared it to the potion on his immediate left.

This was a new one, for the wizarding world at least, and one of Snape's creations. The potion was designed to inflict the same pain as the Cruciatus Curse. He had created it when he was younger and loyal to the Death Eaters. He only thanked himself that he had never written down the steps nor told anyone how to make it. Only Snape had the knowledge of how to brew it.

Currently he was working on a way to isolate part of the potion, namely what caused the pain, and remove it. He had several theories as to which ingredients combined in the right way would cause unbearable pain, but he had to be sure.

That brought him to the third cauldron, above both the other cauldrons, and making it the tip of the triangle, so to speak. He was currently brewing the Cruciatus potion again, going through the steps carefully. He had taken out one of the more poisonous ingredients, thinking that it was the root of the reactions that caused the pain, and was brewing it from scratch.

As it simmered he watched the changes and noted the effect that the absence of the snake venom made. Instead of being a bright orange the potion turned a pale yellow and gave off a gas. He watched it cautiously, prepared to raise a shield if it should explode, but the potion looked stable.

He added the last ingredients and set a time charm for twenty minutes. Walking back to the Draught of Living Death, he was pleased to see that it was completed and filled six bottles with it.

He marked them carefully and placed three of them aside; glancing at the calendar he kept. _The full moon is in two weeks, Lupin will need the Wolfsbane in a week, I should start that now. _He put a fourth cauldron over a flame and began preparing the ingredients for the base. He knew that the potion had to be made with no stops, so for now he just prepared what he would need.

He returned to the yellow potion after the charm expired and took out an eyedropper. Filling it all the way he walked over to cage in the back of the room that held rats. He picked one up, _pity this isn't Wormtail, _and forced the animal to ingest the potion.

Immediately the animal began to twitch and shake, but it did not squeak or make any sounds that indicated pain. Snape watched for several minutes until the tremors abated and finally stopped after seven minutes.

_It seemed as if the animal was in no pain. _He would have to run further tests to be sure, but for now it looked like the potion was a success. He bottled two dozen vials, marked them, and set them all aside. He placed stasis charms on the Draught of Living Death and what remained of the new potion. He bottled the entire Cruciatus potion and stored it securely in his warded cupboard.

He returned to the Wolfsbane and began brewing it, his mind completely absorbed by the task.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

McGonagall turned to the Headmaster, "Have you seen Severus since last night?"

"No, my dear, I haven't. But then, we rarely do see him on the weekend."

"You're right, but he usually makes it to dinner at least" she grumbled, worried about her colleague.

"You worry far too much, Professor. I'm sure that Professor Snape is fine" the Headmaster beamed.

The Deputy Headmistress looked down at her plate grumpily, _I'm sure that Severus isn't fine, especially after the meeting. Alastor was completely out of line and no one else objected. I know that Severus values his privacy, but if he doesn't make an appearance at breakfast tomorrow I will check on him._

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Deep within Voldemort's mansion Sirius Black paced the room restlessly. He had asked the house elf, Oreo, for a book to read, but he had put it down after the first page. His mind kept wrestling with the enigma that was Severus Snape.

He was so confused; _it's so hard to trust him. I can't even be sure he's on our side with the way he acts. _

He couldn't even pretend to judge the spy impartially; his experiences at Hogwarts had already shown him everything he wanted to know about Snape. And he knew none of it was good.

Sitting back down with a frustrated sigh, Sirius picked up the book again and began to read.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Unknown to Sirius, someone was coming to see him. She slid through the hallway with ease and located Snape's room with just one glance. She knew that her Lord had said that Black would be for Snape until he broke through the Order's protections, but what would a couple of _Crucio's_ hurt?

She pulled out her wand with a soft cackle of anticipation and put her hand on the door knob.

BAM! She was blown back across the hall and hit the wall. She looked at the door curiously, and decided to see what wards were on the room. After five minutes of testing, she had determined at least four different wards, and she was sure that those were only the most basic and low leveled ones- it was Snape's room, after all. _But why would Snape go to such lengths to keep others out? He hates my cousin._

She turned around and left the hallway, confused, but determined to get to the bottom of things.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I'm sure you can all guess who was trying to get into Snape's room. The real question is- how does she know where his room is? Bonus points to whoever gets closest.

I have the next couple of chapters outlined but I can't promise speedy updates for several reasons that I will not bore you with. Just know that I am working on the chapters and haven't given up.

Hope you enjoyed and thanks again to all of you who reviewed!

Always,

Sinkme


	5. Chapter 5

imsorryimsorry- but here's an update :-)

Wow- thanks to all my reviewers:

Dracosbaby08- The pairings aren't really my focus although it might turn out to be Snape/Hermione but you'll have to wait a while for that to come through. And yes, Harry will make a very important entrance later

ArabellaKye- I think Bellatrix is cleverer than most people give her credit for...and as for Sirius, don't worry- it'll all work out in the end and the Order will eventually see what's really going on.

Laiquendi- I'm glad you like it and I agree that the Order and Dumbly need to open their eyes but it will take a while to change their minds...good thing this will be a long story.

RebeccaRoy- Yea, Bellatrix is after Sirius (but who isn't :-) and things within the Order will soon come to an explosive meeting...

It matters not- Don't worry, Dumbledore isn't being cold/manipulative, he just knows that Snape values privacy and isn't in immediate danger- he isn't using Snape and does care for him. As for the bonus- isn't the sheer joy of being right enough? (siriusly, I will try to update more).

Alicia (anon)- Thanks for reading. The Order will come around eventually but Molly has the easiest time (besides Dumbledore) accepting Snape.

elif is there (anon)- im trying to work on developing each character more but its not something i have a lot of practice with so i can't promise my characters won't be a little stunted...thanks for your review!

I'm sad that only one person guessed why Bellatrix knew where Snape's room was...I was expecting some funny answers. Oh well, all will be revealed in time

Disclaimer: is this necessary?

Chapter 5

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Snape blinked as he looked at his clock. _Is it 8 already?_ He glanced around the room, inspecting the two cauldrons that were held under the Stasis Charm. The Wolfsbane was almost complete. The final ingredients had to be added after thirteen hours of simmering; the only break in the potion. He decided to go to the Great Hall for breakfast.

He quickly jumped in the shower and then put on a clean set of robes, making sure that the collar came up to just below his chin. He knew he looked exhausted so he put on a quick Glamour Charm; not because he was vain, but because he knew that his colleagues would ask questions otherwise.

He strode quickly through the halls, keeping an eye out for any students he could take points from, and used the back entrance into the Great Hall. He sat down in the only seat available, cursing his bad luck. He was stuck between McGonagall and Dumbledore.

"Severus, good to see you. I trust you've been well" the old man peered at him from behind his glasses.

"Define well" Snape said sourly. "Since we've discovered that my definition of 'fine' is obviously lacking."

McGonagall pursed her lips, "Severus, Alastor was completely out of line last night."

"Please, Minerva. Don't" Snape said coldly, but the older woman could hear the undertone in his voice that begged her not to discuss it.

She nodded and returned to her breakfast, noticing that Dumbledore leaned closer and whispered something to Snape who shook his head stubbornly and said, "It's nothing."

Snape left several minutes later and both McGonagall and Dumbledore were upset to see that he had hardly eaten anything.

"Albus, he'll work himself to death. He's barely eating."

"Or sleeping" he said with a sigh.

"What? He looked fine" McGonagall peered curiously at him.

"He was wearing a Glamour. I asked him why but he brushed me off. I'm worried for him" Dumbledore said sadly.

"Albus, we have to do something. He's being stretched much too thin and he has no support or help. Merlin knows he never comes to us for help no matter how often we tell him to." McGonagall said angrily.

"I know, Minerva. I am at a loss, though, to find a solution that will help him without injuring his pride."

"Forget his pride, Albus."

"That is something I cannot do, Minerva. I know you think I am at times unfair to Severus, and I admit that I sacrifice Severus so that others will be safe for a little longer, but I always have his interests at heart. His pride is all he has left and to submit himself to our meddling would take away everything that he has worked so hard to control. Tell me, Minerva, do you recall what color his eyes were when he was at school?"

"They were black, of course, the same as they are now" she looked at him, confused.

"No, my dear. They were brown. Severus has worked so hard to Occlude his mind, and he has kept his barriers up for so long that he has close to the best self-control I have ever seen in anyone. The longer his shields are in place, the more of himself he locks away. I wouldn't have noticed it myself if it weren't for one time several years ago when he reinforced his barriers in my presence and I noticed that his eyes were darker after he had finished. Of course I said nothing, but I learned that he was locking himself away because his emotions were one of the only things he could control, but even they were forced to be regulated based on the role he was playing: strict and unfeeling as a teacher, loyal and submissive as a Death Eater. No, his pride is something I would never dream of taking away from Severus. So the question is: How to trick a Slytherin?"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

As it was a Sunday with no Quidditch match, Snape locked himself in his lab to complete his work on the new Cruciatus potion. He tested it several more times on the rats before deciding that it was safe to test on a human.

Aka, himself.

He lined up several potions that he would need if something went wrong, although he doubted it, and cleared a large space on the floor. He put his wand on the table, within arms reach, and lay down.

He knew it was twelve types of foolish to test a potion that he only thought would work on himself. He knew it, but he had no choice. Who else would he test it on? No, he had neither the time nor the patience to find a willing test subject.

He swallowed the potion, hardly noticing the taste as tremors immediately seized his body. He thrashed and flailed around on the floor. But he felt no pain. Well, aside from when his elbow or knee would hit the floor or his head would snap back. Compared to the pain of the Cruciatus, though, it was a definite improvement and he labeled it a success.

He waited for the tremors to wind down and discovered that they lasted for nine and a half minutes as opposed to seven minutes for the rats. He gave himself several more minutes until he was sure he could control his movements, and then stood and took a mild Calming Draught.

He was very pleased with his success. The potion got him one step closer to several of his goals and he allowed himself a small smile before carefully bottling and labeling the new potion.

The Wolfsbane had several more hours until he could finish it so he used the afternoon to plan several lessons and grade the essays that had piled up. Halfway through the third year's essays his Floo turned green and the Headmaster stepped through.

"Severus" the Headmaster greeted him. He peered over his glasses at the spy. "Are you feeling well?"

"I am fine" Snape answered without looking up from the essays.

"Just busy" the old man said good-naturedly.

Snape just nodded, not even bothering to respond. "I know that I ask so much of you Severus-"

"And yet you are here to add even more to that, no doubt" he didn't look up, although his tone almost gave him away.

Dumbledore nodded sadly. "I need you to teach Harry Occlumency."

Snape looked up sharply, "You were serious? Absolutely not. It will be a disaster. He won't learn. Albus, if you want Potter to learn this then you have to teach him."

"I believe he will be better motivated with you as his teacher" Dumbledore sighed. "I would not ask this of you if I thought either of you were incapable of doing this. But I think this is for the best."

Snape knew that Dumbledore had made up his mind and decided that arguing would be pointless. Furious beyond words he merely waved his hand, indicating that Dumbledore should leave.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

In his office Dumbledore sat behind his desk thinking hard about his spy.

_I would teach Harry myself if I thought it would do any good, but I know Harry too well to think that he would learn effectively if I taught this to him. He needs to feel threatened, he needs to be on the defensive, with a clear enemy to guide and focus his anger into strong Occlumency shields. I only regret that he views Severus as that enemy. Severus is a strong Occlumens and I have no doubt that he can teach Harry to defend his mind and give him the incentive to learn it quickly. As it stands now Severus has too much to do, there is no possible way that he could teach Harry in addition to his other duties. It is the mundane tasks which take too much of his time: grading papers, preparing lesson plans, collecting ingredients, making the potions for the Hospital Wing. He needs a- what is the Muggle term? A teaching assistant. Who would-_

Inspiration struck and he called McGonagall to his office.

"Please bring Hermione Granger to my office, Minerva."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Snape spent the next hours working on trying to figure out a way to combine the Draught of Living Death with the new Cruciatus potion. They had very few ingredients in common and it was taking all of his self control not to scream in frustration.

He threw his papers down as a timer for the Wolfsbane chimed and went to finish the potion. He soon settled into a calm rhythm and was able think about his upcoming lessons with Potter.

He knew that a subtle approach wouldn't work with the boy, but Occlumency was all about subtlety. He was at a loss as to how he should teach him when his Dark mark flared.

_Damn it all!_

In a frenzy he gathered his cloak and mask and called Winky. She appeared with a 'pop' a moment later. "Winky, I need you to go to Professor Dumbledore and tell him I've been summoned and that he needs to finish the Wolfsbane I'm brewing or it will be ruined. All he needs to do is add the powdered root and stir. He knows what to do."

Winky nodded and 'popped' away while Snape ran through the secret passageway and apparated as soon as he was clear of the wards.

He arrived as several others did and took his place in the circle, on the Dark Lord's left. _A fitting place for a spy_ he thought as he mentally prepared himself. He waited with an air of cool indifference as the rest of those called settled into the circle and knelt before Voldemort.

"Welcome my friendss. I have called you here for several reasons" He swept around the circle, gazing at his followers. "We have been lax as of late, but our enemies mistake our intentions. We have been cleverly biding our time, setting the board so that by the time they realize what we have done it will be much too late to do anything."

The Death Eaters cheered, Snape mechanically followed them in their shouts, but he was instantly assessing the situation. _I have much less time than I had thought if the Dark Lord is confidant about this plan. I need to complete the potion!_

Voldemort turned towards Severus, his eyes resting on his masked face for a moment before turning back to face the circle. "We will continue planning, of course, my friends. For we are the serpent waiting silently in the grass. And when we strike it will be fast and devastating."

Again, the cheers came, but Voldemort held his arm out and immediately silenced them.

"I have a reward for you, my faithful followers. Your brother Avery found a family of filthy Muggles that have hid their connection to our world for far too long. And it is a connection indeed." He held his arm out again and signaled to Avery, who drew his wand and brought three Muggles into the circle.

Snape stared in muted shock as the Dursleys were revived and unbound.

The child looked around fearfully, while his parents seemed to comprehend their horrible situation in horror.

The woman, his mind refused to name her for fear of invoking memories of his childhood and Lily, pulled her son closer to herself as she shook in fear.

"Play nice, these are after all Harry's dear relatives" Voldemort cackled as his Death Eaters advanced on the Muggles with a malicious intent so potent that it was almost palpable in the air itself.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"You want me to help Professor Snape?"

"Yes, Miss Granger. Nothing too serious. You would be helping him with his lesson plans, keeping the ingredients organized and fresh, possibly brewing a few potions for the Hospital Wing."

"Forgive me, sir. Um, is Professor Snape aware of this arrangement?"

Hermione blushed as Dumbledore laughed. "My dear, I do not give your perceptiveness enough credit." He looked at her squarely. "No, Professor Snape is not yet aware of this, and will remain that way for most of the week. In all likelihood you won't start helping him until next Monday at the earliest. You will, of course, be exempt from patrols as a Prefect for helping Professor Snape."

"Thank you, sir. Um, should- I mean will I be expected to…Will Professor Snape-." She stopped and blushed again.

Dumbledore smiled and guessed at her intent, "Professor Snape will most likely resent your help in the beginning, Miss Granger, but I am confidant that you will prove equal to the task. I am not asking for you to become a confidante, just someone to help lessen his load" Here he glanced towards Fawkes, "I am sure you are aware that he has much going on."

Hermione nodded and remained silent, she knew that Snape was in the Order, but she did not yet have confirmation as to his role.

"I will let you know what to do after I have spoken to Professor Snape."

"Yes, sir." Hermione bid him a good afternoon and walked towards the library to finish a Transfiguration assignment, thinking of her Potions Professor and what Professor Dumbledore thought she could do to help him.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Snape stumbled into his room, exhausted both mentally and physically. He could do nothing but replay the events of the meeting in his head and was tempted to remove them to a Pensieve, but he knew that removing memories completely was dangerous and too tempting to do on a regular basis for long periods of time.

Instead he delved into his mind, determined to lock these memories away. Wisps of the murders flitted across his mind, but he refused to be overwhelmed by them.

_The child's screams as Dolohov and Rodolphus used burning hexes and the Cruciatus on him…._

_Avery's face as Petunia begged and pleaded for him to stop as he passed her to another Death Eater…_

_Bellatrix's fiendish delight as the man was forced under the Imperius to kill himself by severing his own hand off…_

_All the while he felt he could feel their eyes on him, burning into his soul, blaming him for their deaths. He could hear Lily now, cursing him, "How could you Severus? You stood by and let them kill my sister. My sister! You are beyond anyone's help and you don't deserve any kindness shown to you!"_

"No!" His eyes snapped open as he forced the memories to recede to the back of his mind, secured by his Occlumency walls.

He stood slowly and noticed that the Wolfsbane was completed and placed into the correct storing goblets so that it would remain potent until Lupin needed it next week.

He decided his need for sleep outweighed the pressing matter of the Cruciatus potion, so he headed for his room. To better relax his mind and body, he started some light stretching exercises when he was interrupted by a 'pop.'

"M-Master?"

He emerged from his room in a foul mood and looked at the elf.

"What, Oreo?" he spat.

"Apologies, Master, Mister Black is demanding to see you, sir."

"Demanding?" he asked icily.

Oreo shrank back at hearing his master's voice, but answered nonetheless, "He is asking most insistently, sir." The elf nodded pulled his ears as he spoke.

"Oreo," Snape began to understand the situation. "Has he broken any of my belongings?"

The elf wailed and dropped to the ground, hitting his head on the floor. "I tried, Master. I tried so very hard to make him stop."

Snape's hand reached out to grasp the elf by the back of his shirt. "Oreo, I believe I was clear when I met you that you will not harm yourself while you serve me."

"Forgive me, Master."

Snape released the elf, "I will see to our guest" he spat the word out and walked back to his room to get his robes. He heard the elf 'pop' again and sighed.

"Trust Black to need to speak to me now of all times."

He pulled out the Portkey he made to take him to his rooms in Voldemort's lair and activated it with the password, "Godric's hollow."

He was determined to make the visit as short as possible, so when he saw Black sitting on the couch he put on his best sneer and said condescendingly, "It seems you've missed my company so much that you can hardly go two days without seeing my face."

"Save it, Snape. I need some answers. I've been here for some time now with no news of what is happening and I refuse to be kept in the dark any longer. What is the Order doing? Is Harry ok? When am I getting out of here?"

Snape's curled into a cruel smile, "You seem awfully convinced that I'm on your side, Black."

Sirius' confidence seemed to falter as he sought an answer to that.

Snape took advantage of his silence, "The Order is doing nothing, as it is best at doing. Potter is still the same arrogant brat he was before you were captured, and you are here until I see fit to change your situation. Interesting that you haven't commented on your werewolf friend, seeing as he will be changing soon. I wonder how he will cope without you there to romp around with."

If Sirius was mad before, this last comment pushed him over the edge. "How dare you?! You, who have never known the friendship I share with Remus, or the love I feel for Harry. How dare you judge me for being human! You can't even consider yourself alive since you never feel anything at all."

Snape bore his comments in silence and waited until Sirius' breathing evened out before speaking again.

"I trust those were the only questions you had since anymore would expand your maximum thought capacity. Now, you will not destroy any more of my possessions. I will keep you informed when I feel it is appropriate, and you will not bother me."

"Why can't you be civil for once?" Sirius asked irritably.

Snape mock bowed and said, "I wasn't raised according to the same lofty Pureblood ideals as you were, _Black._ Forgive me for my manners, but I do not feel the need to be civil in present company."

Sirius looked at Snape in such a mix of emotions that Snape had trouble placing the look. _It couldn't possibly be resignation..._

"I know I've given you absolutely no reason to trust me, or to be civil to me, but I have had no news of the Order or anyone I am close to- all I'm asking is confirmation that they are ok."

Snape was so taken back by his statement and tone that for a minute he could only stare at his childhood enemy in wonder. After a moment he ventured, "There have been no attacks recently, the Order members are fine. Potter is at Hogwarts and will remain there or safely protected by the Order for the year, including the holidays."

The two remained where they were for several more minutes, confused as to what to do next. Snape suddenly moved to his Portkey but was stopped when Sirius called his name. "I-" he sighed. "I apologize for breaking your belongings."

Snape nodded and activated the Portkey once more. Sirius stared at the space that Snape had just left, confused, but feeling relieved that he knew everyone was safe.

Snape arrived back in his quarters in a mood that he didn't even want to attempt to name and went straight for his bed. He was resolved to get as much sleep as he could and not to dwell on Black's odd behavior. Snape's last thought before he sank into oblivion was- _and the Gryffindors and Slytherins are first tomorrow morning._

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Hey guys! (Ducks to avoid angry villagers with pitchforks)

I'm sorry it took me so long and that it's kind of shortish; I solemnly swear that I will maybe try to do better at updating faster and better (Smile worthy of Lucius).

Quick note: I wasn't sure in the fifth book if Hermione was sure that Snape was a spy but in my story she is only aware that he's in the Order. She will be a little naïve for a while so bear with me; I'll do my best to develop her character as I go.

Quick note 2: I don't remember what story it was, but there was a story that I read that first came up with the idea of Snape's eyes being the result of his Occlumency shields. If you know the story please tell me so I can give the author credit!!

Comments? Constructive criticism?

Always,

Sinkme


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Thanks to all my reviewers:

Kascade: Thanks for your support

Cardigrl (anon): I'm sorry that you don't like Hermione being in the story, but that's how I set it up. She's going to be annoying and naïve in the beginning but working with Snape will force her to look beyond Hogwarts and it will be a good change for her. I hope her involvement didn't ruin the story for you. And besides- there's no way Snape would sit back and let a Gryffindor boss him around. He's got a plan…

Jennie (anon): Sorry for the ending, it was all I could think of and thanks for your support. I'm glad that you like it from Snape's pov. I think it's the easiest way to write this story.

Shizu6616 (anon)- I'm still not sure if the story will end up being Hermione/Snape, they're just the two main characters. I'm fairly certain this won't end up as a Sirius/Sev slash since I don't think I could write that. Thanks for your advice

Excessivelyperky- Thank you so much for your reviews! They were a huge source of inspiration. Snape's relationship with Winky is different from his relationship with Dumbledore, so she's able to interact with him differently than Dumbledore could. Thanks for all your comments!

I don't think I've put this up for this story, but it's in "Hope" and I finally decided to put it in here.

Maintenance:

_Thought_

"Normal speaking"

"_Spell"_

_Nonverbal Spell_

"_Parseltounge"_

Disclaimer: I'm just a poor student who can't take her head out of the books- don't sue me

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Snape awoke around two hours before the sun would even think of peaking over the horizon. He lay still, hoping to trick his body into resting more, but knew it was useless.

He stood slowly, trying to get the cricks out of his back, and frowned. _When was the last time I really stretched? _He knew that he had no time, but his physical fitness was important to staying alive. He decided to remedy that and shrunk everything in the room that could be safely reduced and moved to the center of his bedroom.

He started slowly, controlling his breathing and trying to bleed his frustration and anger away. _Occlumency is only good for so long until these emotions need to be released. _He knew that he was well past his breaking point, and so after only ten minutes he was working himself into a frenzy, moving swiftly into martial arts stances and routines that he had drilled himself in all those years ago.

Half an hour into what used to be mild stretching, Snape was half kneeling on the floor, head down, and his long hair hiding his face. With one last burst of frustration he slammed his fist down into the hard stone floor, screaming all of his pent up anger out.

He took long, gasping breaths and cradled his hand to his chest, focusing on the rhythmic throbbing that shot through his hand. The pain helped center him, forcing him to acknowledge what was happening as the present and not an unfortunate dream.

Taking several more deep breaths, he recovered his wand from where he had placed it on the floor and cast "_Engorgio"_ on the furniture and returned the pieces to their place. He then cast several healing charms on his hand.

Flexing his fingers slightly he winced and tried to shake the soreness out of them. He walked over to his armoire and dressed himself slowly. First his long white collared shirt, then his black pants, black vest buttoned to the top, and he methodically pulled the collar over his vest and flattened it against his neck. Since he had several more hours until breakfast and his first class he decided to forgo his teaching robes and he walked to his lab to check the potions.

All of the potions were bottled and the instructions that he had meticulously written were in his private safe. It was these that he pulled out to peruse and look for any way to combine the two potions. He settled into a chair and forced his mind to focus on the task before him.

_Maybe substituting something for the sopophorous bean in the Draught of Living Death, something that would be compatible to the hellebore in the Cruciatus potion. But the Cruciatus potion is already unstable with the absence of the snake venom. The venom is what triggers the pain; the other ingredients are harmless until combined with the venom so it cannot be added at all. Damn it all!_

He threw his notes down in frustration and put his head in his hands. _This isn't working. I can't combine these two potions, which means I'll need to make them together as a single potion instead of looking for a common link between them. Making it as a single potion will take too long, though. I don't have the time- Black doesn't have that kind of time. I cannot continue like this._

Potions work long forgotten, he moved to grade the essays that had been piling up. It was a tedious and mind numbing job, but it was exactly what he needed at the moment and so he attacked the pile with relish.

With only an hour or so until he was needed in the Great Hall for breakfast, he began to prepare the classroom for a new week of Potions classes. Several ingredients needed to be restocked from the potions cupboard, and two of the glass stirring rods had been broken and needed to be replaced.

He completed these and other menial tasks until he deemed it an appropriate time to go to the Great Hall. Grabbing his robes and carefully completing the outfit, he strode through the dungeons, on the lookout of any students who thought to spice up a Monday morning with a prank.

Snape arrived in the Hall without incident and proceeded to his usual place, to the left of the Headmaster and next to Filius.

_Filius_ he supposed_ isn't that bad. He is one of the few on the staff whom I can tolerate on a weekly basis. He does not observe the ritual chit chat with me every morning- although he has learned by now not to expect a sympathetic ear from me._

Thus, Snape was surprised when he was greeted by Flitwick in a most jovial manner. He raised his eyebrow at the older wizard, who simply smiled and looked past him at Albus.

Snape followed his look to meet the Headmaster's eye and saw the aged wizard nod slowly, as if to corroborate something that Flitwick had said.

Snape fought with his hard earned self control to keep himself from banging his head against the table as he realized what had occurred over the weekend. _Filius will never leave me alone now that he's in the Order too. When I first started teaching he was convinced that I was in need of an older, wiser mentor to keep me from the tragic mistakes of my past and took it upon himself to help me in every way he could. He learned, eventually, that I was not- am not- a social person and it took some rather over the top comments- which upon reflection were rather rude- to get him to leave me alone. Now he surely knows of my role as a double agent and will smother me with pity or sympathy- neither of which I will tolerate._

But again, Flitwick surprised Snape as he leaned over and said in a hushed voice, "Lad, I don't think anyone has ever surprised me as thoroughly as you have. And I'm sorry for doubting you so spectacularly."

Then he leaned over to get some jam and began to drown his toast with it, as if nothing had happened. Snape was shocked by Flitwick's statement, and he was deeply annoyed to feel something along the lines of gratitude for the wizard sitting on his left.

He turned to the Headmaster and dropped his voice, "I have some information that must be discussed as soon as possible. You will need to see someone about keeping the murder of three Muggles out of the headlines when their bodies are found as well."

Dumbledore turned to face him, "Who?"

Snape returned his look, fully aware that the Headmaster already had a good idea of who the latest victims were, but he wanted to be wrong. Unfortunately Snape couldn't give him that relief, "Potter's relatives."

Dumbledore closed his eyes momentarily, "I had hoped the wards and their ignorance would protect them. We could not spare anyone from the Order to guard them when Harry is not there; just as several other families are left unprotected." The aged Headmaster surveyed the room, his gaze lingering on several Muggleborn students before turning back to Snape. "Very well, Severus, come to my office after your last class. I rather suspect we will have several things to discuss."

Snape nodded and returned to his light breakfast while he began to scan the mass of chatting students below. Out of habit he located first Potter, then Draco, and then several other students: _Crabbe/Goyle, Zabini, Parkinson, Bones, Weasley one, Weasleys two and three, Weasley four, Longbottom, Gra-_

He blinked upon seeing the girl's face turned towards his. _Why is she looking at me?_ For it could only be him, his mind left no doubt that she had looked up at him when his eyes had searched for her. She turned her head, clearly embarrassed to be caught looking at him, but he could not think of any reason.

He watched her for several more minutes; her head popped up only once more, this time to sneak a quick glance at the Headmaster.

_Something is happening. And I have been kept in the dark._

Snape turned to his right to look at the Headmaster, who resolutely refused to meet his gaze.

_Fine, I will discover what is being kept from me. After all, the first class is Gryffindor and Slytherin fifth year. And I think the old codger knows that I will figure it out and be rather upset about it. Fan-bloody-tastic._

His lips curled into their customary sneer as he continued to watch the students.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

He was waiting for them when they entered the classroom and Hermione's stomach curled nervously. _Stop being ridiculous, Professor Dumbledore hasn't told him yet. Just don't give him a reason to suspect anything and you'll be fine._

Naturally, Snape was doubly suspicious when he asked a question and Hermione's hand did not go up at all.

"Mr. Malfoy"

"Yes sir?"

"I must ask a favor. Please go up to one of the corridors and look outside and report back to me."

"Sir?" Being Snape's godson, Draco was used to the Potions Master's sense of humor, and knew not to take the request seriously.

"Well, the world must be ending if Miss Granger isn't raising her hand and I would like to know if it is raining fire."

Several Slytherins burst into laughter and Snape made no attempt to get them to quiet down, instead using the opportunity that presented itself when Hermione glared at him.

_Legilimens_ Snape returned her glare for several seconds as he filtered through her memories at a furious pace, searching for anything to do with the Headmaster. Finally finding a recent one, he pulled it to the front and viewed it without really comprehending it.

He blinked, trying to process the memory of her memory, and when he finally did it took all of his self control to keep from Flooing right to the Headmaster's office and giving him a piece of his mind.

Since that was not an option, he gave Hermione the full weight of his patented glare and waved his wand at the board.

"You will attempt to brew this potion in class; I expect your homework on my desk before you begin."

As one, the class erupted into motion, desperate to begin the complicated potion to give them at least a few moments to try to comprehend what they were trying to do.

Snape went right to his desk, silently fuming. _The nerve. The pure Gryffindor nerve of them! Bloody interfering old fool. He knows perfectly well that I have too much to do, and far from helping me lessen the load, now I have to babysit another Gryffindor. And the girl! She has the audacity to think she can actually help me just because she spent the summer at Headquarters and the rest of the staff fawns over her. The bloody fool! What does he think will come of having a Gryffindor Prefect, one of the Golden Trio, no less, help me. What will the Slytherins think? Bloody hell how would I explain that to the Dark Lord?_

He pinched the bridge of his nose in a vain attempt to stave off the mounting headache he could feel and sent the parchments off to the side with a wave of his wand. He stood and walked menacingly through the room, overseeing their attempts at the Potion.

For fear of doing something he might later regret, he stayed away from Hermione, but found extra delight in mocking the Boy-Who-Lived and his sidekick, as well as Longbottom.

He finally got his chance when he saw the Know-It-All helping Longbottom in one of the more complicated steps of the potion.

"Miss Granger" he said loudly, causing several students to jump. She met his gaze a little guiltily.

"Detention. Remain after class." Was all he said, _let her panic a little._

The rest of the class crawled by with several furious glares from Potter and Weasley, but Snape had no trouble ignoring them. When the class finally ended he was annoyed to see that they remained back with Granger.

He glared at them, "Leave. Now." They shot one last glance at their friend and then left, probably just waiting down the hall to hear all about how much of a pain Snape was.

"Miss Granger. Look at me, girl" his tone, however, made her flinch and look back down again. "I know what you and the Headmaster are planning."

That caught her attention and she looked up fearfully. "I will only say this once. I do not want, nor require, your help. Your presence would only complicate the matter and under no circumstances would I welcome your help. Am I clear?"

She nodded her head a little. "Good. Then get out." She moved to the door and paused.

"My detention, Professor?" she asked reluctantly.

He answered her tiredly, "Unless you want one I suggest you leave now."

He waited until he heard the door close and then went into his chambers and personal lab, pulling out a piece of parchment as he went.

_The Dark Lord will want these potions the next time he summons me, I was lucky he didn't ask for them last time._

He began to prepare the ingredients for the potions and set up the cauldrons. Rubbing his eyes with the heels of his palms, he forced himself to focus on the task at hand.

The poisons would take a day to brew, the acid would require two, and _damn,_ the Veritaserum would take roughly a month, depending on the full moon cycle, _and I'll need to brew an antidote in case he decides to test me. I don't have time for this!_

He finished setting up the cauldrons regardless. _Of course, I already have some Veritaserum handy, but it's for the Order and by making a new batch I can delay the Dark Lord from having it for a time._

He worked relentlessly, getting everything prepared, but not starting anything since he still had a full day of teaching ahead of him.

"Severus?" he heard a voice from the Floo and walked over to see Poppy's head in his fireplace.

"Yes?" he asked, doing his best to mask his tiredness for fear that the matron would cluck over him.

"I have a list of potions that the Hospital Wing is running low on and will need to be replenished if you have the time."

He heard her silent question and answered brusquely, "Of course I have time, Poppy. Send the list through."

She didn't appear convinced, but had long ago learned her lesson about arguing with Severus, and a moment later a rather lengthy list appeared in his fireplace. He grabbed it quickly and bid her farewell.

_Hell and damnation I certainly don't have time for this. But if I don't get them done then Poppy will investigate and I can't have that._

He ran a hand through his hair and set up his classroom for the next class, Gryffindor and Ravenclaw fourth years. _Colin Creevey is almost as bad as Longbottom. Except that there's no one to catch his mistakes like Granger does for Longbottom._

Sighing again, he waved his wand and the instructions for the potion appeared on the board as the students began to filter in. The students, after having suffered four years of potions, had become somewhat attune to the many moods of the Potions Master, and were more subdued than usual. He credited it to the Ravenclaws, because the Gryffindors were not intelligent enough to alter their actions to benefit themselves and not anger him.

Half an hour later saw many of the potions in the correct stage, but Snape noticed, as he looked around the room from his position in the front, that the Creevey boy's potion was not even close to what it should have been. As he moved forward to berate the boy, he saw Creevey drop in another ingredient, and noticed immediately that it was not the correct ingredient, but rather a volatile look alike.

Cursing under his breath he erected a Shield Charm between the students and the cauldron only seconds before the cauldron exploded. Snape himself, however, was left unshielded and was hit with several pieces of burning cauldron and splattered with the potion. He fell to the ground from the force and lay stunned momentarily.

The room held its breath, shaken by the explosion and the Potions Master's sudden shield, as well as scared of his reaction. Snape paused to catalogue his injuries before moving to sit upright. His head was pounding and he could feel the burning potion seeping through his robes and burning his skin.

He could hear one of the Ravenclaws, the Brennan girl, calling him, "Professor?"

He bit back a groan and moved to stand, holding on to his desk for support. "Class dismissed. Fourteen inches on the correct procedure and ingredients for this potion to be on my desk for the next class."

The students left quickly, Colin was the last to leave, so stunned was he that he didn't have detention or lose any points. Instead of joining his classmates outside, however, he went to the Hospital Wing to inform Madam Pomfrey that Professor Snape might need her help.

When Creevey finally left, Snape made a beeline for his rooms and went straight to his bathroom, stripping of his ruined robes and clothes and getting into a cool shower. He remained in the cold water for only a few minutes, just to ensure that the potion was washed off and then stepped out.

Looking in the mirror he noticed that there was an angry red mark forming near his scalp and several others on his shoulders and chest. _Bloody Gryffindors. These are sure to be bruises later. _He put a Glamour Charm on his head wound, but left the others alone since he could cover them up.

Walking out in his towel, he went to retrieve a new set of clothes and robes and dressed himself once more before returning to his living room. He contemplated going into his lab when he heard someone calling his name. Glancing at the Floo and finding it empty, he went through a door adjoining him to his classroom and found Poppy bustling around the room.

"Severus are you alright" she asked worriedly.

"Of course" he said silkily as he began waving his wand to clean up the classroom. "What makes you think otherwise?"

She gestured around the room, "This for a start."

He just shrugged, "Potions explosions are common, Poppy. I am more than capable of handling them."

She looked furious, "Well Mr. Creevey came to me not too long ago and said that you were the only one who was injured in the explosion, so I ask again. Are you alright?"

He did not pause in his spells to clean up the mess, "Yes, Poppy, I am fine."

"Then what happ-"

"Mr. Creevey," Snape cut across her. "Added a volatile substance to his potion that had an adverse reaction almost instantaneously. When I noticed this I put up a shield charm to protect the students, but the explosion occurred before I could shield myself. I will have minimal bruising and I would appreciate being left alone, Poppy."

She smiled indulgently, more than familiar with his moods, and did not take his tone to heart. "Very well Severus. I commend your actions and thank you for sparing several of them trips to the Hospital Wing."

She turned to leave and Snape waited until the door closed before returning to his almost restored classroom. Looking at the time he decided that brewing would have to wait, and sat at his desk, pulling out a stack of essays to grade.

Despite the work he got done before, the stack of essays had piled up and he was only able to make a small dent in them before he was required to show his face in the Great Hall for lunch.

Resolved to get out as soon as possible, he sat down and helped himself to a small amount of food. The other Professors slowly filed in and McGonagall and Dumbledore came in next to last, talking in low tones. McGonagall shot a worried glance at him and he could not check his response in time to hold back a glare at Poppy who was sitting at the other end of the table. Poppy, however, did not have the grace to look embarrassed and returned his glare, though it was not as intimidating.

"Severus, I heard there was an explosion this morning" Dumbledore said carefully as he helped himself to some food.

"If Poppy had bothered to tell you the whole story, you would have heard that none of the students were injured and therefore it's not worth worrying about."

McGonagall glared at him now, "'Not worth worrying about?' Severus, she told us that you were hurt. Why didn't you let her help you?"

"The damage was minimal; I had already taken care of it when Poppy barged in." He avoided looking at the Headmaster, knowing he would most likely see through his Glamour.

Instead he looked at the four House tables, checking for the usual students, and noticing that Mr. Creevey and several other fourth year Gryffindors were attracting a lot of attention at their table, and as one, several heads turned in his direction before looking hurriedly down at their table. He snorted and returned his attention to the scant amount of food on his plate.

"Headmaster I have several things I must attend to" he said quickly, getting up from the table and leaving before the older wizard could protest.

McGonagall watched him go and turned to Dumbledore, "He needs help and I'll have none of your excuses. That man is running himself into the ground and hardly anyone is lifting a finger to help him."

"My dear, I don't know what to do. As you well know he will hardly tolerate anyone interfering."

"I don't care, Albus" she whispered furiously. "He is _your_ spy. Not You-Know-Who's, not the Order's, not this school's, yours. You need to help him. Because Merlin knows that's the reason that he's so rundown. And he is alone. Yes it's partly his own doing, but you are more than happy to leave him be when he should forced to take care of himself."

It hurt McGonagall to see her words sinking in with the aged Headmaster, but no one else was stepping up and it was high time that someone took matters up with the Headmaster.

"Hem hem" McGonagall turned her head so quickly that it hurt.

"Headmaster," Umbridge began. "I wanted to inform you that I will begin evaluating the Professors tomorrow. I gave them a week to get into their schedules, so I expect them to be ready. I will be setting up my schedule and giving the Professors their appointment times after dinner so they won't have an excuse to not perform to their top standards."

"Of course, Dolores. I am sure the Professors will perform spectacularly" Dumbledore smiled.

Back in the dungeons, Snape began brewing the poisons and set up the beginning stages for the acid. _I'll wait to start the Veritaserum until Sunday, a week before the full moon. _Since he had a free period after lunch he was able to complete the brewing steps necessary for the three poisons that Voldemort had requested, and get to the second stage in the acid, which would need to boil overnight and be finished around lunchtime tomorrow.

Noticing he still had half an hour until his next, and last class, of the day, he began to set up the cauldrons for the potions that the Hospital Wing would need. He decided to brew the more complicated and time consuming ones tonight because he suspected that he would need something to lose himself in after his talk with the Headmaster.

His class of Slytherins and Ravenclaws went smoothly and he was grateful for a relatively quiet class. Unknown to most, the two Houses were usually able to work well together, since Ravenclaws valued intelligence and Slytherins prided themselves on using their intelligence to benefit themselves. Admittedly it wasn't the best relationship, but of the three Houses, Slytherins got along best with Ravenclaws.

He dismissed his class and double checked that the potions that were brewed that day were secure in the student cupboard, then he set a light ward on the classroom and made his way to the Headmaster's office.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sirius was pacing the room again. _I can't believe I apologized to that grease ball. If I stay here any longer with no news I will finally go mad. Ah! This is so frustrating. I can't do anything to help, I've made it harder for the Order because I acted foolishly and I can't bear to imagine what they're thinking. They all shared the pain I felt when Voldemort tried to get into my mind- that damn spell is as useful as it is harmful. Snape mentioned that it's almost the full moon- I should be at Headquarters to help Remus. His transformations are so hard on him and he's been taking longer to recover after each moon. Damn it! And Harry! I hope he doesn't know that I'm a prisoner. I would never forgive myself if something happened to him because of me._

He checked his more destructive impulses, remembering that he had already broken some of Snape's things in his earlier anger. _I need to speak with him again. _He glanced at the clock, _I can wait until later. The last thing he needs is his House Elf popping in during a class._

Sighing he sat down with his head in his hands, trying to plan what he would ask the Potions Master.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Licorice Wand" Snape grumbled to the gargoyle. He moved quickly up the staircase to find the Headmaster waiting for him at his desk.

As Snape opened his mouth to question Dumbledore's sanity in regards to Miss Granger, the old wizard held up his hand.

"You have undoubtedly discovered my ill concealed plan and wish to calmly explain why you disagree with my decision-" Snape snorted at his choice of words "-but I am afraid that will have to wait. We have important matters to discuss and then I will give you all the time you require."

Slipping into his role as a spy, Snape composed himself and began, "Last night I was summoned to the Dark Lord. Upon arriving, he revealed that Avery had located Potter's relatives and had brought them to the meeting. They were killed relatively quickly but they did suffer before they passed. I do not know how Avery found them, or how he got past the wards, but I don't think he was alone in this venture. He is strong, but not strong enough to break blood wards. I don't think they were overtaken in their own home, more likely they were overheard in public discussing Potter and Avery moved in to take them. Regardless, with their death the protections on the house are rendered null, so Potter cannot return there this summer."

"This is troubling indeed. I know that Harry didn't particularly get along with his relatives, but he will no doubt blame himself for their deaths and he is left alone once again. I am certain that he will be welcome at the Burrow this summer, but I think it would be safer to keep him at Headquarters" Dumbledore looked to see what Snape thought.

"Potter is not capable of spending the summer at Headquarters without whining about being left in the dark. He will insist to be included in more of the Order's business and he is not mature enough to handle that kind of information" Snape tried to leave his usual biting tone out in order to make the Headmaster see that he was serious.

"You don't give him enough credit Severus-" Snape opened his mouth to disagree but Dumbledore held up his hand again. "-but I believe you are right. Unless he proves himself ready, he won't be able to help the Order at all this summer. We will decide that later, though."

Snape nodded as the subject was closed. "I wasn't able to tell you sooner or at the meeting last Friday, but the reason I was delayed was that there was an attack on the Bones' (1)."

Dumbledore started, "I hadn't heard anything about that. What happened?"

"Amelia agreed with me that secrecy was important; we didn't want other Order members panicking and thinking that their houses were unsafe and flocking to our limited number of safe houses. I learned that night that there was to be an attack on Amelia's brother's family. I was able to stay behind, pretending that I needed to finish a potion for you. Several others remained behind as well. The attack was small and meant to be a warning to Amelia. I was able to Portkey away once I was back at Hogwarts and warn them before the Death Eaters arrived. I had to return to the Dark Lord and pretend that I had been in my rooms the whole time" Snape grimaced at having to talk so much.

"And the wound we saw that night?" Dumbledore asked. "Was it a result of Tom's displeasure at the mission's failure?"

Snape nodded,"Headmaster, we will need to stage a memory for me to present to the Dark Lord. I was lucky last night that he did not ask me about the Occlumency shields, but I fear I will not be so lucky twice."

Dumbledore pushed aside his rising sadness and unease, "What do you need?"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Snape returned to his rooms later that night, having skipped dinner in favor of finishing the poisons for the Dark Lord. He found Oreo waiting near his fireplace.

"Oreo?" he asked tiredly.

"Mister Black would like to speak with you" the elf hesitated before continuing. "He says to tell you that it is not urgent but he would like to talk to you tonight."

Snape blinked in surprise, _first he apologizes and is civil and now he's being considerate?_

"Inform Black that I must finish a potion but I will speak with him within the hour." He watched as Oreo popped away and then went straight to his lab.

All three poisons were near complete; two had one more ingredient to be added before they needed to be bottled immediately, while the third had twenty more minutes of simmering before it was complete.

He bottled the two poisons, putting aside two vials to bring to the Dark Lord the next time he was summoned, and put the rest in his warded cupboard. He checked the last poison once more, ten minutes, and the acid was progressing nicely.

He decided to take a shower while he waited for the poison to finish simmering. He put his robes aside and stripped of his clothes, wincing slightly as his shirt tugged at the welts on his chest. What were only red marks this morning were now raised welts of newly bruising skin. He noticed that they broke the skin in some places and removed the Glamour on his face. Glancing carefully at his scalp, he saw that it was more of a lump than anything else, and that it too, had broken the skin.

He stepped into the shower, reveling in the warm water, and scrubbed his weary body clean. Stepping out he felt a little better and redressed himself, leaving off his vest.

Walking back into his lab, he carefully produced a special vial to bottle the acid in and Vanished the rest. He put these, and the four vials containing the poisons, on his desk near his fireplace, and then retrieved the Portkey.

Whispering the password, he opened his eyes to find himself in his rooms in Voldemort's lair. He found Black sitting on the couch in the main room and walked forward.

"Well Black, what is it this time?" He saw Sirius turn to see him and then stand. He stayed where he was on the other side of the room, but Black moved closer, sitting on the back of the couch.

What he said first was not what Snape expected, "Merlin Snape, what happened to you?"

"What do you mean?" he spat, not in the mood for Sirius' tricks.

"To start how about the huge lump on your forehead? And you look like you haven't slept in days" Black commented.

Snape swore, furious with his carelessness, _how could I forget to reapply the Glamour? I need to pay more attention or it could cost me._

He waved his wand as he spoke, hiding the bruise and his fatigue behind another Glamour, "It's nothing, a student exploded their cauldron earlier."

Sirius remained quiet, having gleaned far more than Snape realized from his last comment, _Snape would have to be pretty tired to not notice a student screw up that badly and then get caught in the explosion. He's obviously got too much on his plate._

"What did you need Black? I'm busy" Snape stared at the Animagi.

"I get the impression that I'm going to be here for a while. I would-" he paused and took a deep breath. "-I would appreciate if I was kept informed as to the Order and Harry."

Snape cocked his head to the side and stared at him. "What?" he asked defensively.

"I'm trying to decide who is Polyjuiced to look like Sirius Black" he deadpanned.

"Ha-ha, very funny Snape. With nothing else to do here but read and think-" he pointed a warning finger at Snape. "-don't say anything." Snape held up his hands in mock surrender.

"With nothing else to do I've realized that I haven't been entirely fair to you and I haven't exactly been a role model for Harry. And it is entirely within my control to be more civil with you" He flashed a smile. "Plus, being nicer seems to get me the information I want."

Snape just stood in shocked silence. "How-" he coughed, _don't stutter!_ "I am not entirely convinced that you've changed your entire view of me in less than four days." He glanced at the clock. "Though I am loathe to do it, I will remain here for the next hour to ensure that you're not Polyjuiced, and then I 'fill you in' as you put it."

Sirius groaned, although he could hardly blame the man for being paranoid. His own change in outlook surprised him and admittedly, it was rather sudden. These thoughts had been constantly hounding him since he had been transferred to Snape's care, but it was seeing the spy just moments ago that made everything clear to him.

Just seeing Snape unmasked, as it were, really set everything into proportion. The fact that he looked so exhausted, as well as his apparent carelessness during the potions accident and in forgetting to apply the Glamour made it obvious to Sirius that the spy was reaching his limits, and Sirius himself was part of the cause of Snape's problems.

Thinking back, he recalled the night that he saw witnessed first hand a small portion of what Snape had to go through in order to get information for them. He remembered with shame how he had treated the man earlier, and how it was entirely his fault that the spy had left the meeting early.

"Snape" Sirius hedged, unsure if the spy wanted to talk to him or just sit in silence for the next hour.

He didn't answer but he did meet Black's eyes and incline his head. "The night of the Order meeting. What happened?"

"Just a mission gone awry, Black. The Dark Lord was displeased" Snape walked over to a chair and sank into it.

In turn, Sirius swung his legs over the couch and landed with a light 'thud.' "Will you tell me at the end of the hour? Provided I am who I say I am?"

Snape eyed him carefully, "I will consider it."

After only a few minutes of silence Sirius stood and began pacing the room.

"Must you do that?" Snape asked, although not angrily.

Sirius looked up, almost surprised to find that he was standing and halfway across the room. "I-" he threw his arms up. "Damnit Snape, I spent twelve years in a cell in Azkaban." He turned his back to the wall and slowly slid down so he was sitting on the floor, with his hands cradling his head once more.

"I spent _twelve years_ in a cell. I barely had enough room to stretch my legs. Then I escaped, and spent that year and the next year on the run, hiding out wherever I could. I spent most of my time in my Animagus form. And then I was stuck in my family's house. I've hated that house, what it symbolized, since I was a child, and I was stuck in there. And now-" He stood suddenly and turned to punch the wall. "Now-" punch "-I'm-" punch "-a-" punch "-fucking-" punch "-prisoner-" punch "-again!"

Unnoticed by Sirius, Snape had crossed the room to stand next to him, and lowered his arm after he had punched the wall for the last time. He wordlessly guided Black to the couch and pushed him down.

He went to the cupboard in his bathroom, unwarded it, and pulled out a weak Sleeping Potion and a Pain Relieving Potion. Mindful of his previous bouts of carelessness, he warded the cupboard once more and returned to the couch.

He handed both potions to Black, "You can take them both at the same time. I would recommend the Pain Reliever first," he pointed to the blue potion. Then he sat back down in his chair.

After Black had swallowed both potions Snape spoke, "I gave you a sleeping draught as well. I don't believe you're Polyjuiced, but you're obviously in no shape to ask any intelligent questions tonight. I will return tomorrow night."

He waited and watched as Black tried to fight through the potion, but eventually succumbed to sleep. He stood and pulled out his Portkey, muttering, "You've given me more to think about than I care to admit."

He returned to his rooms, glancing at the clock, and set a charm to alert him when forty minutes had passed. _Even with that rather convincing emotional outburst, I want to be sure that it's Black there. And going back when he's unconscious will allow me to bulk up the wards without him bothering me._

Forty minutes later found him sitting at his desk, staring at the same essay he had been staring at when he first sat down. Sighing he pulled out his Portkey once more and returned to his rooms.

He found Black in exactly the same position he left him, and it was unmistakably Black, _it's been much longer than an hour, and there's no way that he could have regained consciousness with the potion._

He began by checking each ward, and noticed immediately that someone had tried, and failed, to break some of them. He was faintly alarmed, until he determined that they didn't break even the weakest ward, and had only tested them. _Still, better to be safe_ he thought as he added several more wards, these designed to keep out even animals. He had designed that one with Pettigrew in mind. _The last thing I need is that rat getting through and finding or hearing something that was better left undiscovered._

Satisfied with his wards he began to say his password when something- he didn't know what- made him pause. Looking over at Black, he saw the man was sitting on the couch, and thought asleep he looked rather uncomfortable.

Scowling the entire time and wondering what was wrong with himself, he used a quick levitating charm to turn Black on his side to lie on the couch. He absolutely refused to drape a blanket over him; instead he started a small fire.

Muttering under his breath, he left his rooms behind to once again find himself in the dungeons.

It wasn't until Snape lay down to finally sleep that he realized that he had never gotten the chance to talk Dumbledore out of making Miss Granger his assistant.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

What do you think? I realize that Sirius kinda changed his tune rather drastically and in a very short amount of time, but he never seemed to be someone who took his time and really thought things through. With nothing else to do but reexamine his memories and talk to Snape, I think it's only logical that several things that he had previously ignored would become obvious to him. Besides, he is solely dependent on Snape now, and it is in his best interest to act more civilly towards him.

If you really disagree with me let me know and I'll see if I can explain my reasoning a little better.

Here's the (very basic) timeline I promised:

Day 1- Friday August 29th- Order meeting, Sirius captured

Day 2- Sat Aug 30th- Sirius discovered missing, mental barriers for Order first tested

Day 4- Monday Sept 1st- First day of school, Umbridge arrives

Day 8- Friday Sept 5th- Snape summoned- takes 'custody' of Sirius

Day 9- Sat Sept 6th- brews Wolfsbane, Bellatrix tries to get to Sirius

Day 10- Sun Sept 7th- tests Cruciatus potion on himself, Dumbledore decides to let Hermione help Snape, Dursleys die

Day 11- see above chapter.

If anyone is interested I can continue the timeline with the addition of each chapter, but this was just for people who didn't want to reread the last four chapters.

(1)- If you've read 'Hope' sorry to repeat an idea, but I rather like it. Amelia Bones is unmarried, but she has a brother, Edgar, who is married to Katherine. In canon they have one known daughter, Susan, but I've added a younger sister, Kali.

Thanks for reading and I would love to hear from you!

Always,

Sinkme


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Thank you to all of my reviewers and everyone who added the story/author alert or favorite- I live on your support!

Attyfan, wildtaz2go, excessivelyperky, linoria, arabellakye, cascade (anon), sonia120462, klester (anon), young-and-free, wickedmagic, dverducci, jessie145, greengirl6, gemini artemis, jackline, skaterkep, dizziefan1, writergirlAD, elf (anon), InvaderV.A.M, Onatah1

Note: A couple of readers have been concerned about future relationships and I wanted to clear this up now. **This will not be a Snape/Hermione pairing. This will be a Snape/Hermione friendship**- that's why they're listed as the two main characters. I know right know she's been next to zero in this story but we're looking long term here, people. Sorry for the confusion.

Maintenance:

_Thought_

"Normal speaking"

"_Spell"_

_Nonverbal Spell_

"_Parseltounge"_

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Snape had been finally getting the sleep he so desperately needed when he was thrown awake and put on full alert as a soft 'pop' reached his ears. His wand was trained on the sound and a curse on his lips even before his mind had comprehended that he was awake.

"Master Snape put your wand down" Winky huffed, indignant that he had almost hexed her.

He blinked, taking in the scene before him, and then lowered his wand, managing to not look embarrassed. "Winky" he said crossly. "What is it?"

"The Headmaster is needing you, sir" she replied, her own ire at the Headmaster's command leaking through.

Snape allowed himself to fall back onto his bed in a rare show of exhaustion. Hearing Winky move closer he held out his hand to stop her and stood tiredly. "Thank you Winky. Please inform the Headmaster that I will be there shortly."

Winky harrumphed but went to deliver his message and the Potions Master walked over to the other side of the room. Trading his sleeping clothes for his usual black pants and white shirt, he made his way over to the Floo.

Pausing momentarily, he turned around and went the bathroom to peer in the mirror. Scowling lightly at the dark circles under his eyes and the bruise near his scalp, he put another layer on his Glamour charm, hoping that the Headmaster would take the hint and not mention it.

Only then did he go back to the Floo and throw in some powder, calling out "Headmaster's office."

He emerged from the Floo desperate to show the man in front of him just how tired he was, but knowing that it would only fuel the Headmaster's insistence that he needed help.

And consequences be damned, Severus Snape did not need help.

_I'm perfectly capable of driving myself to the brink of death without a fifth year Gryffindor's help. _He clamped down on the snort he wanted to give and looked to the Headmaster.

"I am deeply sorry to disturb you, my boy" Although to Snape's eye he didn't look sorry at all. "I was able to keep the Dursley's deaths from being plastered all over the _Prophet._ I will need to break the news to Harry soon." The Headmaster turned to glance at Fawkes and was silent for several minutes.

Snape looked at him incredulously, "But…" he prompted, his anger steadily climbing that that was why the old wizard had gotten him out of bed.

"But I talked to Amelia and it seems that you left out a few details about the magnitude of the attack" The Headmaster peered over his spectacles to look at the man.

He continued, "Apparently she had been visiting her brother and his family that night and the five of them were meant to be killed while Amelia watched before she was finally tortured for information." He paused to gauge Severus' reaction. "And she knew this because she was there, with you, of course, when the Death Eaters were there.

"She told me how you had come bursting in with no preamble, were almost hit with several spells before Amelia recognized you. You gave Edgar and his family a Portkey to take them to safe house three, but before you could make another for Amelia you felt the Death Eaters closing in. So you Disillusioned the both of you and waited in a corner of the room while the Death Eaters ranted about their failed plans. Then you told her not to say anything about the attack and vanished with your own Portkey."

Severus, who had remained silent for the whole thing, now spoke, "As I said, unimportant details. I gave you the general outline, which was all that was important. Why did you feel the need to wake me up for that?"

Dumbledore peered at him sadly over his spectacles, "Oh my boy" he sighed. "If you consider those unimportant details then we need to have a serious conversation."

"Speaking of Sirius," Snape changed topics quickly. "What do you want me to do with the mutt?"

Dumbledore stiffened infinitesimally before carefully responding, "How long do you think you can hold off Voldemort before he becomes too suspicious? Sirius is too important, to the Order and to Harry, to abandon to death-"

Snape's jaw tightened as he fought to hold his self control and remain silent as the Headmaster continued, although he noticed Snape's tenseness. "But just as certainly, we cannot expose the Order's secrets. The barriers will withstand any more attacks from Voldemort, but at the cost of the sanity of several of the Order's best. We cannot allow that to happen."

Dumbledore looked at Snape curiously, "But you already know this." Snape nodded. "So you wanted to see how I would respond." Again Snape nodded. "And? Did you find out what you wanted to know?"

Snape knew that even though he had been found out his overall goal was safe; Dumbledore knew he had been searching for something in the answer that had been provided to him, but he didn't know what it was.

Regardless, Snape did not hear what he wanted to hear. _That was exactly the answer I expected to hear, however. Concern for the Order, for those members who are connected to the mental barriers, for Potter, for Black, but not for me. _

Instead of answering, Snape diverted the question. "Just as you knew my purpose you must surely know that I would not answer you."

Dumbledore nodded, although he didn't look pleased, "I am assuming, however, that you have a plan, Severus?"

Snape scowled, "Of course. I will just have to endure until it can come to fruition. And no-" he could see Albus beginning to form a question. "- there is nothing that can be done. The plan is entirely dependent on me and no outside force, including Miss Granger, will speed it along" he sneered.

"We will get to that in a minute, my boy" Dumbledore assented. "But you said you suspect Voldemort will summon you soon and expect you to have access to the secrets that Sirius has."

Snape hesitated, _It's actually part of my plan that I am summoned and will be unable to break the Order's barriers. Potion aside, I won't be able to convince the Dark Lord of Black's worthlessness for several weeks, at least a month. But I will need to get back in his good graces somehow before they decide to let someone else, particularly Bellatrix, kill him…_

"I might be wrong, Headmaster. I will, of course, keep _you_ informed" Snape said easily.

Dumbledore heard the not so subtle jibe, "Did you expect me to sit back and watch as you continue to push yourself to death Severus? I do not regret going behind your back on this issue. At least give her a chance, she is very bright-"

"No!" Snape exclaimed, intent on ending this idea now. "She is also a fifth year Prefect, a Gryffindor, and one of Harry Potter's closest friends. How exactly did you think this would help me?" he demanded furiously.

"You may, of course, tell Voldemort that I forced her on you, you can blame it on my blind favoritism of Gryffindors and the 'Golden Trio' and no one will question you further" Dumbledore answered glibly.

"Are you daft?" Snape was furious now. "You would endanger her for something as menial as stocking the potions cabinets?"

"Endanger? My boy, I trust you to keep yourself in che-"

"Do you really think the Dark Lord would allow this opportunity to pass?" He smacked his hands down on the Headmaster's desk, decorum and self control lost on him. "Are you so blind as to think for one minute that he would let that girl- knowing full well who she is and how important she is to Potter and to the Order- work so closely with me for an extended period of time and not order me to arrange for her to 'accidentally' touch a Portkey and be whisked away to his hideout? Did you really think that I would be able to protect her by simply claiming that she was 'helping me?' Or was this perhaps an ill-guided venture to unburden my _soul_? Even you cannot be so naïve, Albus, as to believe that that _girl_ would ever-"

"Enough!" Dumbledore said sharply. And Snape stopped at once, looking angrily at the Headmaster.

"You've made it clear to me that there is more to my proposal than I had considered. The issue remains, however- you are spread too thin and the things that demand your attention often do not receive it, through no fault of your own."

Snape's tone was less biting when he answered, "I am not nearly as overburdened as you are imagining, Albus."

"Please, Severus, you may not like what I have said, but do not lie to me. Minerva has noticed as well- you attend few meals and eat little when you are there. And I can see through your Glamour-" Snape barely resisted raising his eyebrow at this. "-you look as if you have not slept in days, although tonight is entirely my fault. At the very least, let Miss G- let _someone_ help you."

Snape favored the Headmaster with a long look, his black eyes reflecting nothing of what he was really feeling at the moment, and when he spoke, his voice was back to the detached calm it usually was, "But Albus, there is no one who can help me."

He briefly bowed his head, and then went through the Floo in a whirl of green flames.

Dumbledore just sat at his desk, saddened beyond words at the man who had just left his office. _"…no one who can help me."_ As painful as the words had been, a direct challenge at the Headmaster himself, it was the tone that cut to Dumbledore's heart. _He didn't yell, or accuse, or even blame me, really. He stated it like he would anything else, because he believes as a fact that no one can help him. Not even me. _

He stared at the dying green flames, his resolve and willingness to help dwindling with the fire. Fawkes let out a mournful trill, and Dumbledore shook himself, unwilling to give up on his spy. He just needed a new plan, that was all…

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Snape returned to his quarters and stumbled back to his bed. He fell gracelessly on top, a testament to how exhausted he was, but his nerves and his temper would not let him sink back into the sleep he desperately needed. _Damn it Albus._

He ran his tongue over his teeth and grimaced, then made his way to the bathroom to give himself some semblance of life.

He heard a 'pop' in the next room and cursed. He took his time and eventually went out to meet Winky in the main room.

"Yes, Winky?" he drawled.

Winky frowned upon seeing Snape up and seemingly more awake than he had been during his meeting with the Headmaster. She held out a vial to him, "I brought you Dreamless Sleep sir. You is needing more sleep and no arguing."

"As much as I appreciate the gesture, Winky, I simply cannot go back to sleep" he said, though not unkindly.

"Yes you can, sir" Winky insisted, showing the stubborn streak she had picked up from the Potions Master. "Just take the potion and you can sleep."

He glared at her, "I did not mean that I couldn't go back to sleep so much as I won't go back to sleep. Now that I am up there are several tasks which I must complete."

"I will go fetch Madam Pomfrey-"

"She won't come down. Just leave me be, Winky."

"Professor Dumbledore would-"

"It's his fault I'm awake" Snape cut off another excuse.

Then Winky smiled, and Snape knew he wouldn't like what came next.

"I'll go get Professor McGonagall" Winky threatened.

And Snape was right. He hesitated in his answer for a moment, and Winky knew that she had him.

"I dare say I cannot stop you, Winky. Please, go wake up Minerva. I'm sure she will be delighted to be woken up in the middle of the night for something that isn't an emergency. After all, she reacted so well the last time…" Snape's cheshire grin looked very out place on his face.

Winky shuddered; the last time Minerva had been woken up in the middle of the night was by a house elf named Daisy. It was a tale passed on to new House Elves at Hogwarts; it had been just two years ago, and Daisy had overheard some students talking about a prank that they would be pulling on the Deputy Headmistress that night. Daisy, demonstrating her loyalty to the school, went to the Transfiguration professor's room that night to make sure that the prank could not take place.

But alas, McGonagall, upon awaking and seeing a strange figure at the foot of her bed, transfigured the elf into a brooch. Such was the strength of the spell that it could not be undone, and to this day, the brooch sits in McGonagall's room.

At least, that's how the story went…

Winky glared at Snape, "You are an evil man, sir." She 'popped' back out of the room and Snape let out a sigh, heading quickly into his classroom to grab several piles of essays. He stopped as he noticed a horribly pink scroll on his desk. He picked it up and noticed the equally pink bow that was fastened around it and the awful perfume that saturated the paper. Not in any mood for whatever it was, since it couldn't be important if it was pink, he muttered, _"Incendio"_ and watched in satisfaction as the scroll went up in flames. That done he made his way to a chair in the main room in his chambers.

He sat down tiredly, he muttered another spell and lit the fire to bring some warmth and light to the room. By this time in his time as a professor he could tell the essays apart just by looking at them who had put in the time and who had not. Of course, with the upper years he had the benefit of personal experience with their own styles, and as a result, he ended up reading few of the essays all the way through.

He viciously attacked a majority of the essays, regardless of year and House, with his spiky handwriting. All he had to do was make sure that the marks appeared throughout the essay and where the most obvious errors were, and most of his students would have no idea that he hadn't actually read their essay.

He did not feel guilty about it, or really even give it a second thought, since this was far from the first time that this grading method had been employed. He felt that if his students couldn't be bothered to put time and effort into their work, then he shouldn't waste his time grading it.

_Besides, I will need every free moment I have to work on the potion for Black. _

Rubbing his eyes with the heels of his palms, Snape stood slowly, giving his back and neck a moment to adjust to the change of position, and replaced the graded essays on his desk. _There is still the acid to complete for the Dark Lord and the poisons will need to be bottled. Albus finished the Wolfsbane, but I'll need to double check that it was stored properly and add some silver to any extra that was bottled to test the effects. The Veritaserum cannot be started until the next moon cycle. Ah, bloody hell, I will need to start the potions for the Hospital Wing or face Poppy's questions. That will be the first thing I start, as many of those can be completed in a short amount of time and the poison is near complete. _

Glancing at his clock he cursed the time and quickly strode out of the dungeons, making his way to the Great Hall for breakfast.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Hermione sat at the Gryffindor table that morning next to Harry and across from Ron. If either noticed that she was unusually quiet, they didn't say anything, but several glances were passed between the two boys.

"Ow!" Ron glared at Harry. "What was that for?"

Harry's head fell onto his chest and his hand came to his forehead, "Ron, you have no tact at all."

Hermione, however, had not noticed their antics. Instead, she was gazing interestedly at the Head Table, specifically at the just recently filled seat that the Potions Master occupied.

"Harry…" Hermione began, and then trailed off; almost unaware that she had addressed her friend at all.

"Hermione?" Harry turned to look at her. "Hermione." He shook her shoulder lightly.

Hermione brushed his hand off and turned to her friend, "Harry," she began in a whisper. "Does Professor Snape look alright to you?"

He looked at her incredulously, "Snape? Why would I care?"

Ron answered his rhetorical question, "If he's sick or something then he deserves it. But he'll be in a worse mood for class."

Harry groaned, but Hermione glared at them. "No, seriously. Look at him."

Ron shrugged and the two of them looked at the Potions Master. He was currently doing his best to ignore whatever Dumbledore was saying to him, but when they looked closer at him they had to agree with Hermione that something was wrong.

"Looks like he's half dead" Ron said with a surprisingly empty mouth. Hermione, however, was too distracted to notice that her friend suddenly discovered table manners.

"Yea, so what" Harry poked his food angrily.

Ron glared at Hermione, as if to say _now look what you've done_ and steered the conversation towards the upcoming Quidditch year. Hermione stayed silent, she never understood their obsession with the sport, and turned thoughtfully to her own food.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Severus, did you receive the time of your evaluation from Dolores?" McGonagall asked in hushed tones.

Snape looked confused for a moment, "Evaluations?"

McGonagall sighed disgustedly, "_Professor _Umbridge will be acting on behalf of the Ministry and evaluating each professor for competency over the next couple of weeks. It should have been on your desk this morning."

"Oh, that? Horrible pink scroll?"

McGonagall nodded.

"Pink bow around it?"

"Yes, Severus."

"Too much perfume?"

"Severus…"

"I burned it."

She bit back a burst of laughter and turned to look at him, "Severus, why did you do that?"

"It was pink" he said seriously.

McGonagall couldn't keep her laughter back at the young man's face and received several curious looks from both the students and the staff.

"So you don't know when you are scheduled?"

"No, it won't make a difference anyway. Any student would be able to tell her that I am not fit for education. Her opinion will not make a difference because it is Albus' wish that I remain at the school for now."

Minerva looked at him shrewdly, she didn't like this 'for now' business but she knew that he wouldn't answer and if she asked she would put him out of the semi good mood he was currently in.

Instead she turned the conversation to the upcoming Quidditch tryouts for each House.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"My Lord, if I may have a moment of your time…" Bellatrix kneeled down in front of Voldemort.

"Of course, dear Bella" with a wave of his hand the few Death Eaters who had been in the main hall left hurriedly.

"What do you need, Bella?" he asked softly.

"My Lord," she began hesitantly. "You know I am your dedicated servant, but I do not think that everyone is as dedicated."

"Yes, Bella. I know of your distrust. Dear Severus is a Slytherin in every aspect. But he has proven himself."

"Of course, My Lord. But with regards to my cousin, the prisoner you left in Snape's care, I fear that he is hiding something."

"Explain" he said roughly.

Bellatrix looked down, afraid to admit that she had gone against his orders, but she said, "I discovered that Snape's rooms have a large number of wards on them. Greater than they were before my cousin came into his care. I merely wonder why Snape is taking such care for a prisoner."

"Black is the most important prisoner I have at the moment. I commend Severus for understanding that and taking the necessary measures to ensure that Black remains alive and unharmed" Here he glanced at Bella, undoubtedly aware of what she had been doing near Snape's room.

"Never fear, dear Bella. Lord Voldemort will get to the bottom of this soon. Severus has a lot to answer for and he will not be able to talk his way out much longer."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

There you have it.

Sorry that nothing really happened, but I haven't really taken any time to develop or do anything with some of the characters and this is the buildup chapter to the next couple.

For the timeline: this chapter was the morning of Tuesday, September 9th and the next chapter will start later that night with Snape's talk with Sirius.

Thoughts and constructive critisms are appreciated!

Always

Sinkme


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

Look how fast I got this out!

Thank you to all of my reviewers and everyone who added the story/author alert or favorite- I live on your support! And cookies to everyone!

Attyfan, wildtaz2go, excessivelyperky, linoria, arabellakye, cascade (anon), sonia120462, klester (anon), young-and-free, wickedmagic, dverducci, jessie145, greengirl6, gemini artemis, jackline, skaterkep, dizziefan1, writergirlAD, elf (anon), InvaderV.A.M, Onatah1, Iva1201, Sonseeahray, ArcticSeasons, BuckeyeBelle, Raistlin24, lidiladilom, alienaileen, FireChildSlytherin5, kindli (anon), SilvaGirl, cloudsdriftby, The Ravenwolf, Sofia7, kittybloom21, Coconut Rum, ServalSpirit, KlingonGal8489

For anyone who reviewed I tried to PM you individually and to any anonymous reviewers who have questions or bring up good points I'll answer them below:

Kindli: Thank you so much for your reviews! I will definitely explain the Dursleys more in depth in later chapters, but for now I can tell you that they weren't in their house and I interpreted the blood ward as a protection for _Harry_ as long as he called 4 Privet Drive home. For the Dursleys I think it was more their anonymity and some of the charm that kept them safe. Daisy was just a random idea I had, like an urban legend for the school, I can almost guarantee that nothing will come from it. Can't make any promises in regard to character deaths, but every death will serve a greater purpose.

Skaterkep: Thanks for your support! As the war progresses things will only get tougher for Snape, meaning more meetings for both the Order and the Death Eaters. There's a good chance that the two will coincide again…

Maintenance:

_Thought_

"Normal speaking"

"_Spell"_

_Nonverbal Spell_

"_Parseltounge"_

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Bloody hell! Of all the times…" Snape cursed as he felt his muscles cramping at an alarming rate. He wobbled dangerously as his calf muscles locked in a tight contraction and then he fell hard on the floor in his chambers. He felt the muscles in his legs, arms, and back contract painfully, forcing his back to arch and his arms and legs to constrict.

Clenching his jaw tightly, as a result of the muscle cramps and an involuntary move on his own part to keep himself from screaming in pain he pushed his breath past his teeth. Hissing he sucked air back in and pushed it out again.

He was preparing himself to call Winky when he heard the house elf herself 'pop' into the room. "Sir your class is-" She broke off as she saw him.

"Sir! What happened?"

"Potions" he bit out in between harsh breaths. "Muscle relaxer. Top shelf. Green."

Winky hurriedly focused her elf magic and snapped her fingers, bringing the necessary potion flying to her. She quickly undid the stopper and tried to open the Potions Master's mouth.

"Sir, you is needing to open your mouth" she said tightly.

"Can't" was his reply.

If he wasn't in such a state she would have hit him on the head, but as it was she did her best to not look annoyed.

She moved to make an attempt to pour the potion down his throat and he shook his head violently.

"Stomach. Can't swallow" he began to wheeze from the lack of oxygen he was getting.

Winky's eyes narrowed, she had never done something like this before, but she knew that Snape needed her and he would be in too much pain to wait for Pomfrey to come down herself.

Concentrating on what she wanted to happen, she gathered her magic and focused on the potion in her hand. Snapping her fingers harshly she watched the potion disappear and a moment later Snape's body unclenched from the awful pose it had been stuck in and he took several large breaths.

She watched the man in front of her with a critical eye as he slowly got his legs under him and stood. "I will go dismiss the class, sir" she moved to the door.

"No, Winky. That won't be necessary" he said softly.

"Sir! You cannot be serious!" Winky was shocked.

"But I am. I will go teach my class and you will not mention what happened to anyone" he caught her eye, making sure that the order stuck. "You won't tell Headmaster Dumbledore, Professor McGonagall, Madam Pomfrey, any professor, student, house elf, ghost, portrait, or anyone of what just occurred."

He could see her searching for any loophole that he might have left by accident, but he knew that his order was sound and Winky 'popped' away looking furious and hurt.

_Damnit. I will have to explain it all to her later_. He took a couple of slow steps over to his potions cabinets and retrieved a pain reliever and two more muscle relaxers and put them in the protective pocket in the front of his robes.

_For now, though, I am late to my class._

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Professor Flitwick was not in a good mood. His third year class of Slytherins and Gryffindors were usually rowdy, and he was more than used to the usual tricks.

No, it was more due to the fact that his evaluation was today. He had the _honor_, as he discovered from polling the other professors, of being the first professor to be evaluated by the pink toad.

The students looked confused at their Defense teacher sitting in the back of the room, but most of them had no problems ignoring her. Flitwick stayed in the front of the class, prepared to carry his lesson on as usual and ignore the woman in the back as his students seemed to be doing.

He had heard from his students, always indirectly gleaning the information in the halls or during meals, that the pink woman was a horror as a teacher. Many complained about her teaching methods and said that they weren't actually practicing any spells.

As a newly inducted member of the Order, he should have been kept out of many of their secrets, but his long standing friendship with Albus and several other members, as well as his own accomplishments in Charms and dueling, had allowed him to enter the Inner Circle in a very short amount of time.

So it was that he knew the real reason that Umbridge was the Defense professor; Fudge was getting worried. Every wizard worth his wand knew that Dumbledore was ten times the man that Fudge was. What made it all worse, though, was that Fudge knew it as well.

This made him nervous, as he had only gained power by default, since Dumbledore had not taken it. He knew that his hold on the title of Minister was hanging by a thread. His administration just seemed to face problem after problem, and there was hardly a competent worker to be found when one was needed.

Flitwick now knew that the lack of qualified employees was likely done on purpose. Someone, most likely Lucius Malfoy, had ensured that the top jobs were occupied by pig-headed purebloods who knew less about their job and responsibilities than Flitwick knew what it was like to be tall.

But Fudge was desperate to keep his power, which forced him to make desperate moves. Like the one that had sent his Senior Undersecretary to be the Defense professor and High Inquisitor at Hogwarts.

_And I think she will turn out to be a bigger threat than Fudge, since for all her pomp she seems to have some kind of twisted intelligence._

He caught her looking at him and realized that his class had quieted down, waiting for him to start the lesson.

"Hello, everyone. We will briefly revisit the Banishing Charm…"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

At lunch Hermione looked again for the Potions Master, but he was conspicuously absent from the staff table. She sighed, wondering both at her own attitude and where the professor was. _And I don't have potions until tomorrow afternoon._

She had, of course, heard through the Hogwarts gossip mill that he had been twenty minutes late for his first class and once he had arrived he sat at his desk and instructed them sitting down. It was certainly noteworthy, and in Hermione's mind something that pointed to a more serious conclusion, that the professor had not swooped throughout the room during the class.

She knew that she would have to keep these thoughts to herself since Harry and Ron wouldn't appreciate it if she tried to talk about Harry's most hated professor twice in one day. _And_ she reflected with disgust. _Almost all of Gryffindor and probably Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw hold Harry's opinion of the man. _

She could honestly saw that she didn't hate Professor Snape. She was frustrated that he never acknowledged her, but she had started to view it as a challenge in her third year; her goal wasn't to get commended for her work, it was to not be mocked for it.

_And I was a snotty little upstart in my first and second year_ she almost snorted as she remembered the child she had been. _If it hadn't been for Harry and Ron-_

Her musings were cut short as she, and everyone else in the Great Hall, turned to look at the Staff table in curiosity.

"Isn't that Winky?"

Hermione nodded, surprised that Harry had remembered the elf's name.

"What's she doing?"

The question was uttered by dozens of students at each table, but no one had an answer. The elf had entered through the Staff door in the back and was now on the chair that the Professor Snape usually sat at for meals.

She appeared to be talking with Dumbledore, although she was shaking her head and moving her hands and ears more than she moved her lips.

Hermione kept her eyes on the Headmaster, watching his face freeze in shock and sadness for a moment. Then it seemed as if a great wave of calm smoothed out his features and he turned to look at the students, as if to reassure them. He stood and motioned to Professor McGonagall but he did not address the students, so many assumed that it was some 'official' school business to do with the house elves and returned to their conversations.

Hermione, though, couldn't shake the feeling of unease that filled her as she watched the Headmaster and his Deputy leave the Great Hall.

"Oi Hermione. You there?"

"Ron?"

"I was saying that we have Care of Magical Creatures next."

She smiled, "Yes. It will be good to see Hagrid."

Hermione returned to the conversation, storing away her fears for the moment.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Dumbledore watched in apprehension as Winky entered the Great Hall and made her way over to him. He did his best to not let his fears show, however, in order to keep the students unaware.

The little elf came to the chair on his left, where Severus usually sat, and stood carefully on it, ignoring the looks from students and staff alike.

"Professor Dumbledore, sir, I need to tell you something" she said, leaning towards the old wizard.

"Yes, Winky? Is Severus alright?" Dumbledore picked up on her movements and lowered his own voice.

"I cannot be saying, sir. But it would be a profitable line of inquiry" Dumbledore allowed himself a smile; only Severus would have a house elf that turned out like him.

"He's forbidden you to say anything, hasn't he?"

Winky's non-answer was all the confirmation he needed. "Thank you Winky. If you hadn't _not_ informed me I am sure I would have uncovered it eventually, but I appreciate you coming to me so soon."

Winky just nodded, unable to bring herself to talk because of Snape's orders.

She watched as the Headmaster waved Professor McGonagall over and the two of them leave the Great Hall, feeling much better.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

It was lunch, and as hungry as he was, Snape couldn't bring himself to leave his quarters. He was currently lying on his bed in complete darkness. That, along with the coolness of the dungeons, was functioning to relieve the pounding headache he had. He was attempting to sleep, but he found that his muscle contractions and cramps continued to persist, sometimes even through the potions he took.

So if he couldn't sleep, at least he would minimize the damage and keep himself from falling on the floor for the third time. The second time had been after his second morning class, right before lunch.

He had been returning to his quarters, just passing the desk in the main room, when his whole body began to seize. Unfortunately, the hard edge of the desk did little to cushion his fall and he now had a shallow, but long and bleeding, ragged cut down the middle of his chest and onto his stomach.

The cut ached, but it was nothing compared to the agonizing throbs of his muscles and joints from constantly cramping and being forced to uncramp.

_Damn the Cruciatus Curse and the Dark Lord to the deepest pit of hell._

Many people thought that the Cruciatus Curse was an Unforgivable because of the immense pain it caused. If he could have he would have laughed at them.

_Sure it causes awful pain, but it can only be applied in short bursts. Anything longer than three minutes is likely to send the victim to death or insanity. Most curses and even some hexes cause worse damage to the human body upon immediate application. A slicing hex in the wrong hands is much more deadly. The real reason that the Cruciatus is an Unforgivable is the pain it causes later. Prolonged exposure to that bloody curse permanently damages nerve endings and muscle cells. Seizures, loss of coordination, muscle cramps, the list goes on._

The symptoms, of course, didn't just pop up whenever they felt like it; certain triggers; lack of sleep, extreme stress, extreme cold or hot weather, for example, could all force the symptoms to become prevalent.

He cast a Tempus Charm and found that lunch was almost over. He stood slowly, giving himself plenty of time to move, and walked over to his closet, selecting a new white shirt to replace the wrinkled and slightly bloody shirt.

Buttoning it carefully and pulling his black vest over top he turned his head sharply, too sharply, as he heard two voices calling from the main room of his chambers.

_Out of the frying pan…_

He walked carefully to meet them, surprised and grateful that it had taken Winky so long to disobey his order. "Yes, Headmaster? What can I do for you?" he asked as smoothly as he could.

"Nothing special, dear boy. You were not at lunch and I though I would come check on you. Professor McGonagall wanted to come as well and I was hard pressed to deny her."

"Yes, indeed. After all, what are Minerva's wishes compared to my privacy?" Snape asked icily.

Neither took offense to his tone, however, and McGonagall spoke next, "You look rather pale, Severus. Are you feeling quite alright?"

"If you hadn't noticed, Minerva, I am always pale. I assure you I am feeling fine" his eyes narrowed to fix the Headmaster with a glare.

_If he knew anything specific he would have asked me by now, so Winky probably just encouraged him to check up on me. If I can hold on until they leave then I should be fine._

Already he was feeling rather light headed and did his best to shoo them away. "If there is nothing else, Albus, Minerva, I ask that you leave. I have several experimental potions that must be tended to."

Minerva was shooting him a disbelieving look when she saw him start to shake. "Severus?"

"My boy, what-"

Severus was doing his utmost to minimize his shaking in order to take the muscle relaxer, but his hand was jarring the potion too much for him to take the stopper out.

Minerva swiftly crossed the room and took the potion from his hand, alarmed at the rate at which the shaking was increasing. She carefully held his head as still as she could while she poured the potion down his throat.

He coughed several times, but almost immediately the shaking lessened, although it did not completely abate.

McGongall's hand moved to his shoulder, "Oh, Severus" she said softly.

He was coughing too much to glare at her, though she knew he wanted to.

She looked over to Albus, only to be completely shocked when she saw how he was looking at Severus. It couldn't be- anger!

"Severus" he said in a hard voice. "When did this start?"

Snape just shook his head, not even concerned with the Headmaster's tone. "It was too late even before this" he said calmly.

"What?" Minerva's hand tightened on his shoulder and he winced.

Snape turned his black eyes to Albus, "There's nothing to be done. It was better not to tell you."

"You didn't think I would care? That I could help?" Albus all but roared.

Now Minerva was frightened. "What is going on here?"

Snape just shook his head and Minerva looked imploringly at the Headmaster. Suddenly his face dropped and he looked old and sad beyond even his years.

"Due to his overexposure to the Cruciatus Curse, Severus' nervous system is deteriorating…" here Dumbledore looked at Snape. "How long?"

"To live?" Snape said bluntly. "I couldn't possibly guess. In itself this isn't an execution date, just a better chance at a death sentence. But I'm already died, and I'm living on borrowed time even now."

Minerva shook her head, tears forming in her eyes, "You're dying and you didn't think to tell me? To tell Albus? Poppy? She has to have-"

"Minerva" as usual his cold tone cut right through her panic to make her see the whole scenario. "Even if I told you, it wouldn't change anything. My _role_ is unchanged. Personal health be damned. And anything Poppy could give me is something I can and will brew to be more potent. It was better to leave it alone."

"And what will you do in the meantime?" Albus gazed at him with sad blue eyes. "Your classes. Potions. Spying. Living."

"The last doesn't concern me as much as the first three" Snape said brusquely and held up a hand to silence the beginning of Minerva's outburst. "I will manage. My classes will not be as demanding as the second two, for which I cannot afford even a single error. I believe I have a treatment that could work to diminish the larger muscle cramps, at which time the potions should be able to cover any minimal shaking and cramps."

Albus looked at the younger man critically before saying, "I will be covering your afternoon classes-" here he stopped Severus from arguing. "You suspect Voldemort will be calling you soon. Start your treatment, but if it doesn't work you will go see Poppy."

Severus nodded reluctantly, knowing that the Headmaster would not back down from this compromise, but also knowing that he would not go to Poppy even if his treatment failed.

The bell rang, signaling the end of lunch and McGonagall left Snape's quarters feeling as though none of her questions had been answered, and instead she had even more and a growing sense of unease concerning her colleague and friend.

Dumbledore moved to the Potions classroom while Snape moved into his private lab to complete Poppy's list of potions for the Hospital Wing. Although many were fairly basic and took little time to make, the sheer number that she needed kept him busy for the whole afternoon.

It was better that the potions were less demanding, since his hands and arms, as well as his legs, continued to shake slightly throughout the entire brewing process. He had finished the last potion, a Fever Reducer, and bottled and labeled the rest in his own spiky handwriting. He would have Winky deliver them to Poppy later.

For now, he had an hour until dinner, where his presence would be required, and decided to begin his idea for a treatment.

He snorted, _if I had a treatment I wouldn't be suffering from this right now. _Regardless, his plan should reduce the cramps and ease his pain.

_First off is a hot bath_. He cast a charm on the water to keep the water at the highest temperature he could tolerate and simply lay in it near twenty minutes.

The heat was so relaxing and he could feel his muscles unclenching and easing into their natural state. _I should see if there's a healing charm to channel this kind of relaxing warmth into muscles. Such a spell would be very useful. _

After he had toweled off and dressed in his customary clothes he went back out to the main room and lit a fire, sitting on the rug in front of the hearth. As the fire kept him pleasantly warm and his muscles were in a relaxed state, he slowly stretched out all of his muscles, working from his legs up.

The stretching would work out any lingering soreness or stiffness and hopefully prevent future cramps, but Snape held no hope for the last one.

He did, however, feel much better as he made his way to the Great Hall for dinner, and was able to eat a fair sized meal.

Returning to his quarters he was struck by an idea and threw some Floo powder into his fireplace.

"Lupin?" he called into the fireplace at 12 Grimmauld Place, thanking the Headmaster that he hadn't closed off the Firecalls to Headquarters.

He called a few more times until he heard Tonks answer. He almost groaned, not in any mood to deal with the young Auror, but she was better than Moody.

"I need to speak with Lupin."

"I'll, er- I'll go get him" she stuttered.

A moment later a rather rumpled looking Remus Lupin came in front of the fireplace. Snape raised an eyebrow but said nothing.

"Yes, Severus? Is it about the Wolfsbane?"

"No, your potion is done and waiting until Sunday. It's about the mutt."

With those words Lupin's whole demeanor changed. He eyed Snape distrustfully, "What's happened?"

"Nothing" Snape spat, starting to wonder why he had gone through with this idea. "He's been complaining non-stop for some news on the Order. I thought it would be better if I were to regulate his communications. That being said, I also think Potter would be suspicious if his dogfather didn't send him any letters."

Lupin looked at him in wonder, "You're saying Harry and I can write to Sirius and you'll deliver the letters to him? And that he can write back?"

"It will be easier on me if you can keep him informed. I would however, have to deliver the mutt's letters to you to pass along to Potter."

"Done. Severus, this is…I mean-" the werewolf looked much happier than he had earlier but Snape had already dismissed his attempt at gratitude.

"I'm doing this for myself" he sneered and ended the Firecall.

That accomplished, he retrieved his Portkey and went to his rooms in Voldemort's stronghold.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sirius woke up that morning and was mildly peeved with the Potions Master for drugging him, but after a couple more minutes he reflected that it was probably for the best.

Oreo came in later with breakfast and Sirius tried to talk to the house elf, but it was hard to carry on a conversation when they had nothing in common and Sirius didn't know of any polite conversation starters that didn't deal with the weather or recent news.

Since neither was an option to him, he passed through breakfast in silence and then went back to the couch. He was utterly and completely bored. Briefly he wondered what had become of his wand, since he left it at Headquarters, but he was sure that Remus would keep it safe for him.

He stood suddenly and began to pace the room again, desperate to be doing _something._ He had had enough of just sitting around. He walked into the bathroom and looked in the mirror critically.

He had been handsome as a student at Hogwarts; good looking and naturally athletic, he and James had kept in shape through Quidditch and running around in their Animagus forms.

Now, though, after twelve years in Azkaban, he had wasted away to the point where he could hardly recognize himself. He was pale and extremely thin, lacking the muscles that he had had as a teenager.

_I at least have enough room to do some exercises…_

He spent most of the afternoon stretching and doing any exercises that he could think of with his limited space. He wished he knew a form of martial arts, since there was probably enough room for him to practice by himself.

When his stomach grumbled he realized that he had worked right through lunch, and he called Oreo. As he sat eating he decided to look through the many book shelves that lined the main room. _There's gotta be something that I'll find interesting. _

He searched through several shelves, annoyed with the quantity of potions texts that were in them. He had almost given up when he came across a familiar title, although he had never actually read it.

Shrugging and taking the book off the shelf, he walked over to the couch and sat down to read _Hogwarts, A History._

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Snape looked around as he touched down in his room, spotting Sirius on the couch. Seeing the other man arrive, Sirius put down the book he was reading, which Snape noticed with a smirk, and stood to face him.

Sirius scratched the back of his neck in a nervous gesture, "So…thanks for last night."

Snape just nodded, "Was there something you wanted to ask me?"

"Yea. I'm going to be here for awhile, aren't I?" Sirius seemed resigned.

And suddenly, the animosity, the anger and awful desire for revenge that usually accompanied his interactions with Black seemed to lessen. He would admit that he was too much of a Slytherin to completely let them go, but he finally seemed to realize that, as far as Sirius Black was concerned, the past was the past.

The revelation struck Snape speechless, which of course, Sirius interpreted as an answer to his question.

"I thought so" he said sadly. "Do you think I'll get out of this alive?"

Snape hesitated, he didn't want to lend any false hope, and his normal biting sarcasm would no longer suffice. Instead he hedged, "I have a plan, but it would be impossible to speed it along any more. At the very least you will be here another month, maybe more. And it will require you to have a lot of trust in me." He said the last part quietly, afraid of the reaction and what it meant for the future.

Sirius, too, seemed to recognize that this, whatever it was, marked a change in their relationship with each other. It would be hard to pinpoint where exactly this monumental change occurred, but in light of all of the other stressors in both of their lives, they seemed to have realized that their previous feud was petty and foolish.

Sirius nodded, "Then I trust you." Snape looked at him in disbelief and Sirius felt compelled to lighten the mood. "And I'm being serious, too."

Snape refrained from rolling his eyes, but he felt the atmosphere lighten and said, "I have arranged for a way for you to write to Lupin and Potter, should you choose to. You will give your letters to Oreo, who will deliver them to Lupin, and from him to Potter. Potter's letters will follow the same route to you" he saw Black looking at him with the same face that Lupin had just moments before.

"I will work create a warded drawer for you to store these letters in when you aren't reading or writing them, and I don't think I need to remind you about the absolute need for secrecy? And for you to remind Potter to keep these letters hidden?"

And with that last request, Sirius realized just how much Snape was risking by allowing him to send and receive these letters. _If one of these letters is intercepted it will be traced back to him. In all likelihood he will be killed for betraying Voldemort, since only a member of the Order would care about helping a prisoner. _

Sirius nodded solemnly, "You have my word that I will impress the need for secrecy onto my godson."

Snape nodded as well and pulled out his Portkey. He couldn't resist one jibe before he activated it, though. Looking at Black he said, "Isn't _Hogwarts, A History_ too advanced for you, mutt? I can get you some comics if you want."

And Sirius surprised them both with his reaction.

He laughed.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

And there it is.

I'm feeling really good about this fic, but I'm absolutely stuck on where to go in 'Hope' and it's making me a tad bit upset.

Let me know what you like/dislike, want explained (the cramps?), etc.

Please tell me what you think about the latest Snape/Sirius development!

Always,

Sinkme


	9. Chapter 9

Ch.9

Thank you to all of my reviewers and everyone who added the story/author alert or favorite- I live on your support! And cookies to everyone!

Attyfan, wildtaz2go, excessivelyperky, linoria, arabellakye, sonia120462, klester (anon), rebeccaroy, galynSolo (anon), the haunting lady nightshade, jennie (anon), Kascade, cardigrl, lotiolentus, rythems angel, shuzu6616 (anon), it matters not, flawed imagination, young-and-free, wickedmagic, dverducci, jessie145, bzzyt, elif is there (anon), greengirl6, gemini artemis, jackline, skaterkep (anon), Alicia (anon), dracosbaby, laiquendi, snapefreak(anon), liskaxy, Amanda (anon), dizziefan1, writergirlAD, elf (anon), InvaderV.A.M, Onatah1, Iva1201, Sonseeahray, ArcticSeasons, BuckeyeBelle, Raistlin24, lidiladilom, alienaileen, FireChildSlytherin5, kindli (anon), SilvaGirl, cloudsdriftby, The Ravenwolf, Sofia7, kittybloom21, Coconut Rum, ServalSpirit, KlingonGal8489, zule bean, soror noctis, Schwimmschik, kash (anon), tatajess, alphadelt, jonathonbenjamin, xyraeliemna

For anyone who reviewed I tried to PM you individually and to any anonymous reviewers who have questions or bring up good points I'll answer them below:

Skaterkep: thanks for your review!

Kash: thanks for your review! I'm glad you like my Snape, he's a hard character to develop since JK kept him in the background all the time. And I'm trying to keep that line with Dumbledore too, caring but not helpful.

Maintenance:

_Thought_

"Normal speaking"

"_Spell"_

_Nonverbal Spell_

"_Parseltounge"_

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

_Today_ Hermione reflected as she made her way down to breakfast, _would be a long day._

To start, they had double Defense, which usually meant that Harry at least was in a good mood. This year, however, Defense, especially double Defense, was definitely not a cause for celebration.

Over her years as a student, Hermione had worked diligently to fill the gaps left in her education when it came to Defense Against the Dark Arts. Quirrell had been alright, aside from the Dark Lord in the back of his head, but he had stuttered too much for any of the students to really understand what he was saying.

She spent most of that class trying to listen in vain, until she began to tune the professor out and simply read the textbook and recommended reading list in the back.

Lockhart had been the worst of their professors so far. He had been completely inept, lacking even a basic understanding of the subject, and she learned nothing from him or his textbooks that year.

Of course, she had been too enamored with him at the time to recognize how idiotic he was. And being Petrified had put a dent in her studying time.

Professor Lupin, though, she was happy to say, was their finest Defense teacher ever. He had presented a strong curriculum throughout the year and covered his material in detail. Hermione had been ecstatic with how much the man knew and how well he could hold the class's attention. She was sad when he had been forced to leave, for herself and for Harry.

Despite his being a 'dark creature', Professor Lupin had taught her the most about Defense and really sparked her interest in the subject. He was kind and quiet and easy to talk to. And he was someone that could help Harry.

They had both been crushed when he had been forced to leave, _which of course only increased Harry's anger at Snape._

Moody had been alright. He taught them, sure, but his teaching methods and practical hands-on style often drilled home lessons that Hermione felt they were too young for. The Unforgivables had been awful! She was sure that she wasn't the only one who left the class that day feeling more than a little disturbed.

It made perfect sense later, then, to learn that he had been a Death Eater imposter. At that point Hermione had started to wonder how safe they really were at Hogwarts. Two of the last four teachers had been tainted with Dark Magic, aiming to kill Harry, and Dumbledore seemed not to notice. Lockhart had been useless to a fault and put Harry and Ron in danger.

With that last thought the missing link between everything seemed to click, _it all comes back to Harry._

Their first year; the troll, the jinxed broom, Snape refereeing the Quidditch match, the detention in the Forbidden Forest, Norbert, the invisibility cloak, the Stone, Dumbledore leaving that night, Fluffy, the Devil's Snare, the key, the chess match, the potion riddle, facing You-Know-Who.

Their second year; Dobby, Ron's car, Lockhart, Nick's party, Mrs. Norris, Ginny, the diary, the message, warnings that only Harry could hear, Parseltongue, the Bludger, the dueling club, suspecting Draco, the Polyjuice Potion, me getting Petrified, Aragog, the chamber, facing You-Know-Who, rescuing Ginny.

Their third year; Harry not getting in trouble for magic over the summer, the timeturner, Sirius escaping, the dementor on the train, Professor Lupin teaching, the Marauder's Map, the Grim, Harry's Patronus, Buckbeak, finding Peter Pettigrew, Lupin transforming, Pettigrew escaping, Sirius getting captured, going back in time, saving Sirius and Buckbeak.

And last year; Harry's scar, the Quidditch Cup and the attack, the Triwizard Tournament, Moody, Harry being entered, the Unforgivable curses, Harry somehow being forced to compete, facing the worst of all four dragons, miraculously coming out alright, Rita Skeeter, the Second Task, somehow managing to succeed even after the time limit had expired, the Pensieve, Harry's dream/premonition, the Third Task, Cedric dying, Harry fighting You-Know-Who, seeing his parents, escaping, coming back, Crouch being discovered, Fudge not believing him.

_But surely Dumbledore would have noticed this…_Her hand flew to her mouth and she stopped dead in the hall, leaning against the wall. _He wouldn't…It's Dumbledore, he would never…But there's too many of them to just be unfortunate coincidences. Oh, this is too awful to believe. How could he? How _could _he? To a student? To _Harry_? _

Tears were beginning to sting her eyes. She was completely oblivious to the fact that she had been standing in the corridor for the last five minutes and students were beginning to wonder what was wrong.

She dimly heard two voices calling out to her and a hand on her shoulder. She looked up and saw red hair, but instead of the blue ones she expected to see, she saw light hazel eyes.

"Alright, Hermione?" George asked softly. Hermione could barely nod and instead turned into his chest, giving the surprised Weasley a strong and desperate hug.

George looked over to his twin, who shrugged and continued to herd the nosy students away from Hermione and George and towards the Great Hall for breakfast.

After several more minutes Hermione pulled away and wiped at her red eyes. "I'm sorry, George" she mumbled.

George didn't even seem surprised that she could tell him apart from Fred he was so worried. "Hermione you alright?"

She didn't answer at first and when she did it was almost too soft for him to hear, "I think I will be eventually."

"What happened?" That was Fred, back from threatening the first and second years.

Hermione just shook her head, "I don't think I could explain. A question that I never knew I had was just answered and I don't think I want that answer anymore."

The twins, for once, were at a loss for words. They loved Hermione like a sister and it was hard to see her so upset and lost, so they did the only thing they knew best.

"So" Fred began. "Would you say that you're too distracted to notice if we were to slip into our dear Defense professor's classroom-"

"-And leave a couple of harmless items around for her use in say, her fist period fifth year class?" George finished.

Hermione gave a watery laugh, and that was all the answer they needed. Fred gave a wide smile and took her hand. "We would be bereft of our duties as older brothers and role models if we let you stand in the corridors while we plan mischief."

Hermione gave another small smile and let herself be led to the Great Hall. On the way she cast a quick charm to get rid of her red and puffy eyes, and then she parted ways with the twins.

She walked over to the Gryffindor table, ignoring the looks and whispers that accompanied her, and sat next to Ron. She didn't think she could handle sitting next to Harry at the moment and she had no desire to burst into tears again.

"Where were you, Hermione? You left before us" Harry leaned forward to see over Ron.

"Oh" she lied. "I wanted to check something in the library."

She would not, under any circumstances, tell Harry anything of what she now suspected.

"So," she said after a moment. "Double Defense first thing."

"Ugh"

"Bloody hell!"

She smiled at her friends , "And we have Potions this afternoon."

"Hermione" Ron whined. "Are you trying to ruin my appetite?"

Harry stayed silent and Hermione felt compelled to say something to her friend, so she moved over to sit on his other side, pushing her previous thoughts to the back of her mind.

"Harry" she began. "I know Defense is awful, and Professor Umbridge isn't a good teacher and she isn't fair, but you really do need to control your temper."

Her friend turned away from her angrily and started to spear his food.

She continued, though, "She's not going to change what she thinks- she's Fudge's toady through and through. Meanwhile you've already had two detentions with her. This can't continue all year- what about Quidditch."

She could see that she hit a spot of interest for him and she smiled inwardly, "I know that she's unpleasant, but just remember that if you're in detention, with either Professor Umbridge _or_ Professor Snape, then you're taking away time from the team."

Harry nodded sullenly, but she knew him well enough to see that he was considering her words and she knew it was a start.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Defense was horrid.

That was really the only way to describe it. Several students had held out the hope that they would use their wands today and had them on the table in front of them.

Umbridge was not amused. "Put your wands away. You should know by now that you have little use for them in this class" she said.

"Is this Defense Againstthe Dark Arts or Defense Against the _theory_ of Dark Arts?" Ron grumbled as he, too, stowed his wand carefully away in his robe pocket.

"Read chapter 4. There will be no need to talk" she stared at them, ready for any arguing.

Most of the students pulled out their textbooks quietly and began the reading, or began to pretend to read. Hermione had already finished the chapter, in fact the whole book, a while ago so she allowed her mind to wander.

_But what if they are coincidences? It's not like I can just go talk to Dumbledore about this even if they aren't coincidences. I doubt McGonagall would listen either. Ugh! This is so awful and frustrating. I can't tell anyone. Dumbledore is the epitome of good magic, no one would believe me. _

_I'm not sure I believe myself. Even someone as powerful as the Headmaster couldn't have engineered the whole thing to play out like that. Some of it had to be a coincidence. Or just bad luck. He wouldn't have put the students at risk just to design these tests for Harry…would he?_

_Why Harry? It has something to do with his scar, I know it. There's something I don't know that will make everything clearer. I doubt Harry himself even knows what's going on. But how could we all be so blind?_

_I need more information. And it won't be in the library. I'll need to join the Order. But even then he probably won't trust me enough to tell me since I'm too close to Harry._

_  
And Dumbledore has to be working alone. I couldn't bear the thought of someone else doing this to Harry as well. I can't imagine anyone else even willing to go along with this- Lupin, Sirius, Tonks, Kingsley, Moody, the Weasleys, McGonagall, Snape…_

_Snape._

_Snape?_

…_he's been around most of the times we were breaking the rules. He always seems to know when Harry is out-of-bounds. He hates Lupin and Sirius. He's loyal to the Headmaster, spy for the Order, ex-Death Eater, no one trusts him. _

_And he's saved Harry so many times. Always there if the challenge was too much for Harry on his own. The broom in first year, he turned the suspicions off of us after Mrs. Norris was petrified, was there to protect us from Sirius and then took us up to the school after the Dementors left. And last year he was there after the Third Task and Dumbledore asked him to do something. _

_Could he be in on it? I don't know why but I feel like he's not. If my conclusion is correct then this feels like something Dumbledore is doing by himself. So Snape has some other motivation to save Harry. _

_I need more information…_

Hermione, of course, was not the only one who wasn't reading the assigned chapter, but she was the only one who had already read it.

She heard Harry muttering under his breath but decided not to say anything to him since he was taking a step in the right direction if he wasn't saying anything louder.

Suddenly Umbridge's voice cut across the silent room, making several students jump, "Well, class, since I see so many of you are not paying attention to the chapter, let's just have a little quiz to test your knowledge.

Hermione spared a glance at her two friends; the chapters in the book weren't difficult to read or understand, but they were very specific in their views and a lot of their points weren't really the first thing that someone would think to do. Most of the plans of action that the book outlined avoided magic at all and encouraged a victim to not fight back and wait for a Ministry official to arrive on scene, but of course, this was an unlikely scenario since there was no reason for anyone to be attacked in recent times.

Hermione had a feeling that neither of them would do well and without any practical application of spells in this class, both of them would be hard pressed to pass the class.

But she shrugged it off, _I've been telling them for years that they need to study and take these classes seriously. Maybe after this they'll start to listen to me. _

The quiz itself was fairly easy to anyone who had read the chapter until Hermione got to the last couple of questions. _These are from chapters we haven't read in class yet! She wants us to do poorly. _

It wasn't just one or two chapters ahead, but almost ten chapters beyond what they had already finished. Fuming, Hermione raised her hand.

"Miss Granger, this is a quiz" Umbridge said venomously. Ever since Hermione, Ron, and several other Gryffindors had made it clear in their first class that Umbridge was unwelcome at Hogwarts and they didn't approve of her teaching methods, the professor had been giving them the cold shoulder.

"Yes, Professor, I know. But I had a query about the last couple of questions" Hermione said tightly.

"I would think they would be rather straightforward, Miss Granger" she sneered.

"Well, yes Professor. They are rather _basic_, but the questions at the end are not from the chapter that was assigned to be read in class today. Was I wrong in assuming that the quiz was on the chapter we just read?" the class, already silent, froze and turned to look at how Umbridge would react.

No one dared to breathe as the woman smiled, "Miss Granger. Are you questioning the Ministy-approved method that I am teaching you with?"

Hermione could see Harry and Ron out of the corner of her eye, _I'm doing the exact same thing that I just warned Harry about. But how can anyone expect to do well in this class if the questions are unfair and there are no practicals?_

She set her chin, "Yes, Professor, I am."

The class sucked in the breaths they had been holding, looking wide-eyed at Hermione. None of them could believe that she had talked back to a teacher, although the title barely applied to the toad in the front.

"Detention, Miss Granger" she barked. "Tonight at 7 o'clock."

Harry made to protest but she reached with her left hand and placed it on his shoulder, pushing him down in his seat. She leaned across, whispering, "Harry, don't do this. What I just did was stupid and you saw how she reacted. She hates you more. You just got finished with four days worth of detentions with her. I'll go talk to McGonagall. Just leave it for now."

Harry flexed his hand, which, Hermione noticed had faint white lines shining on the top. "You don't know what she does, Hermione. It's inhuman."

"All the more reason to go to McGonagall" she said.

Umbridge had already turned away from them and was just noticing something in the corner of the room. It looked like a regular broom and it wouldn't have looked out of place in any other classroom, but in Umbridge's it stuck out like Hagrid in just about any public setting. As she reached to pick it up, Hermione realized with a start that Fred and George had probably planted it there.

"Oh no" she groaned.

Then mayhem broke out. As soon as Umbridge touched the broom it came to life, shooting off multicolored sparks and emitting whistling shrieks and bangs. Umbridge jumped back, startled, and then the broom took to the air like a firework and flew around the room, still shooting sparks and shrieking.

The class laughed as Umbridge tried unsuccessfully to hit the broom with a spell, and then the broom soared low, in between rows of students. Everyone's eyes were on the broom, but Hermione was watching Umbridge, who suddenly grinned maliciously.

She kept her wand trained on the broom and the next time it dipped low she cried out, _"Stupefy."_

Except that she had aimed the spell at Harry.

Hermione could hardly believe it and was frozen in shock so that it wasn't until she heard her friend fall out of the chair and hit the floor from the force of the spell that she moved.

The class was silent once more, glaring openly at the professor, many calling out in shock or anger. Hermione pulled out her wand and turned to Harry, casting _"Ennervate"_ to undo the Stunner and helped him sit up again.

She turned to look at Umbridge with all the hostility she could muster, but the woman's face was still fixed in a sickly smile.

"Another detention, Miss Granger. I told you that you would have no need for a wand in this class. Tomorrow at 7 o'clock."

Hermione locked her jaw and sat down once more, keeping a firm grip on both Harry's shoulder and her wand and shooting Ron a look.

Sensing that the class was better off being dismissed, she gave them a two foot homework assignment on the chapter they should have read in class and the next two as well.

Everyone left in a hurry, eager to get away from the most hated professor in the school. Because from that moment on, everyone, even the Gryffindors, had decided that not even Snape was as bad as the pink horror.

Harry had insisted that he felt fine and refused to go to the Hospital Wing, although if he had gone he would have been able to report Umbridge. _But no_ Hermione snorted. _That would be letting her 'win'. _She wondered briefly what Umbridge did in detention that had Harry so worried, but shrugged it off moments later, her ire and frustration at the woman in question winning over her apprehension. Lunch was strained at best, and their afternoon classes passed slowly.

Hermione spent the rest of the day silently fuming, and had all but forgotten her earlier questions until she entered the Potions classroom and saw Professor Snape sitting at his desk in the front of the room.

Everything came back to her in a rush and she didn't move until Harry took her arm and guided her to the table. She flushed with embarrassment but didn't say anything to his questioning look.

She looked at the professor. He looked a little better than he had the other day. She wondered briefly what had happened the other morning that made the always punctual teacher late to class, but she knew better than to even dream of asking him.

The Slytherins in the room were quiet and Hermione picked up on their reserved mood. _They probably know him best, and if they're this quiet I don't think I'm going to like it._

True enough, Snape was in an extremely foul mood that class. The potion they were set to brew was difficult enough without the intimidating professor stalking through the rows, pausing for just long enough to look over each student's shoulder.

In most cases he made a condescending sound, making the student panic into thinking they were doing something wrong with the potion. For Harry and Neville, though, he said a few quiet words. She saw Harry's fist clench again and he said something nasty under his breath.

Hermione sucked in her breath, Harry hadn't been quiet enough with his muttered insult. "Detention Potter" Snape almost smiled. "For insulting a teacher. Remain after class."

Ron opened his mouth as well but Hermione stamped down hard on his foot, earning herself a glare from her red headed friend. She ignored his muttered comment, "So you're allowed to talk back to Umbridge, Harry gets Snape, and I get my foot crushed."

The rest of the class was passed in silence with no further incidences. The potion was so consuming that Hermione barely had a moment to consider anything she had been thinking about that morning and how the man in the front of the room played into it.

When the bell rang many of the students broke into relieved sighs, desperate to be away from the oppressing silence of the dungeons. Snape called out the assignment due for the next class as everyone brought up their finished or semi-finished potion.

Hermione watched as Harry approached Snape's desk after everyone had left. She and Ron walked out into the corridor to wait for their friend.

They didn't have to wait long, as after only two minutes their dark haired friend came out of the classroom at a light jog, not even turning around as they caught up to him.

"What did you get, mate?" Ron asked after a moment.

"Stupid overgrown bat gave me a detention for this Friday night" Harry snarled.

"Bu-but that's Quidditch tryouts!" Ron looked crestfallen.

"I KNOW!" Harry yelled. Ron shrank back at his friends tone. "Damn awful git just smiled at me and told me that with a temper like mine it was probably better that I missed tryouts because I would be a liability to the team! DAMNIT! I hate him!"

Hermione, by this point, was tired of her friend's attitude. She had dealt with it for his stay at Grimmauld Place and she had been yelled and seen him yell at almost all of his friends.

She knew, though, that anything she said would be taken the wrong way so she just made her way to Gryffindor Tower without a word, hoping that the confusion would help her friend cool down.

Hermione was determined to get as much work as she could done before her detention and committed herself to the mind numbing task of studying and writing her assigned essays.

She was not surprised that Harry and Ron had not come up to the Common Room and was pleased with how much work she got done. _It's a lot easier to concentrate when I don't have to help them with their work. _

Hermione decided to go down to the Great Hall for a quick bite of dinner before her detention. She frowned, remembering what Harry had said about Umbridge, and continued out through the portrait hole and down the corridors.

Unnervingly enough, Harry didn't show up for dinner. When she looked at Ron he just shrugged and continued piling food on his plate. "He had the drapes closed. I told him I was going down to dinner and he didn't answer. He's probably asleep."

Hermione glanced at him critically, "Is he still having nightmares?" She kept her voice down but the tone remained sharp.

Hermione had first been alerted to her friend's sleeping problems over the summer, when one of his nightmares had woken everyone in the nearby rooms.

Ron nodded, "Almost every night."

"Well why didn't you say anything?" she asked incredulously. "I'm sure Madam Pomfrey or Professor Du-" she coughed, choking on his name. "-the Headmaster can help."

"Hermione, you know Harry as well as I do. Rita Skeeter didn't do him any favors last year- if he went to the Hospital Wing for these nightmares with You-Know-Who, people would only badger him more and play him up to be some kind of loony. He wants to keep this quiet. I think he's embarrassed and frustrated and so far nothing this year has been going right for him."

Hermione looked at her red headed friend, a little shocked, and thought _I really don't give Ron enough credit. He's always been good with Harry and he's a strategist at heart. He really knows what's bugging Harry and what he needs to do to make him feel better._

"You're right, Ron" she gave him a smile. "We'll get through this year together, just like we made it through the last four."

"And now, I need to go to detention. Never thought I would say that again, I swore after the Norbert incident I was done." She made her way out of the Hall and headed towards the Defense classroom.

She entered cautiously, calling out for the professor.

"Here, Miss Granger." Umbridge came out of a connecting door and led Hermione into her office.

Hermione could barely refrain from making at face at the décor of the room. It was frighteningly pink, and there were far too many cats in the room to feel comfortable. She idly wondered how Pettigrew would fare in this room before snapping her mind back to the present.

Umbridge pointed to a small table in front of her desk that held a parchment, inkwell, and quill. _Just lines? Maybe she had Harry do something else?_

Hermione sat down at the desk, trying her hardest to keep a neutral expression in front of her most hated professor.

"Miss Granger, should you answer my next question I will dismiss tonight and tomorrow night's detention" the woman was talking rather softly, making Hermione feel on alert.

She didn't answer, instead she waited for Umbridge to ask her question, which she did after several minutes of silence.

"I want to know who is responsible for the broom that was placed in my classroom."

Hermione's eyes widened momentarily, and she cursed herself mentally. _Now she knows that I know who did it. _

"I don't know Professor" she said.

"Hm. Well, then, Miss Granger, you will write lines until I am satisfied that the message has been _embedded _in your mind."

Hermione's eyes narrowed at the woman's tone, but she picked up her quill regardless. "What should I write, Professor?"

"You will write 'I must not question the Ministry' until I dismiss you" the woman said.

Hermione's fists clenched and she locked her jaw, being sure to keep her eyes down so as to not provoke the Defense teacher anymore.

She moved to write the line, noticed her quill had no ink, and dipped it back in the inkwell. But still, no ink stuck on the quill tip. "Professor I will need ink."

"No, you won't Miss Granger. Do not talk again."

Hermione clamped down on the inside of her cheek and started writing her first line with a quill with no ink. To her surprise, as she wrote the word it appeared in red ink on the parchment.

She squeaked with pain after she finished the first line. She looked at her right hand, noticing with horror that the words she had just written were now cut into the back of her hand. As she stared the words disappeared, leaving her skin red.

"You…" she whispered furiously.

"Yes, Miss Granger?" she asked sweetly.

_It's a blood quill. That's what Harry meant. And he had four detentions with her! How could I have missed something like this? That awful toad…_

Hermione did not reply, instead she went onto her second line, wincing in pain as the line was cut again into her skin.

She lost count of the number of times she had written the same line, but it had become dark long ago. To the best of her ability she did not make a sound, although recently the cuts wouldn't heal right away, and had begun to bleed slightly.

Still, though, the Professor did not give her any indication that the detention would end soon, so she kept writing.

Hermione was forced to ball her left hand into a fist and bite her tongue to keep from making any indication of the pain she was in. After several more minutes, Umbridge looked up.

"Well" she said sweetly. "Let's see how far you got. Come here."

Hermione stood stiffly, her back and neck protesting the change of position, and her hand pulsed with pain. Umbridge extended her hand, as if asking for something and Hermione couldn't hide her disgust as she lifted her own hand.

The professor grabbed her hand roughly and examined the cuts. Hermione flinched and was instantly ashamed as she saw Umbridge's smile widen. "I think that this has made a lasting impression on you. Report here tomorrow at 7:00 for your second detention."

Hermione walked as quickly as she could out of the office and Defense classroom. She cradled her hand to her chest as she walked through the corridor, taking deep, calming breaths to fight the panic and horror that was rising in her. _Harry was right about her. She's beyond inhuman. That was torture. Medieval, cruel, and pointless torture. Oh, that awful, foul toad…_

Her thoughts were interrupted as she collided with someone who was coming around the corner. She cried out as she involuntarily broke her fall with her right hand, and immediately pulled the appendage to her chest, fighting off fresh tears of pain.

She looked to see who she had run into and her heart sunk as she recognized the black robes of the Potions Master.

"Miss Granger" he said dangerously as he stood and righted himself. "Out after curfew, I see."

It wasn't really a question, but Hermione felt the need to justify herself. She stood slowly, still keeping her right hand tight against her chest in an effort to ward off the pain.

"Sir, Professor Umbridge just released me from detention…"

But something about the Potions Professor's expression gave Hermione the feeling that he wasn't listening to her.

"Sir…" she ventured after a minute.

"Give me your hand Miss Granger" he said softly, and much more gently than she had ever heard him.

"Sir? What?"

"Your hand, girl" he was starting to lose his temper.

She tentatively held out her right hand for the second time in ten minutes. But even as she braced herself for the pain, she found him gently grasping her wrist and looking at the cuts on her hand with the oddest expression.

He seemed to forget that she was there, because for several minutes he was silent as he kept his gaze on her hand. His hand trembled ever so slightly, and just as Hermione was about to say something he finally blinked and looked up at her face.

"You said you had detention with Professor Umbridge?" he said tightly, and from the way his head was positioned she had no doubt that he could read the words written on her hand.

"Yes, sir, I-" but she was cut off with a sudden grunt of pain from Snape. His right arm jerked as his hand flew to grasp his left forearm. His sudden movement had upset Hermione's hand, and she gave a soft cry of pain and pulled her hand securely to herself.

He spared her a glance before pulling himself upright. "Get to your common room, now."

He practically ran from the corridor, and Hermione wasn't able to rouse herself from her shock for at least a minute. After she did she moved towards Gryffindor tower, trying to piece together his odd behavior when the obvious conclusion blindsided her. _He was summoned. _

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I had debated a lot of stuff in this chapter, but I decided to end it here and next chapter will start with the day Hermione just experienced from Snape's pov, but it will be short, and then the Death Eater meeting that everyone's been secretly waiting for because we love when Snape's in pain for some weird reason.

So for anyone who's wondering- I had the blood quill with Hermione as well as Harry because I thought it would be important for her to realize that there are people out there who will hurt her, and introducing Hermione to the real world sooner rather than later is my goal. It only took one extra long detention for the cuts to stay on her hand/bleed because I expect that compared to Harry, Hermione has delicate hands. Harry did chores (i.e yardwork) as a kid with the Dursleys, and he plays Quidditch, and he's a boy, that gives me the impression that his hands would be tougher than Hermione's, hence the need for three detentions before the lines started to remain on his hands, and more to keep the line on his hand forever.

I know this was probably boring, but it had to be written, I promise you'll like the next chapter!

Please leave your thoughts! (Is Hermione too rebellious...)

Always

Sinkme


	10. Chapter 10

Ch. 10

I cannot believe how much support this story has gotten- what started as a one shot has turned into my favorite story to write. It's surreal to think how many hits this has gotten (over 8,000!!!) and I just can't believe it! thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou

Thank you to all of my reviewers and everyone who added the story/author alert or favorite- I live on your support!

Attyfan, wildtaz2go, excessivelyperky, linoria, arabellakye, sonia120462, klester (anon), rebeccaroy, galynSolo (anon), the haunting lady nightshade, jennie (anon), Kascade, cardigrl, lotiolentus, rythems angel, shuzu6616 (anon), it matters not, flawed imagination, young-and-free, wickedmagic, dverducci, jessie145, bzzyt, elif is there (anon), greengirl6, gemini artemis, jackline, skaterkep, Alicia (anon), dracosbaby, laiquendi, snapefreak(anon), liskaxy, Amanda (anon), dizziefan1, writergirlAD, elf (anon), InvaderV.A.M, Onatah1, Iva1201, Sonseeahray, ArcticSeasons, BuckeyeBelle, Raistlin24, lidiladilom, alienaileen, FireChildSlytherin5, kindli (anon), SilvaGirl, cloudsdriftby, The Ravenwolf, Sofia7, kittybloom21, Coconut Rum, ServalSpirit, KlingonGal8489, zule bean, soror noctis, Schwimmschik, kash (anon), tatajess, alphadelt, jonathonbenjamin, xyraeliemna, kithic, CharredQuill, MissPrincess1989, monikalukman, melethwen, erin5453, withthelightsout, deeps85, gibsonangelic

For anyone who reviewed I tried to PM you individually and to any anonymous reviewers who have questions or bring up good points I'll answer them below:

Maintenance:

_Thought_

"Normal speaking"

"_Spell"_

_Nonverbal Spell_

"_Parseltounge"_

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

When Snape woke up on Wednesday morning he was pleased to note that the minor tremors that had continuously wracked his body until late last night were down to a minimum.

He had gotten a decent amount of rest, but that rest came at the cost of several other things that had yet to be completed. It was this more than anything that forced him out of his bed early that morning to finish the brews that the Dark Lord required.

_I was lucky that the acid the Dark Lord requested was low maintenance; otherwise I wouldn't have been able to let it brew as long as it did._

He went into his lab, moving slower than he would have liked, but he didn't need to keep up appearances when he was alone, and so he continued at his own pace.

He first checked the acid that he had left brewing and found that it was not unsalvageable, he added an Ashwinder egg that had been only partially frozen, to increase the potency of the acid. He turned to check the cauldrons that had contained the two remaining poisons and found that they were empty. Frowning he went to check that the other two poisons were still locked in his warded cupboard.

Unlocking the wards he found that there were three vials of each potion sitting in the cabinet. _Dumbledore must have bottled them when he finished the Wolfsbane the other day. _

He nodded, glad that they were all done, and pulled out two special vials that had been charmed specially to hold corrosive potions, like the acid that the Dark Lord required.

He bottled it carefully and placed two vials next to the poisons, and then reset the wards. His own wards reminded him that he needed to make a warded cabinet for Sirius to keep his letters in; he wasn't about to take the chance that someone wouldn't appeal to the Dark Lord to visit Black one day soon, especially with no new information forthcoming.

He rubbed his forearm absentmindedly, _tonight or tomorrow…it will not be much longer. _

He checked and rechecked his personal stock of healing potions before moving into his classroom to prepare for the day and finish the essays that had been stacked off to the side.

By the time he left to go to breakfast he felt moderately better; the potions for the Dark Lord and the hospital wing were done, the Wolfsbane would keep until Sunday, although he still wanted to experiment with the extra that Albus had stored, the essays were done, the only thing that gnawed at him was the Cruciatus potion- he had no idea what to do with it, and Sirius was running out of time.

He sat next to Minerva and Flitwick, who was telling her about his evaluation yesterday. He listened interestedly, many of the students and even professors were complaining about the woman and he wanted to know what to expect for his own evaluation.

"She was there before the class started, just sitting in the back with a clipboard. She kept jotting notes throughout the whole lesson, and I did my best to ignore her and teach as I always have. I thought the class went as fine as could be expected with third year snakes and lions" he glanced at the two Heads. Minerva inclined her head sheepishly, knowing that her charges could be rather easily riled when paired with Slytherins. Snape's face remained blank.

"She wandered around when I set them to practice the new charm and talked to some of the students, mostly the Slytherins," here Snape frowned. "She stayed behind after the lesson and asked me some questions." Flitwick ended his explanation quickly, as if ashamed to continue talking.

"Questions?" Minerva asked.

"How long had I taught? Who did I apprentice under?" Flitwick ducked his head. "That sort of thing."

Neither Head was fooled, though, having each had their share of students who were reluctant to tell the truth. Snape guessed Umbridge's intention first, "She asked you about your ancestry."

Minerva's eyes glazed over in momentary anger and then looked over to Snape, surprised that he had so quickly surmised what was bothering the Charms Master.

"She is notorious in the Ministry for favoring legislation to curtail the rights of certain races; specifically the werewolves, giants, goblins, and centaurs. Lupin and the Headmaster have been trying to fight her decrees in the Ministry for years with minimal success" Snape explained.

Flitwick nodded, "She asked me how much Goblin blood I had. I almost asked her why it mattered but I lost my nerve."

Minerva said, "It shouldn't matter, Filius. You are a terrific Charms teacher and Head. She is out of place and the Ministry is becoming more corrupt by the day."

Snape had never been one to offer pretty words or condolences; instead he asked the question that Filius had raised earlier, "You said that she was talking to more of my snakes during the lesson?"

Filius nodded contemplatively, "Yes, at most she spoke with two Gryffindors, as opposed to six Slytherins. Why?"

_Damn_, "No reason, Filius. Although I agree with Minerva's assessment of your teaching skills."

"Filius do you have a Sneakoscope on you?" Minerva asked, suddenly quite serious. Snape and Flitwick looked at her, alarmed.

"No, Minerva, I don't. What's the matter?" The Charms Professor asked, looking around warily.

"It is quite obvious that someone is impersonating Severus. He agreed with me _and_ paid you a compliment. We need to be on alert!"

Flitwick burst into laughter when McGonagall gently poked Snape in the arm, as if to determine if he was really who he claimed to be.

Snape's face remained blank, although his eyes glittered, "Very mature, _Professor_. And you wonder why your lions always get into trouble."

McGonagall smiled at the younger man, in previous years he would have huffed and left the table with robes billowing, but now he accepted the jibe, acknowledging that it was done to lift Filius's mood.

The talk turned to the upcoming Quidditch tryouts for Gryffindor, and McGonagall and Snape continued their sarcastic banter, much to Flitwick's amusement.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

His classes passed slowly, as only Wednesday classes can go. His morning classes were tedious lessons for first and third years, and after lunch he had Potter's class to look forward to.

Lunch was spent listening to more of the gossip about Umbridge as she inspected another professor, Vector this time.

Vector's class had been the NEWT level seventh years, a mix of all the Houses due to the lack of interest and difficulty of the material. There were only fourteen students total; seven from Ravenclaw, three from Slytherin, and two each from Hufflepuff and Gryffindor.

Snape hadn't been paying all that much attention until he heard Vector say, "And you would think with such a small class that she would talk with every student, but she barely spoke with anyone. Just Cooper, Johnson, Rowlins, Crawford, and Douglass, not even the Head Boy."

Snape froze, suddenly interested; three of the five that were just named were his Slytherins. _That's twice now that I've heard of Umbridge singling out my snakes. I don't like where this is going._

Snape made his way down to his dungeons, trying to make the best use of his free class block. He needed a new direction with the Cruciatus potion and he needed it soon. _The longer it takes the more danger I'm in of being discovered or killed because I keep stalling._

Having decided before that the two potions couldn't be simply combined; he began to write out the steps and ingredients in each potion, looking for similarities between the two. After half an hour he was left with nothing to show for his work and his frustration was reaching new levels. _They can't be combined, they can't be brewed as one potion-their brewing styles are so different that using one method would cause the other potion to fail, making it a complete waste of time. _

He was beginning to think that he should give up on this potion and look for another way to get Sirius out safely. _But I know this can work. I'm missing something. _He picked up the parchments he had written on. _They have some steps in common, some ingredients are the same. I know there's a way to make this potion work. The Draught of Living Death has to kick in after the fake Cruciatus potion. I can't use two different potions or the Dark Lord will become suspicious, it needs to be one potion- that way when it seems that Black is dead I can write it off as an unfortunate side-effect of the Cruciatus potion that I hadn't foreseen. _

The potion, however, was proving difficult, and Snape ended up throwing the parchments down in a fit of anger and storming into the main room. He perused his book shelves for anything he thought might help, and spent the rest of his time taking notes out of several thick tomes, writing down anything he could find about combining two separate potions.

Already in a foul mood, he knew that this class would be a pain. He sat at his desk in the front of the room, watching as the fifth years filed in. His Slytherins picked up on his mood and were silent. He was inwardly appreciative; _maybe even these dense Gryffindors will pick up on their silence. _

But it was not to be.

He watched as Hermione Granger walked into the room, saw him, and then stood frozen. He raised an eyebrow as Potter led her by the elbow to her seat but said nothing. She continued to shoot glances at him over the next several minutes as the last students found their places.

"You will be brewing the Draught of Peace today. It is complicated and appears on your OWL exam, so we will be brewing several more times." He paused to look at Potter. "No doubt some of you will need the practice."

He flicked his wand and the instructions appeared on the board in front. "You will need the entire class. Begin."

Several students went immediately to retrieve the ingredients, and the class was much more subdued than he was used to. He walked back and forth between cauldrons as the students began brewing, watching several students, mostly the Gryffindors and Crabbe and Goyle, for any indication that they were messing up or that the potion would turn volatile.

He tutted over several student's shoulders, making them double check their work and correct the mistake they were about to make. Some of the stupider Gryffindors ignored his warning and added their ingredient anyway.

Longbottom's potion was already a dangerous shade of purple, and Snape stalked over to the boy's cauldron.

"Your brewing skills are an embarrassment, Longbottom. You're lucky you haven't blown up the class yet with this assignment." He vanished the mess, "I want a foot and a half for next class on the proper steps and ingredients for this potion and where you went wrong."

The boy nodded, embarrassed, and pulled out a blank piece of parchment and the Potions text to begin the assignment. Snape was already moving to the ruined mess that Potter called a potion.

"What is that supposed to be Potter?" he asked.

"The Draught of Peace" Potter replied.

Snape frowned at the boy's lack of respect by not addressing him as 'sir'.

"Potter, I realize you are a slow learner, but five years at Hogwarts should have taught you that teachers are shown respect" his voice was soft, in contrast to his blazing eyes.

"Yes, _sir_" Potter snarled.

Snape frowned again, _temper temper. _"Potter, this potion is a complete failure. As much as it pains me to say this, you might actually be worse at Potions than your failure of a father."

Potter's eyes shone with anger, "Well, _sir, _at least I'm not a failure of a human. You're just a greasy, mean, cowardly bat that picks on students."

The room, quiet before, became still and silent. "Well Potter, unfortunately for you, I am also a teacher. You will remain after class so I can schedule your detention."

He resumed a leisurely pace around the room, noting with a smirk when Granger stomped hard on Weasley's foot to keep the idiotic boy from earning a detention for himself.

As the period came to a close Snape called out, "Bottle a sample and bring it to the front to be graded. We will try this again later since certain students can't seem to grasp the art of potion-making. Everyone will read the next chapter and write a foot summarizing it."

He waited until most of the students had brought their samples to their class shelf off to the side and then went to sit behind his desk as Potter made his way to the front, his two sidekicks waiting just outside the door.

"Mr. Potter, no doubt you think yourself better than everyone else and I thought I made it clear to you on day one that I would not coddle you as the other professors do. You will serve a detention this Friday evening with me for your lack of respect."

"But Friday's the Quidditch tryouts" Potter was upset.

"Oh, is it really? How unfortunate that you couldn't keep your temper in check, then. Seven thirty, do not be late."

He watched as the boy practically ran from the room, and heard as he yelled at his friends. Snape shook his head, _he's so immature that if I hadn't heard the prophecy myself I would doubt his power. At the very least he will never be able to learn Occlumency from me. It will be a complete disaster. _

Snape made his way to dinner after another frustrating hour of working on ideas for the Cruciatus potion. He had almost forgotten about Potter's detention until he caught sight of Minerva at the staff table.

_This ought to be fun._

He sat down, making sure to keep his face carefully blank and calm. "Minerva, Filius, how are you?"

"Don't try that with me, Severus" McGonagall hissed. Snape inwardly smirked.

"Try what, Minerva? I am merely being cordial to my colleagues since people so often accuse me of being cold and ill-mannered."

McGonagall brushed off his excuse, "You gave Harry detention on Friday. During the tryouts for Gryffindor."

"I hadn't realized, how unfortunate that the two coincide" Snape was really enjoying himself, although he allowed none of his amusement to show.

Filius sat next to Snape and was looking at the man curiously, wondering if he had a death wish.

"You will change Potter's detention to another day so that he can go to tryouts" McGonagall said.

"No, I will not" Snape knew this was coming.

"You did this on purpose- you goaded him into acting and then gave him a detention for Friday, knowing that it was tryouts" Minerva sounded furious.

"I did not goad him, as you say. The boy hardly needs any encouragement to insult me, and as fitting for his lack of respect I gave him a detention. I thought the lesson might stick a little better if he lost something because of his cheek" Snape explained, starting to lose his composure.

"I'm sure that's how it happened, Severus" Minerva retorted sarcastically. "I don't see why you can't change the date, though. A detention is a detention. Move it to Saturday, make him lose a free afternoon."

"No, I will not change the time. It stands at Friday at seven" he pushed his chair back from the table. "Would you even bother asking me if it wasn't your precious Potter that would miss tryouts?"

He stood and left, seething. _It's not as if Potter has any competition for his spot anyway. I don't see why Minerva expects me to bend over backwards for this boy when he has shown me nothing to merit such behavior._

He retreated into his potions lab, conceding defeat with the Cruciatus potion for the moment, and moving on to experiment with the Wolfsbane. _I'm glad Albus bottled the extra Wolfsbane, I doubt Lupin will need it- he's careful with regards to his potion. But I can use it to test something._

_It is a well known fact that werewolves have adverse reactions to silver, even Muggles know that. I want to know what will happen if I add a small amount of silver to the Wolfsbane, which allows the human mind to maintain control. Could the silver halt the transformation at all? Give the human more control?_

As his goal today was solely to see if such a combination was possible, he divided the remaining potion into two equal parts. Half he kept in a goblet; the other half went into a cauldron. He brought the potion to simmer gently and debated between using solid silver, as from a piece of jewelry, or some of the silver nitrate he had.

He had a plethora of ingredients; both Muggle and magic, stored in his personal lab because he firmly believed that it was better to have and not need than not have and be in want of.

He decided on the silver nitrate because it dissolves better, and raised several wards over the cauldron to contain an explosion should one occur.

Before he added the silver nitrate he marked in his ledger the amount of Wolfsbane, how long it had been since it was made and bottled, what conditions it was stored in and for how long, the temperature of the fire it was simmering over, and the amount of silver nitrate that would be added, so that he could later work from these notes.

Using his wand and backing up several steps, he dropped in two drops of silver nitrate.

Immediately a plume of smoke rose up, but the expected explosion was not forthcoming. He cautiously stepped closer to see the results. Instead of the usual blue color it was now a bluish-gray, and gave off no smoke at all, whereas the usual Wolfsbane smoked for hours after it was completed. He sniffed lightly, usually the potion gave off a repugnant odor and Lupin had commented that it tasted foul. Instead, though, he found the smell greatly diminished in regards to its usual smell, although still awful compared to almost anything else.

Intrigued by this new development he pulled forward the same parchment and began to write out what had occurred.

It was several hours before he pulled himself away from the potion, and it was actually Winky that had forced him out, reminding him that he hadn't eaten and it was his night to patrol the corridors.

He assented and she brought him a meal from the kitchens, filled with too much food as usual. He ate less than half, thanking Winky, and then went into his room to change. He pulled out his Death Eater mask, shrunk it, and placed it in an interior pocket. Then he walked into his lab and retrieved the poisons and the acid that the Dark Lord requested, and stored them in a specially created pocket to hold such vials.

They were situated over his chest, just below his heart, so that he had easy access to them. They were held in place with charmed cloth, so that they wouldn't 'chink' excessively when he walked either.

Satisfied that he was ready if he was indeed summoned later he left for his rounds, reminding Winky that if he wasn't back by 2am to alert the Headmaster.

It was only eleven when he began, so he found several of the older students out and around and delighted in taking points and sending them back to their dormitories. As the hour ticked by and midnight approached the corridors became empty of the occasional professor and Snape basked in the silence.

Around twelve thirty he made his way down the Defense corridor, mentally praying that Umbridge was not in her classroom. As he turned the corner he was knocked over by someone who had been walked very quickly.

He looked to the person as he heard a soft cry of pain and identified who it was. "Miss Granger" he said silkily as he stood. "Out after curfew, I see."

He watched curiously as she pulled her right hand close to her and answered, "Sir, Professor Umbridge just released me from detention."

But he was no longer focused on her answer. Instead, he found his gaze drawn to the blood that was slowly trailing down the girl's arm.

"Sir…" she tried to get his attention.

"Give me your hand, Miss Granger" he said softly. He needed to know what happened.

"Sir? What?" She sounded confused.

"Your hand, girl" he said roughly.

She held out her hand slowly and he took it gently, doing his best not to jostle the appendage. He turned her hand slightly, trying to get a better angle to see the cuts.

Except that they weren't random cuts. He noticed, slightly horrified, that the cuts seemed to spell out something. He tilted her hand slowly, trying to get better light in order to read the words upside down.

He hissed as he made out the words _I must not question the Ministry._

"You said you had detention with Professor Umbridge?" he asked tightly.

"Yes, sir, I-" as she spoke a searing pain laced up his left arm, originating from the Dark Mark. The pain surprised him and he automatically moved to assuage the pain with his right hand. In doing so, though, he moved Hermione's hand, causing her to cry out again.

He glanced at her for a moment and then said, "Get to your common room, now."

He could ill afford any distractions now, and he fought to clear his mind as he ran from the corridor, making a beeline for the bottom floor and a way outside.

Once outside he pulled out his mask and enlarged it, fitting it over his face as he approached the Forbidden Forest. He touched his wand to the Dark Mark and apparated away with a soft 'pop'.

He was, again, one of the last to arrive and take his place in the circle. He noticed with a clenched heart that it was only the Inner Circle (1) that had been summoned; Lucius, Pettigrew, Macnair, Bellatrix, Rodolphus, Rabastan, Dolohov, Mulciber, and Rookwood.

"My Lord" he murmured reverently as he took his place to the Dark Lord's left, next to Dolohov.

"Now that we are all here we may begin" Voldemort said. "Rookwood, how goes the search?"

Snape listened attentively as Rookwood told Voldemort how things were proceeding in the Department of Mysteries and the search for the prophecy.

"It is getting increasingly difficult to find ways around the Order members positioned there, my Lord. In the interest of staying undetected, I have had to recently put a hold on my movements."

Voldemort hissed, "You will find a way through, Rookwood."

"Yes, my Lord."

"Severus, how does the Order know to be in the Department of Mysteries?"

Snape composed himself, ordering his memories around to reflect what he would say, "My Lord, Dumbledore guessed that hearing the prophecy would be your goal. He wanted to station more Order members there and sooner in the year, especially after our brothers and sisters were broken out of Azkaban, but I persuaded him against such actions."

Voldemort lazily glanced into Snape's eyes to ascertain the truth. Finding only what Snape wanted him to see, he withdrew, temporarily satisfied.

"Lucius, the Ministry?"

"My Lord, I have been working with Rookwood to get into the Prophecy room and I will double my efforts to that effect. Fudge continues to deny your return, my Lord, and I have encouraged him on that path. He has proven to be easily manipulated, and several recent appointments to high offices can be worthy allies to our cause" Malfoy said snobbishly.

"Then continue as you have been doing" Voldemort dismissed him and he stepped back into his place in the circle.

"The giants?"

"Myself along with several others were able to interrupt the gamekeeper's visit with them, my Lord" Macnair said. "We convinced them not to join with the Order, and they will follow your will, my Lord."

"Excellent, Macnair. The giants will be put to good use soon" Voldemort almost smiled.

"I have come up with a new plan, my faithlful Death Eaters, to ensure Potter's demise" he turned to face Bellatrix. Snape was on edge, anxiously waiting to hear of this new plan.

"Tell me, Bella, how would you defeat Potter?"

She looked confused, as if expecting a trick question, "My Lord, you are far superior to him. I would kill him when he is away from Hogwarts, alone and defenseless."

Voldemort laughed, "And that, dear Bella, is why you will be the perfect tool of my plan, not its creator."

Bellatrix looked furious, but kept her gaze down. "Lucius?"

"I could not say, my Lord."

"Dolohov?"

He shook his head, "My Lord."

Voldemort laughed, "Surely you know the answer, my only _intelligent _servant?" He turned to face Severus.

Snape's stomach flipped, _I have no choice. He already has the plan and if I am right I booster his confidence in me._

He looked up, "My Lord, I wouldn't attack Potter."

The other Death Eaters looked on in surprise as Voldemort cackled again. "Good, Severus, very good" he turned to face the circle. "I shall explain, because many of you will be necessary for this.

Potter defeated me once- an error on my part- through no skill of his own. Since then he has shown an annoying tendency to escape and live and has evaded me three more times. What good would it do, then, do continue to attack him?"

Severus glanced around the circle, he could see Dolohov's, Rodolphus's, and Lucius's faces change with understanding and appreciation. Snape felt sick.

"So I will not attack Potter directly. The cunning warrior attacks neither body nor mind. Our targets this year will be everyone that Potter holds dear. Once they are dead he will have no reason to fight and will beg me for death. Which I will then grant."

The Death Eaters cheered and Voldemort held up his hand for silence "Wormtail, it seems you will finally be needed for something."

"Your job is to follow Potter. You will report to Severus as to who he is closest to."

"My L-lord. Potter and his friends kn-know my An-imagus form" Pettigrew wimpered.

"_Crucio_" Voldemort held the curse for only a couple of seconds. "Then do not be seen."

"Y-yes my Lord" Pettigrew mumbled.

"Severus" Voldemort turned his full gaze on Snape.

_Shit. This is it. _Snape focused on his Occlumency shields.

"My Lord."

"Have you broken the Order's mental defenses?"

He bowed his head, "No my Lord. I have failed y-"

The power behind the Cruciatus curse forced Snape on his back, knocking the wind out of him and pulling his already strained muscles. He thrashed on the ground for close to two minutes before the curse was removed.

"Leave" Voldemort hissed.

As one all of the Death Eaters except Snape apparated away.

"Severus." Voldemort sounded angrier than Snape had heard him since his return to life. "Care to explain?"

He did not even give Snape a second to answer, instead hitting him with the Cruciatus curse again. Snape curled into himself, struggling to breathe and fighting to keep his Occlumency shields strong despite the pain.

After a minute the pain lessened and Snape gasped for air, barely having enough energy to roll onto his stomach and raise himself on his knees.

"My Lord-" he was breathing heavily. "Dumbledore- keeping it- from me."

"Why?" Voldemort slashed his wand and the air in front of Snape condensed, pushing him backwards and landing him on his back. The air whooshed out of his lungs again and he coughed.

"Knows-I would- tell you" Snape's vision was clouding and his head was pounding. He could feel some of the tremors already wracking his body.

"Show me" Voldemort demanded. Snape had no choice, although he knew that keeping his barriers up and protecting the Order would sap the last of his energy.

He pulled the fake memory that Dumbledore and he had created just days ago to the forefront of his mind.

_Snape stood in front of the Headmaster's desk, facing the old man. "Black is my prisoner now, Dumbledore. The Dark Lord left him in my care."_

_  
"Good, Severus. We can use that to get him out soon."_

"_Get him out? There's no possible way that I can get him out alive. He's as good as dead. The only way for him to leave with his life is to give up some of the Order's secrets. If you give me access to his mind I can ensure that the Dark Lord only learns some of the trivial secrets, ones that you can use to your advantage" Snape looked eager. _

_Dumbledore sighed, "I'm sorry, my boy. I cannot trust someone who is so close to Tom with our most heavily guarded secrets."_

"_So you still don't trust me?" Snape spat. _

"_Of course I trust you Severus. I just can't take the chance that Tom will see those secrets in your mind._

"_Good enough to spy, never worthy enough to be trusted. I see how it is Dumbledore" Snape swept from the room, hatred burning in his eyes. _

Voldemort looked his servant over. "Severus. As I told you last time, your most important role is as my spy. Currently you are not doing a very good job. You will not fail me again."

Snape had risen to his knees once more, facing Voldemort and he braced for the Cruciatus again. The Curse pushed him forward, and he thrashed on his stomach for over a minute. When Voldemort lifted the curse Snape had one hand holding him up, the other clenched to his chest, trying desperately to ease the pain. As he did, though, he felt something that made his heart stop.

Glass chunks.

The poisons.

_No._

He desperately slipped his hand inside his robes, feeling wetness but unable to determine if it was blood or the potions. Trembling he traced the outlines of three vials. _One is the acid, it was in an unbreakable vial. One of the poisons must have broken._

As he began trying to think of which poison it was he suddenly blanched, remembering something.

_Yesterday, the seizures. In my rooms. I fell, cut my chest on the side of the desk. It bled a little._

_Cut my chest._

_It was bleeding._

_Whatever poison vial just broke is seeping through the cut into my bloodstream. _

_Fucking hell._

He was not given much time to contemplate his impending doom, though, as he heard his own curse, _"Sectumsempra"_ and cursed his foolish schoolboy-self as he felt white hot pain cross his back.

He cried out, the pain of the cutting curse shocking him. He took deep, gasping breaths as he watched Voldemort walk closer to him.

"Severus. You have disappointed me. I thought you were my most intelligent. My most dependable" he hissed. "You will get through the Order's barriers and learn their secrets. Do not fail me again."

"Yes-my Lord" Snape wheezed. He knew a dismissal when he heard one and knew that apparating now would almost guarantee splinching himself, but staying was not an option.

Focusing as much as possible he closed his eyes and apparated to the grounds just outside of Hogwarts. Only to be struck with all consuming pain.

It lasted for several minutes and when it started to dim all Snape could think of was, _at least now I know what poison it was. Damnable 'Vomica Domna.'_

He could only lie there for several minutes, waiting as the pain eased and trying to control his breathing and muscle spasms. He could feel his back bleeding and knew that something needed to be done.

_Magic is out of the question unless I want to suffer pain equal to that._

"Winky" he croaked.

The elf appeared seconds later, eyes wide and ears down. "Master Snape!" She ran over to him and gently touched his shoulder.

"Master Snape!"

"Winky" he said. "Get Dumbledore-and McGonagall."

She nodded and quickly apparated away. Snape tried to raise himself to his knees, but his arms couldn't support him and he doubted that he could stay kneeling even if he got in the position.

He was on the edge of losing consciousness when he heard a voice from far away.

"Severus!"

He opened his eyes to see McGonagall running across the grounds. Had he the energy he would have smiled.

As it was he could barely blink. "Oh, Severus" she cried once she had reached his side. She knelt down beside him, one hand on his shoulder, the other on his cheek.

"Minerva" he wheezed.

"Sh, Severus. We'll get you up to the castle and healed in no time. Just relax" she obviously doubted her own words, though, as her eyes were dark with worry.

"No-magic" he managed.

"What?" McGonagall leaned closer to him.

"Poison-Vomica Donum-no-magic" he said again.

"Severus what do you mean?" When he did not answer she shook him gently with concern. "Severus!"

But he did not answer.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I'm evil!!!!!!!!! Yay me. I'm also tired and sick, so that's where this chapter will end.

(1)- I meant to stay as close to canon before I started this as I could- only changing this after the beginning of Harry's fifth year. I realized as I was writing that the Azkaban breakout hadn't happened yet, so Bellatrix shouldn't be free. So we're going to pretend that the mass breakout happened towards the end of summer 1995, and that everyone's free now…yeah, that'll work…

The line 'The cunning warrior attacks neither body nor mind' is from Spiderman(the movie).

The vials in Snape's pocket are kept in place by the cloth and it prevents them from making any annoying glass sounds, which is why there's no noise when it breaks.

Sorry for the language (it _is_ rated T…)

And I think that's everything.

I would love to hear from you (thank you again to anyone who has already reviewed!)

Always,

Sinkme


	11. Chapter 11

Ch.11

Sorry everyone!! A bunch of my classes are coming to an end, as well as hockey playoffs, etc. so I didn't have a lot of free time. But now that's all done so I should be ok for the future.

Thank you to all of my reviewers and everyone who added the story/author alert or favorite- I live on your support!

Attyfan, wildtaz2go, excessivelyperky, linoria, arabellakye, sonia120462, klester (anon), rebeccaroy, galynSolo (anon), the haunting lady nightshade, jennie (anon), Kascade, cardigrl, lotiolentus, rythems angel, shuzu6616 (anon), it matters not, flawed imagination, young-and-free, wickedmagic, dverducci, jessie145, bzzyt, elif is there (anon), greengirl6, gemini artemis, jackline, skaterkep, Alicia (anon), dracosbaby, laiquendi, snapefreak(anon), liskaxy, Amanda (anon), dizziefan1, writergirlAD, elf (anon), InvaderV.A.M, Onatah1, Iva1201, Sonseeahray, ArcticSeasons, BuckeyeBelle, Raistlin24, lidiladilom, alienaileen, FireChildSlytherin5, kindli (anon), SilvaGirl, cloudsdriftby, The Ravenwolf, Sofia7, kittybloom21, Coconut Rum, ServalSpirit, KlingonGal8489, zule bean, soror noctis, Schwimmschik, kash (anon), tatajess, alphadelt, jonathonbenjamin, xyraeliemna, kithic, CharredQuill, MissPrincess1989, monikalukman, melethwen, erin5453, withthelightsout, deeps85, gibsonangelic, writergirlAD, his-crookedSmirk, storm tigress, a-zla, virja, amaya no shiori, skyfire29, tilism, granger-malfoy, fireyhell, Estante (anon)

For anyone who reviewed I tried to PM you individually and to any anonymous reviewers who have questions or bring up good points I'll answer them below:

Estante: Thanks for your review!!

Noway: You're right- usually Snape is smart and would be prepared (would have made sure the vials were unbreakable)- but this time he didn't check each vial because he's so stressed and he had so many things to get accomplished that a little spell like that just fell through the cracks.

Maintenance:

_Thought_

"Normal speaking"

"_Spell"_

_Nonverbal Spell_

"_Parseltounge"_

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Severus!"

McGonagall shook his shoulder gently once more, getting more panicked as the seconds ticked by and the man did not stir.

She looked up desperately to see Albus making his way over at an alarmingly fast pace for the old man.

He reached them, slightly winded, and dropped to kneel next to the fallen man.

"Oh, Severus" he put a hand on the spy's pale cheek. "I am so sorry."

When he didn't answer with a sarcastically out of place comment Dumbledore looked over to McGonagall.

She shook her head, "He hasn't responded for at least a minute."

Alarmed, Albus quickly reached to Snape's neck, sighing loudly when he found a pulse, albeit not as strong as he would have liked.

"Let's get him up to the castle" he waved his wand and conjured a stretcher and then turned his wand on the young man. "_Enner-_."

"No, Albus" McGonagall knocked his arm aside suddenly.

"Minerva? I know he'll be in pain but he needs to be awake to tell Poppy what happened" Dumbledore spoke much too calmly for the Transfiguration professor's taste.

"Before he passed out he said something about a poison and not using magic on him" McGonagall tried to remember the poison's name.

Dumbledore's face fell and his voice shook, "Vomica Donum?"

"Yes, that was it. He insisted that I not use magic. Albus, what's wrong?" McGonagall watched as the Headmaster raised his hands and buried his face in them.

"Albus! Severus needs to go to the Hospital Wing immediately. I don't know what that poison does but pull yourself together and help me get him on the stretcher" she paused. "Can we use the stretcher?"

He nodded mutely and helped McGonagall carefully place Snape on the stretcher. He silently manipulated it to float alongside them. "Minerva, go tell Poppy to expect us."

She nodded and ran ahead through the halls of the school. As soon as she was out of sight Dumbledore stopped, the stretcher stopped next to him as well.

"Forgive me, Severus." Muttering the incantation he cast a _Silencio_ and two Disillusionment charms in quick succession (1). His heart wrenched as Snape was torn out of unconsciousness, mouth open in a scream that couldn't be heard.

Dumbledore gripped the man's hand as Snape's eyes clenched shut and his chest rose and fell rapidly, trying to breathe the pain out.

Moving again they reached the Hospital Wing minutes later and Dumbledore guided the invisible stretcher into a secluded ward off to the side of the room. It was guarded by a portrait and the other entrance was through Poppy's office. Mostly it was used for when professors were sick and needed Poppy's supervision, but recently it had become Snape's unofficial room.

Muttering the password he slowly moved the stretcher ahead of him and guided it to the bed that was waiting. Poppy and Minerva were already there and waiting and they both looked confused when only Albus came through the portrait.

Watching her friend carefully Minerva noticed how extremely sad and old he looked. When he waved his wand, muttering _"Finite"_ she couldn't choose between throttling him and comforting him, but the choice was put to the side in favor of her injured colleague that had appeared with Albus's spell.

Gasping softly she could only stand there looking down at Severus, while Poppy moved around hurriedly. He was much paler than she had ever seen him and sweat had matted his head. He was trembling and moaning softly and she would have moved to comfort him had the Headmaster not beat her to it.

He stood out of Poppy's way, off to the side of the bed, but he was softly stroking Snape's head, and with his other hand he was mopping the sweat off of his brow with a handkerchief. Minerva couldn't hear it, but he was softly talking to Snape as well. She was almost furious with how calm the old man seemed, but something was out of place here, something was pulling at Minerva's focus, something Albus had said…_"As far as I can tell, he has had some degree of injury, mental or physical, after each meeting with Voldemort."_

And there it was, plain as day; Albus had been expecting this. Severus probably had too. Wiping away tears of surprise and anger, she turned to the Potions Master.

So far, Poppy had only examined him physically, since McGonagall had strictly warned her against using magic on Severus. With Minerva's help they were able to slowly turn Snape onto his stomach to get a look at the cursed wound on his back.

Grumbling to herself about Potions Masters who wear too many layers of clothes, Poppy worked to get off his robes first, to better see the cut. McGonagall hissed at the sight; it easily covered most of his back, making a slightly skewed diagonal line from below his right shoulder to the middle of his back.

Dumbledore turned silently to Poppy, who shook her head, "If this was the curse that I think it was than it's much too late to prevent a scar or even attempt to minimize it. I need to use magic, and the longer we wait the harder it will be close the wound."

Snape had been awake since the Headmaster used the Disillsionment and Silencing charm on him but the pain was stealing away his thoughts. He dimly heard Albus speaking to him, heard Poppy and Minerva in the background, but he felt as if he was a great distance away from them when they spoke.

He felt Dumbledore stroking his head again and he welcomed it, focusing all of his energy to that touch and anchoring himself to the world of the conscious. There was something important that he needed to tell Dumbledore but his thoughts continued to elude his fading consciousness and he stopped fighting after a while.

Dumbledore turned to Poppy, "There's no antidote for Vomica Donum, since, for all the pain it causes, it wears off on its own after a while."

Poppy interrupted, "That wound will continue to bleed the longer it goes unchecked, Albus. Severus can't afford to wait."

"I know" Dumbledore sighed. "Take care of his back first. Then we will determine the nerve damage and continue from there."

Minerva started, "Albus, what will the poison do if we use magic on him?"

Albus glanced up at his Deputy, then back down to Severus, "It was originally created to be given to prisoners. Just five drops inhibits the person's ability to do magic and makes any spell cast on them extremely painful (1). It's a block on a person's magical core, so that any magic that the person uses or has used against them must first go through the poison itself, which creates the pain, typically equal to the amount of power needed for the spell to work. Eventually Severus's body will recognize that the poison is harmful and will work with his magical core to expel it" Dumbledore's eyes hadn't left Snape's face the entire time.

Minerva's hands flew to her mouth, "And that- that _monster_ gave it to him, knowing what it did. And then cursed him. And Severus had to- had to _apparate. _Oh Albus" she buried her head in his shoulder, and he gripped her tightly.

Poppy had listened to Dumbledore's explanation of the poison as she carefully inspected the cut again, silently apologizing for having to cause him more pain by healing him.

As she raised her wand, thankful that Snape had taught her the proper way to heal the Sectumsempra curse, the man himself spoke.

"Dark Lord-didn't" he rasped. Poppy immediately conjured a glass and filled it with water, offering a small amount to the spy, who welcomed it gratefully.

Dumbledore knelt down near Snape's head and Minerva stood over Albus's shoulder. "What was that Severus?" The Headmaster put his hand on the injured man's shoulder.

"Accident-had-poisons in robes-it broke-cut on chest from-before" Snape said weakly. Minerva took his place by Severus's side as Dumbledore went over to the robes that Poppy had placed off to the side.

Searching for the front he opened the robes as if to put them on, and then ran his hand down the inside front, hardly having to search at all as he felt several bumps almost immediately over the left breast.

He pulled out the three remaining vials, and with them came several small pieces of glass. He put the vials safely down and out of the way, and on a second thought, inspected the vials magically.

The three vials had been charmed to be unbreakable, but from the remaining glass of the fourth vial he was able to tell that it hadn't been, otherwise it wouldn't have broken.

_It is unlike Severus to be so lax in regards to his potions. He didn't check each vial to make sure they were unbreakable, and he usually has more than just that charm on them. He is lucky to only have had one vial missing the charm if he never checked them at all._

He jerked back around when he heard Severus cry out before clamping his jaw down to muffle the noises. Madam Pomfrey was tracing her wand over the wound on Snape's back, muttering a singsong like incantation. After one spell the bleeding had slowed; two and it had stopped completely; three and the edges were beginning to knit together; four drew the cut together tightly; and the fifth closed the wound, turning it a vibrant white tinged with new pink skin.

McGonagall had been at his head, stroking his forehead and letting him clamp onto her hand with each time the spell was renewed. She frowned after the fourth time the healing spell had been cast. _It usually only takes two or three times to fully heal. _

Minerva felt Snape's hand go limp in her own after the last charm was cast; she looked worriedly over to Poppy, who moved quickly to check his vitals.

"It's just from the pain."

_Well that's a relief_ Minerva snorted. _As long as it's _only _from the pain. _

She looked over to Dumbledore, but the Headmaster seemed to be in his own world, still holding several vials of potions.

Poppy moved over to him, gently placing a hand on his elbow and startling him out of his reverie. "Albus" she gave him a soft smile that did not reach her eyes. "He's as stable as I can get him without any diagnostic spells. How long until the poison wears off?"

He turned to look back at Severus, "I don't know. It usually lasts no longer than two weeks. But the longer it takes Severus to regain full use of his magic, the more I fear for him."

"Can potions help at all?" Minerva asked Poppy. Glancing briefly at the Headmaster, Poppy shook her head slowly, "No, I don't think so, Minerva. Potions are derived from magical substances, and depend on the innate magic in wizards to work; it's the reason that we can't use them to help Muggles."

"I do not think that it will take long for Severus to recover, he's alw-" Dumbledore broke off as he turned to look at the younger man. He could see slight tremors wracking his body, the spy was shivering as if he was cold, but within moments the tremors had evolved into a full blown Cruciatus seizure.

Dumbledore rushed to Snape's side, trying to hold his shoulders down to keep his head and neck from thrashing too wildly. Pomfrey moved quickly to hold down his knees, she snapped at McGonagall, who was standing off to the side, "Hold his head Minerva!"

Blinking rapidly she moved over and gently held Severus's head, adding pressure to keep him stationary at certain times, but when the tremors did not abate after several minutes Minerva looked over to Albus, and then to Poppy. Neither had anything to console her with; Poppy was frowning and seemed to be counting under her breath, and Albus's usually clear eyes were clouded over in sadness.

Several more minutes passed in tense silence until Severus's fast and uneven breaths caught Poppy's attention. Abandoning her position she moved to hover over his chest, one hand over his heart and the other resting lightly on his jugular.

"Damn, his heart. Albus-"

The Headmaster placed a hand on her shoulder, "I know Poppy. Treat him as best you can. I will see what I can do in the meantime. Minerva can you-"

"Min-erva" Snape rasped. She knelt down near his head. "Potter-no Peter- _Peter_-watch rat…"

He coughed, and one of his hands came up to weakly cradle his chest, trying to still his overtaxed body. Minerva looked over to Dumbledore, confusion evident in her eyes.

"What about Harry and Peter, Severus?" Dumbledore leaned closer as well, close enough to see the pain and frustration in the Potions Master's eyes.

"Dark Lord-Peter…rat to watch-watch Potter" He coughed again, and his Albus could see his hands shaking and the sweat forming on Snape's already pale face.

"Tom has ordered Peter to watch Harry in his Animagus form?" Dumbledore confirmed, and watched as Snape nodded weakly.

He couldn't _not _ask, "How bad, Severus?"

The spy managed a grim smile, "Worth it. Potter's friends- Weasley's- others- they'll be next."

Dumbledore's mind was instantly grasping what Snape was telling him, "Tom's targeting everyone close to Harry?"

Again Snape nodded and heard Minerva gasp. Dumbledore seemed to be lost in thought, no doubt coming up with various ways to keep everyone safe, and Poppy had a restorative potion that he waved away.

She presented it to him again and he shook his head, trying to hold in the coughs. _The potion won't do any good when I'm poisoned and too weak to supplement the healing._

At a look from Dumbledore Poppy huffed and walked away, cursing Snape's obstinacy and Dumbledore for allowing it. As Minerva moved close once more Snape gave a hollow laugh and turned to look at her. "Cancel detention- won't be there- to enjoy it. Saturday with you."

Minerva could only stare for a minute, not understanding where Severus was coming from at all. When it clicked she almost smacked him on the shoulder, "Severus I could care less about that now."

She could have sworn that he sighed, "Foolish Gryffs."

Albus came over after that and Minerva vacated her spot to allow the Headmaster to sit on the edge of the bed. She watched as the two conferred, or rather as Dumbledore spoke softly to Snape and waited for any reaction from the latter.

Content with the knowledge that, for now, her colleague and friend was safe she quietly left the portrait room to try to sort everything out in the quiet of her chambers.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Brilliant green eyes flashed open, and a boy sat upright, breathing heavily and sweating. He gave a frustrated cry when he determined the time and lay back down on his pillow, angry and confused.

He dare not close his eyes again so soon after being loosed from the grips of his 'visionmare' as he had come to name them. For they weren't figments of his imagination, he just knew that these were real, and very disturbing.

Unwittingly he found himself replaying his latest vision;

_He couldn't remember what happened before, but he was suddenly very angry. How dare Severus fail him- _Snape?_- and in this regard, his most important mission to date. _

"_Care to explain Severus?" a cold voice asked. _

_Without a pause his wand cut through the air, "Crucio" and he watched as the wizard thrashed and screamed under the power of his anger. _What's going on? _It was a surreal experience- in the back of his mind he knew that this wasn't him casting the curse on his Professor, but on some level he could not pull away. He felt satisfaction well inside him and he cut off the curse. _

_Snape tried to explain himself, "My Lord- Dumbledore- keeping it- from me."_

_Of course he is you fool! _

"_Why?" he asked, more to question why Snape had not procured the information regardless than to question Dumbledore's motivations. _

"_Knows- I would- tell you." So even Severus has his limits; it has been a while since he's misinterpreted a question of mine._

"_Show me" Voldemort demanded. Harry was becoming so lost in this tangled game that he barely grasped the fact that he was slipping away._

And then he was awake; confused and tired, and debating on what to do with this new information about Snape, the traitor.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

No one was surprised when the Potions Master did not turn up for breakfast, but they were surprised when the Headmaster unexpectedly called for silence and stood from his spot at the Head Table.

"Good morning all. I regret that I must inform you all of a terrible accident that has befall Professor Snape-" now the hall was silent- "while he was brewing yesterday. An unforeseen reaction with an experimental potion has confined the Professor to bedrest for at least the next week. Until Professor Slughorn arrives to fill in I will be assisting the fifth and seventh year students in practicals while the other years complete coursework."

He watched the reactions of each House, as did McGonagall, and she was embarrassed and furious when several members of Gryffindor broke into smiles and laughs, high-fiving each other. To be fair it was not many, but compared to the carefully neutral expressions on the Slytherin's faces, the quiet thoughtfulness on the Ravenclaw's, and the tentative frown on the Hufflepuff's, Minerva could honestly say that she was disgusted with her House.

And she would change their attitudes very soon.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Contrary to popular belief, Dumbledore was not all knowing, neither was he all powerful, so when he glanced around each class he was teaching and recognized a face or a name and connected that child to an anecdote that Severus had related to him, he was glad that he only had to supervise two years worth of students brewing.

And for the most part the fifth and seventh year classes did very well; he learned with them that under no circumstances should even a pinch of sneezewort find its way into the cauldron too early. Luckily singed hair could be regrown.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Poppy was debating on what she should do. Normally when a Professor was ill and required attention they would stay in the room behind the portrait and she could monitor them with a long range spell to detect shifts in their general health patterns; breathing, temperature, etc.

But such a spell was not an option for the Potions Master. Unfortunately he did require constant attention, because the new nerve damage was worse than Poppy had seen it so far, and unless he was monitored he was liable to bite his tongue off or worse if a seizure caught him.

Not realizing that Severus was awake she fluttered constantly beside his bed, going back and forth about casting the spell.

"Just do it Poppy" he said tiredly.

"Severus, I can't" she protested.

"We both know that you'll do it in the end. Some brat will wander in eventually" he paused to take several deep breaths. "Just do it now so I can sleep."

She knew he was right, he was usually right when it came to his health, although he didn't take enough care of himself in her opinion, but that couldn't make her feel any better about the situation.

She didn't bother asking him if he was prepared, as he would only snap at her, so she raised her wand and cast the spell, and her heart clenched as the magic fought its way through the poison to take effect and Severus's body tried to repel the spell. When his breathing evened again she left a glass of water on his bedside table, as well as several potions that could help if he chose to take them.

She learned long ago not to expect Severus to change his mind when she argued with him, and if the potions were accessible then he wouldn't hurt himself trying to _Accio_ them later.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

It was all Dumbledore could do at the end of the last class not to sigh in relief. _Potions was never my strongest subject; my mind would always wander on some idea and then my potion would be ruined. It takes a strong mind and a stronger will power to teach this subject. And if Severus has any qualities it is those two._

He walked slowly to the Hospital Wing, nodding and smiling absentmindedly as the students greeted him. _Surely now- after Severus's own carelessness resulted in his poisoning- he will see that he needs help. I can certainly understand his reasons, but Miss Granger would be my first choice and I hope he can look past his prejudices to see how much she could help. _

Entering the Hospital Wing he was pleased to see that it was empty, no students to worry about seeing the main entrance to the portrait room, and no students in need of medical help.

He muttered the password and walked quietly to Snape's bedside. The man was sleeping, and if possible sleep made him look even more worn out. Frown lines on his face and premature wrinkles creased his forehead and face, the bags under his eyes stood out starkly against the sickly pale color of his skin, and his hair was matted down in places and sticking up in others.

He noticed with a frown and then a nod the potions on the side table, and then returned to surveying the young man in front of him until Snape seemed to be aware that he was being watched and slowly returned to consciousness.

Snape didn't even attempt to greet the Headmaster; instead he reached for the water next to him and took several small sips before turning to face Albus.

"You're looking better, Severus" he said benignly. Snape just snorted. "How is your back?"

"Stiff" he answered, not showing an inch of discomfort, although the fact that he had returned to lying down instead of sitting up to talk clued the Headmaster to how weak the other man really was.

"You should have told me sooner" he admonished gently.

"It would have accomplished nothing" Snape didn't pretend to misunderstand. "What would you have done that I hadn't already? Aside from asking the Dark Lord to ease up on my punishments?" he asked scathingly.

Dumbledore conceded the point with a nod of his head. "I should still like to have known, Severus. You are my friend and I worry."

Snape didn't answer, knowing how heavily he himself contributed to the old man's burden during a troublesome time.

The older man spoke, "The Order has been warned to look out for Peter, and the Weasley's and Remus have been instructed to not take any chances and always carry a Portkey on them."

Snape shook his head, "They should be safe for now. The Dark Lord started this plan some time ago, with the murder of Potter's relatives, although at that time there was no plan- just pointless murder. Now that he has a focus he will have patience. Maybe a classmate's family or even a classmate turns up dead or missing and with each victim Potter will feel the pressure building up until someone close to him is lost."

Dumbledore almost shuddered at the imagery of Snape's description, _so many innocents. _

The Headmaster tactfully changed the subject, "Severus you must acknowledge that you are too overburdened to continue in this fashion."

"I was unaware that I had been denying that fact, Headmaster."

Dumbledore pushed on, far too used to Snape's remarks, "You need help from-"

"I will not endanger a fifteen year old student just because you are too foolish to change your mind!" Snape's breathing was rapidly becoming shallower and he had to close his eyes for several minutes after he sat up to face Albus.

"Why do you insist on throwing this girl into my life, Albus?" he asked quietly, desperately.

The Headmaster was forced to turn away and give the reasons that sounded weak even to his own ears, "She is bright, already aware of your status in the Order. I think she can help."

Snape sighed, "'Had I but world enough, and time,' Albus, I would have liked to foster her knowledge of potions. As it stands now she is little better than a parrot, and is a responsibility that would be both unwelcome and dangerous (3)."

"I understand your concerns, Severus, but I cannot think of any other student who could aid you without threatening your position in both Tom's ranks, and the Order's."

Snape fell back against his pillow exhaustedly, reminding Albus that only last night Severus had come back close enough to Death's doorstep that this talk was unnecessary and taxing.

"You think about it, Severus. I will accept a compromise should you find one that pleases you" he stood and placed a hand on Snape's shoulder. "Rest now, and recover."

When the door closed Snape allowed himself a small smile; at times Albus seemed as Slytherin as any Malfoy, but at times like this his compassionate Gryffindor nature took over and gave Snape the leeway he needed to push his own agenda forward.

He already had a plan in mind, and with nothing but time on his hands for quite some time, he was sure he could have a solution by this time tomorrow.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

And we see Harry for the first time...

(1)Yes, Dumbledore can see through Disillusionment charms- if he can see through Harry's Invisibility cloak then he can see through a charm.

(2) The poison doesn't necessarily inhibit a person's magic- but for the person to use their magic they have to suffer pain equal to the power of the spell so the person always chooses not to use their magic. If this is confusing PM me or leave a review and I'll explain it the best I can.

(3) "Had we but world enough and time" is from the poem _To his Coy Mistress _by Andrew Marvell

So it's a little shorter than previous chapters- sorry.

Again- I'll probably be able to write the chapters and update at a better rate than I have been in the past, but I'm planning a major overhaul of my other Harry Potter story, Hope, and that might distract me.

Any suggestions? For Snape's characterization? Minerva? Albus? Thanks for reading!

Always,

Sinkme


	12. Chapter 12

Ch. 12

Thank you to all of my reviewers and everyone who added the story/author alert or favorite- I live on your support!

Attyfan, wildtaz2go, excessivelyperky, linoria, arabellakye, sonia120462, klester (anon), rebeccaroy, galynSolo (anon), the haunting lady nightshade, jennie (anon), Kascade, cardigrl, lotiolentus, rythems angel, shuzu6616 (anon), it matters not, flawed imagination, young-and-free, wickedmagic, dverducci, jessie145, bzzyt, elif is there (anon), greengirl6, gemini artemis, jackline, skaterkep, Alicia (anon), dracosbaby, laiquendi, snapefreak(anon), liskaxy, Amanda (anon), dizziefan1, writergirlAD, elf (anon), InvaderV.A.M, Onatah1, Iva1201, Sonseeahray, ArcticSeasons, BuckeyeBelle, Raistlin24, lidiladilom, alienaileen, FireChildSlytherin5, kindli (anon), SilvaGirl, cloudsdriftby, The Ravenwolf, Sofia7, kittybloom21, Coconut Rum, ServalSpirit, KlingonGal8489, zule bean, soror noctis, Schwimmschik, kash (anon), tatajess, alphadelt, jonathonbenjamin, xyraeliemna, kithic, CharredQuill, MissPrincess1989, monikalukman, melethwen, erin5453, withthelightsout, deeps85, gibsonangelic, writergirlAD, his-crookedSmirk, storm tigress, a-zla, virja, amaya no shiori, skyfire29, tilism, granger-malfoy, fireyhell, Estante (anon), pstibbons, tele-tubby-, Anabelle32, Tigerfanfrv, fire-forged, Athena Keating-Thomas, EtheralBeliever, ShadowCub, samuraiduck27, catsdragon72, grugster, snapecrazy, SpencerReid, Sunago

For anyone who reviewed I tried to PM you individually and to any anonymous reviewers who have questions or bring up good points I'll answer them below:

Estante: It will be a little rough for Snape in the beginning but he'll recover (eventually), and continue as he had been doing before. Of course Harry will do something idiotic (it's his nature), so Occlumency lessons and Potions classes should be fun.

Maintenance:

_Thought_

"Normal speaking"

"_Spell"_

_Nonverbal Spell_

"_Parseltounge"_

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

_The only thing worse than being a prisoner in the Hospital Wing is being a prisoner in the Hospital Wing when I'm not ill enough to sleep all of the time, _Snape thought as he awoke to what he imagined to be morning, he couldn't tell, of course, since he was in the room behind the portrait.

_This room wasn't meant for extended stay_ he observed dimly. _And I've woken here too often for my taste. I would usually be perfectly fine in my own quarters if not for that interfering Gryffindor and my ruddy House elf. _

Taking a few deep breaths he decided to first see what he could recollect; experience made him wary of moving his body before he could remember what landed him in the Hospital Wing in the first place.

_Starting with the obvious; I was summoned. It was a full meeting…no, just the Inner Circle. All ten of us were there. Who reported? Lucius most likely…yes, an update on the Ministry. Must remember to alert Albus and the Aurors to keep an eye on the Department Heads. Any of the Lestranges? No on three counts, they only lead raids. Pettigrew usually does even less- Pettigrew! I need to warn Albus._

Sitting up quickly he was forced back down, automatically wanting to curl into a fetal position to release the pain that clawed down his back, but it only made the burning worse and he forced himself to lay flat on his stomach.

_And _that_ is why we don't get up prematurely_ a sarcastic voice that sounded eerily like Minerva rang in his head.

He gave himself several minutes before he deemed his body ready for attempt number two. He turned slowly onto his side so that he could sweep his legs over the bed and onto the floor. He brushed off the light-headedness that momentarily stole his vision and noticed with a frown that he only had his pants and shoes on.

Glancing around warily he saw that his shirt was ripped and bloody and flinched at the size of cut in the back, _no wonder it hurt so much._

He shook his head once more, _I should remember as much of the meeting as I can before I go to Albus so that I can tell him everything at once. _

_Five of the other nine are accounted for: Pettigrew, Lucius, and the Lestranges. What else has happened recently…Hogwarts is secure, there are no plans to move against her at this time; Gringotts, Diagon Alley, and Hogsmeade are potential targets, but I don't think there was any mention of an attack. Lucius reported on the Ministry, but there's something I'm missing._

_The Department of Mysteries, of course! He knows that the Order has guards there. It might just be safer if Albus took Potter over holidays or something and retrieved the prophecy so as to remove it from the Dark Lord's grasp. And that would account for Rookwood's report._

_Six now, missing three. Dolohov? No. As the Dark Lord's assassin his assignments are rarely known to the Circle beforehand; he is one of my biggest concerns for the Order._

_Macnair and Mulciber. Mulciber usually leads attack teams, like the Lestranges, I doubt he reported anything._

_Macnair. Macnair. _He let out a frustrated sigh. _I usually don't have this hard of a time remembering what happened. _

_Focus. Breathe. _

_Macnair. Disposal of Dangerous Creatures. Creatures. Giants! They recruited the Giants. Damn and blast. _

_And then, then the Dark Lord spoke. His new plan…Potter? Not Potter…his friends. Target his friends. _

Ignoring the twinge in his back and his screaming muscles that hinted at time under the Cruciatus he stood shakily and grabbed his robes, making his way through the door at the back of the room, taking a chance that Poppy wouldn't be in her office, since he needed a shirt and she kept spare plain clothes for students and professors.

She was, mercifully, not in her office. As he bunched up a t-shirt in a size too large for him he couldn't hold back a hiss when the fabric came down and settled over the region where the cut must have been. Setting his jaw he braced himself as he swung his robes on, and wondered briefly what time it was.

Feeling around in his robes he located the pocket that held his wand and sighed as he felt the birch wood (1), but his relief was cut short as he felt a light vibration coming from his wand.

Curious, he sent a tendril of magic to his wand, wondering whether it had been tampered with, but he was met with a light jab of pain. Wincing slightly he remembered with a stab of annoyance, _the poison. Damn, how could I have forgotten?_

Grumbling with annoyance he glanced around Poppy's office until he found her permanent Tempus charm in the corner of her desk and realized that it was lunch.

_I hadn't realized that I slept so late. Of course, I have little memory of last night; I could have only been brought here early this morning, in which case sleeping so late would be normal. I need to take advantage of the empty halls and get to Albus's office. _

He did not relish the thought of walking to the Headmaster's office from the Hospital Wing, but as he couldn't stand the thought of Flooing at the moment and his ability to perform magic was limited, walking there was his best option. _Four flights of stairs are bad enough without crossing half of the castle. I would go to the staff room and use the staircase there but I'd rather not go near the Great Hall and have someone see me. _

His strength, though, seemed to return with each step, instead of waning as he had thought it would. He gave a grim smile as the weakness and shaking that often accompanied the Cruciatus Curse melted away and his step grew more confident.

He took each stair one at a time, not willing to chance his health because of his impatience, and soon found himself on the seventh floor landing. He turned in the direction of the stone gargoyle that guarded the Headmaster's office.

Giving it the password he moved up the spiral stairs and past the oak door. He entered the room, not surprised that Albus wasn't there, and took a seat in front of his desk. The portraits of the previous Headmasters and Headmistresses were mostly asleep; he would have liked to speak with Phineas Nigellus Black, but his portrait was empty.

Snape waited patiently, knowing that Albus usually returned to his office directly after lunch, as opposed to after the evening meal where he lingered and spoke with the professors. He tried to fill in some of the blanks in his memory of the previous night, but he could not recall anything else of value from the meeting and everything after the meeting was extremely vague. He would just have to wait.

In the mean time he allowed himself a smirk as he pictured Poppy's face when she returned from lunch to find him gone.

It had been hard, at first, to let her help him. He would return from meetings, report to Albus, and then the old man would force him into the Hospital Wing. It had been hard, too, for Poppy. She had often treated him when he was an angry and sullen boy, and a sarcastic, angry, and sullen man was even worse.

She was always professional when she was taking care of him. At first he thought that she was angry with Albus for making her heal a Death Eater and that her silence was her way of showing her disapproval of him. The Headmaster had assured him that Poppy knew that he didn't appreciate small talk and she wanted to respect his wishes. He had later learned, though, that it was a curious mixture of both.

She had, after all, lived through the First War. It was to her that the majority of the Order members had come to when they had been cursed or were wounded. And she had patched them up only for them to wind up back in her Wing only days later. She had watched with a broken heart as grim and serious men replaced the happy boys that she had known when they were younger and carefree.

Snape understood that she blamed him to a degree. Hell, he blamed himself a lot more than she blamed him. _And she's right, isn't she? How many of my potions helped heal the Death Eaters so they could go back out and kill and torture and rape more people? How many of my potions helped them kill and torture people?_

But time had helped heal the invisible scars that had been left on Poppy by the war, and time had also helped her adjust to Severus's presence. Him brewing the potions for the Hospital Wing had helped, of course. Now that she didn't have to spend the school's money on some of the rarer healing potions that were sometimes necessary she had been able to get access to better equipment and the like.

And of course there was the fact that there were far less incidents in Potions with him as the teacher. And the Slytherins toed the line much more often than they had when Slughorn had been Head.

It had been awkward the first time he came to the Hospital Wing when he was sick. To be fair, though, Minerva had dragged him through the halls after curfew insisting that he was too ill to protest her treatment and that he should "quit being a child and just go to Poppy."

She had been caring in a quiet, reserved manner and when he thanked her she paused, looked back at him, and smiled.

So naturally Poppy had been furious when she realized that Snape hadn't come to her after Voldemort's return and Snape's subsequent fall back into his life as a spy (2).

She started explaining the different healing potions to Winky, so that she could recognize them on her own and help Severus when Poppy herself couldn't.

He knew her mannerisms well enough by now; she was quiet and deliberate when he first woke up with serious injuries, and she smiled at him a lot. He knew when she started nagging him about taking better care of himself that he could sneak out of her care soon. She had a short temper for the first day or two after he first awoke, but she mostly exercised that anger on Dumbledore.

The old wizard had learned not to expect a kind word and a smile from her when he came to hear Snape's report after he woke up.

His musings were cut short when he heard the door behind him open. As he stood to greet the Headmaster his previous weakness assaulted him and he stumbled back into the chair.

"I had hoped that you would give yourself at least a day before coming here, Severus" he smiled. "I guess it was foolish to think such a thing."

"Headmaster" Snape inclined his head as the wizard moved to sit behind his desk, placing a hand briefly on his shoulder.

"I would have waited but as I remembered more from the meeting last night I did not want to wait and take the chance that something unfortunate would happen."

"Of course, Severus. You did, however, manage to convey some very important details while you were being healed last night" the Headmaster began.

Snape shook his head, "After the meeting I cannot recall what happened. I wanted to ensure that you knew what was necessary."

"And I will do my best to fill in any holes in your memory, should you desire to know what happened" Albus tried to probe the younger man's mind but he was, as usual, met with solid resistance.

"Your Occlumency skills never cease to amaze me, Severus" the Headmaster complimented. "It is most unusual to have someone proficient in both methods of Occlusion."

Snape accepted the compliment with a small nod but did not respond, instead steering the conversation back to the meeting.

"I will start from the beginning, forgive me if I repeat some things, I would rather be thorough than lacking.

The Dark Lord summoned just the Inner Circle last night. Rookwood has alerted the Dark Lord that the Order has people guarding the halls at night in the Department of Mysteries. It is only a matter of time until he breaks through, though. I do not think it is wise to leave the prophecy in such a vulnerable position. You should take Potter and retrieve it soon or arrange for it to be broken. It does us no good to have such a valuable weapon lying in the open."

Dumbledore shook his head, "The prophecy is adequately protected, and for the moment it is dividing Tom's attentions, forcing him to divert his forces and chase an object that will only weaken him further."

"Headmaster?"

"I'm sure you will see it in time, Severus. Now, who else reported?"

Snape gnashed his teeth together, angry at being kept in the dark, "Lucius informed the Dark Lord that several of the appointees to Department Heads and other high offices are sympathetic to their cause and will lend them support."

_He will be moving to take control of the Ministry sooner than we anticipated. _

"Macnair also reported, he said that he has persuaded the giants to fight with them. I was wondering whether Hagrid-"

The Headmaster broke in, "Hagrid made contact with them in the summer and mentioned that he had seen a couple Death Eaters in the mountains as well. I had hoped that the giants would remain out of the war altogether, but I fear that the prospect of roaming freely once more is too good for them to pass up."

Snape just nodded, "Headmaster, the Dark Lord has changed his plans in regards to Potter."

"Yes, you told me last night. Peter will be spying on young Harry and his friends. And Tom will target them. Will Peter be reporting to you?"

"Yes. But I fear that the Dark Lord is losing his trust in…" Snape was suddenly silent. _Why would he have the rat spy when I've spent five years watching the brat? Anyone with half a brain could tell him to target the Weasleys first. Granger's parents would be sitting ducks, the other Order members are well known in the Ministry, he can make a statement by killing the families of other students at any time. He has Black under his thumb._

_So why is he waiting?_

_  
It's true that I have been failing more of my assignments, but I can no more crack the Order's barriers than the Dark Lord can stroll into Hogwarts tomorrow. He knows that I cannot break through Black's mind, and yet he's left him alone. As bait? To see what I will do?_

_He's waiting for me to offer him a suggestion. _

_He already knows what he's going to do, just like when he decided to attack Potter's friends. He wants the confirmation that I'm up to his standard._

_So I'll need to offer to use Black to gain something. The potion will be perfect if I can finish it. Use it to test a new and unknown potentially lethal potion against an Order member, bring his body back, probably have the Dark Lord rough me up for effect, and pretend sorrow that I could not prevent his death. Reaffirm my vows to the Order and burrow myself deeper. _

_That's why he's been so frustrated with me. How long have I been missing this? He must have noticed that I've been too distracted. Last night, I remember something…he said 'Severus. You have disappointed me. I thought you were my most intelligent. My most dependable.'_

Dumbledore remained silent, having lost Snape's train of thought when the Potions Master trailed off. He knew that whatever Snape was thinking about was important, but that he was unlikely to know what it was. He watched with a calm face as Severus stared out of one of the many windows in the room. _Just as Severus is my greatest weapon, so is he my greatest danger. At every moment he is poised to strike, ready to defend, hoping to attack. I can only hope that Lily has enough influence to keep him firmly attached to the Light side._

He looked on as Snape blinked once, twice, and then returned his attention to the man in front of him. "Severus?"

"I apologize, Headmaster. Clearly I am not as well as I had thought" Snape said smoothly.

"Of course, my boy. You have done so much in the last day. I have Horace coming to cover for your classes for the week. Rest and recover" he gave the younger man a smile. "You should Floo back to your quarters, Professor. I've told the students that you had an unfortunate accident while brewing and will be confined to your bed. It wouldn't do for one of them to see you walking down the corridors."

Snape gave him a humorless smile, "Of course, Headmaster, I'll-" A frantic call through the fireplace interrupted him.

"Headmaster! Severus isn't here!" Poppy looked very worried.

"Do not fret, Madame. Severus needed to talk to me for a little. He is right here" Dumbledore smiled again. Snape groaned silently. He'd been hoping to escape to his dungeons and get some work done during his week off, but know he knew that Poppy would hold him hostage for at least three days before he could leave.

"Send him through, won't you Albus?" Poppy had a predatory smirk on her face. Snape got up without a word or backward glance and went through the Floo to stand in Poppy's office.

She shooed him to the room behind the portrait and forced him onto the bed, clucking over him and taking off his heavy robes. He hissed quietly as the weight fell off of his back and Poppy sent him a look.

"I would have wrapped that when you woke up this afternoon but you clearly had better things to do."

"I apologize Poppy. I did not mean to worry you" not a trace of sarcasm.

She snorted regardless, "Yes you did. You're as bas as a schoolboy when it comes to staying in the Hospital Wing and actually being taken care of." She ruffled his hair fondly.

"You really do need to take better care of yourself, Severus. You're much too thin and I can tell that you don't sleep enough. How are you feeling?"

"Fine" he said shortly. He hated when she nagged him, _does she think I don't sleep because it amuses me? If I had seven hours to waste every day of course I would rest properly. _

Poppy harrumphed; irritated that Snape was losing his temper already. "Sit and I'll wrap your back." He did so silently, not making a sound as she secured the bandages around the pinkish white line. _It's healed nicely, for as long as it took to heal, but it's sure to be tender for a couple of days. Dark magic like that won't fade soon._

"What do you remember of last night?" she asked.

He shook his head, "The meeting. Very little after that."

She bit her lower lip, while it was not uncommon that Severus blocked out the torture that he came back with, she was worried about the seizures.

"What is it Poppy?" he sounded weary and she hated to add to his burden, but something this important couldn't be ignored.

"You had a Cruciatus seizure last night. The worst I've seen. I lost count after four and a half minutes because your breathing was shallow and uneven. Severus" she sat down next to him. "You know you can't keep doing this much longer. Your heart cannot take this much stress, and I'm afraid of what will happen to your nervous system if you continue this."

He shook his head stubbornly, "I can't stop Poppy."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Minerva swept through the halls during her free period, heading to the Hospital Wing to visit Severus. She was still furious about the actions of her House this morning when Albus announced that Severus would be out for the week.

She greeted Poppy as she walked into her office and nodded in the direction of the room behind the portrait. "Is he awake?"

Poppy snorted, "Of course he is, stubborn man. He just got back from Albus's office."

"What?"

"You heard me. I almost did something I would probably regret later when I Flooed Albus and found out that Severus had been in his office talking" Poppy's face grew serious. "I haven't yet determined which one of them initiated the meeting but I had planned on keeping Severus in bed for at least two full days."

Minerva could see the worry lines creasing the matron's face, "Poppy, what's wrong?"

She sighed and Minerva watched as she sagged in her chair, looking more tired than she had seen her in a long time. She moved forward and kneeled, drawing the witch into a hug.

"I worry for him, Minerva" she said breathlessly, fighting off tears of frustration. "That damned man will not accept any help and soon I fear that it will be too late."

"Too late?" Minerva asked worriedly. "Poppy, dear, you have to spell it out for me."

"The seizures, Minerva" she said. "At the rate they're progressing he'll be facing permanent damage very soon. I know he's had them periodically throughout the past year, coinciding with his returns from You-Know-Who, but this year they've gotten worse and the damage is accumulating."

"Is there nothing to be done?" McGonagall asked.

Poppy shook her head, "Even if he stopped right now there's no potion or spell that I know of that will cure that kind of nerve damage or strengthen his heart. And there's no persuading him."

Minerva nodded glumly; Snape's stubbornness was almost as infamous as his sharp tongue. "Is he awake now?"

"Probably, he only returned moments ago" she looked at the door. "I hate that I can't help him any more but the poison would only undo my efforts. I'm sorry for losing myself Minerva. I should not have come undone like that and I definitely shouldn't have told you any of that. Besides the fact that patient information is confidential, Severus would be uncomfortable with you knowing something so important."

Minerva nodded, knowing that that was true, "You have my word Poppy that I won't reveal what you told me, especially not to Severus. And do not be so troubled, we all need to talk, and I would hope that you trust me enough to confide in me. Now, I'm going to go talk with Severus."

Poppy smiled as Minerva stood and walked into the room, but her smile failed as soon as her friend was out of sight. _I fear that these moments of rest will be too few in the future. Even as secluded as I am I can tell that the war is intensifying._

Minerva tried to hide her trepidation as she approached Snape. He was currently lying down, although she could tell that he was uncomfortable from his tense posture.

She watched silently from the doorframe as his hands alternatively clenched and unclenched until she remembered that that was how Severus dealt with pain.

Years of covertly studying her colleague had taught her to read his body movements and read his emotions from his hands. His face, and especially his eyes, as she had learned, he kept carefully controlled. To others, as to her at first, it would seem that Severus's eyes were easily read when emotions were high. His eyes flashed when angry, narrowed when suspicious, and glittered when mocking, but Minerva had learned that lesson the hard way.

Years ago, maybe five or six years after Severus had started teaching, Albus had sent her down to the dungeons to find him after he had missed a faculty meeting. She had knocked on his door, but when he didn't answer she went through hesitantly, "Severus?" She couldn't see him and she hadn't been in his rooms before this.

She heard his voice coming through one of the doors but she couldn't make out what he was saying. She walked over to the door she heard his voice coming from and opened it just in time for an explosion to send her crashing back into the main room.

She landed hard, her breath leaving in a quick gasp. She felt Severus kneeling next to her and tried to listen to what he was saying. "..foolish Gryffindors…wait…walk right in."

She tried to focus on his face but her eyes were still swimming and she had no wish to see the anger in his eyes at being interrupted. Her whole front hurt, her head and neck were burning, and a sharp word from her younger colleague was the last thing she wanted right now.

Sure enough when she opened her eyes and looked at his face his mouth was set and his eyes were hard. "What possessed you to come in when I told you to wait out here?" he hissed.

She didn't answer and could only groan when she shook her head. She felt his hands steadying her head, but they were careful, tender even. She blinked with surprise. His hands smoothed her hair back and she winced. His eyes narrowed but his hands were still gentle as they traced a growing bump on her hairline. She watched as he drew his wand out of his pocket, gently circling her head and she felt his hands gently stroking her head. His voice, though, betrayed none of his newfound concern.

"Maybe that will teach you not to barge into my private rooms when I am brewing. I assured Albus that the potion I was brewing could not be left alone and that I would not be able to make the meeting" he turned to look down at her once more. "So of course the only logical thing to do would be to enter my private rooms without permission and then attempt to enter my lab during an important and dangerous step in the brewing." His sarcasm was evident, but the whole time he spoke she could feel a minute amount of magic accumulating in his hands. He continued to berate her for her foolishness, and as unwelcome as it was she could recognize the truth behind his words.

He helped her stand; his burning eyes a direct contrast with his careful touch. "Is it too much to presume that you will stay put this time?" He didn't wait for an answer as he swept back into his lab and returned moments later holding a vial.

Putting it in her hand she noticed for the first time that he was shaking. "Severus?"

He shook his head, "That's a Pain-Reliever. Only take it if you need it." He led her to the door, a hand on her back. "I would suggest stopping by Madam Pomfrey if you continue to feel unwell, but the explosion was relatively controlled and the potion was not harmful."

Before she could so much as thank him she was in the corridor and the door was closed. It would take her many months of re-examining that night to even begin to understand the masks that he presented to the world on a daily basis.

It was a talent that she both envied and detested; complete control over one's emotions.

While she recognized that such control must have been hard won and even harder to maintain, she had often bristled at his derogatory comments about Gryffindors wearing their hearts on their sleeves. She had, of course, seen him truly angry; mostly relating to the mention of one of the male Potters or Sirius, but even then she was hard pressed to determine if he was actually upset or just maintaining his façade.

After all, bitterness and regret were much more Severus's style than all-consuming anger.

At the same time she wondered if Severus himself knew where his masks ended. For as long as she had known him as an adult he had been almost the complete opposite of what he had been as a child. Brooding where he had been sulky, devious where he had been crafty, controlled where he had been ruled by his anger; but there was no doubt that the boy he had been was still very much a part of the man he was now.

She moved forward quietly, trying not to alarm him, and gently placed a hand on his shoulder when she saw that his eyes were closed.

She felt him jerk under her touch and immediately sought to reassure him, "Severus" softly now. "It's Minerva."

It was odd to watch him wake up, if he had indeed been asleep, and although it would seem like nothing was out of place, Minerva had more than her fair share of dealing both with Severus and with sleepy students.

In the very limited experience that Minerva had with a newly conscious Severus she could not say that she was honestly surprised with his manner of sleeping. He barely moved in his sleep, his breathing was shallow and controlled, and he never failed to wake suddenly when something in the room shifted.

She had thought that even as paranoid and on edge as Severus was during the day, that surely he would relax in sleep. Of course she had imagined him acting that way; romancing his life as a spy and not really understanding the kind of focus that it would take to constantly be on one's guard. Years in Severus's company had forced her to abandon her foolish notions.

Besides that, he hadn't been asleep. She could tell because his breathing pattern never changed and when he opened his eyes they were already looking at her. She gave him a smile, "Hey. How're you feeling?"

He didn't bother with half-truths where Minerva was concerned when he was this tired, "Considering the circumstances, passable."

She snorted, "Do you even _know_ the circumstances?"

"Poppy informed me of the nerve damage," he said blithely. "The rest I can hazard a guess." A pointed look at his bloodied and torn shirt told her that he had suffered the effects of that particular torture only recently.

"And the poison?" she asked, careful to keep her voice neutral.

"That too" he said dryly. "So, have you cancelled Potter's detention?"

"Actually, no" she gave a smirk. "I decided that Potter could use a lesson in respect. He will be serving the detention with me at the same time as the original."

Snape seemed unimpressed, "Really, Minerva. There's no reason to hold his detention, unless he called you old?"

She half-heartedly glared at him, "No he didn't call me old. I decided that your detention would do just fine."

Snape snorted, "You're a horrible liar."

"Compared to you everyone is a horrible liar" she fired back, not even considering the impact of her words. "I'm sorry, Severus, that was uncalled…"

"I will take that as a compliment and then pretend I didn't hear it. So why are you here?"

"To make sure you were alright, of course. Winky had me out of bed in the middle of the night and running to the outer edge of the school only to find you barely conscious and bloody. Is it selfish that I want to reassure myself of your wellbeing?" She asked rhetorically.

He waved his hand as if dismissing her comment, "You shouldn't be involved in this, I don't know what I was thinking when I asked Winky to find you."

"Severus don't say that. I'm involved whether you want me to be or not. I want to help you" she reached out to take his hand but he slapped it away. She moved from her position next to him as he sat up with a wince. His black eyes were angry as he spat, "What makes you think that I appreciate your help? What justification do you have for poking into my affairs? Isn't one prying Gryffindor enough?"

Minerva could only hope that the sadness and rejection she felt wasn't completely displayed on her face, but she knew from the triumphant smirk on his face that he knew his barbs at hit their mark. Out of habit she glanced to his hands; they were clenched and shaking, a sign that perhaps he knew that he was hurting her but felt it was for the best.

"If you feel that way Severus, I shall of course honor your privacy" she said stiffly and swept out of the room.

When he heard the door close he fell back onto his stomach with a cry of frustration. _If ever there was something that I excelled in it is my unerring ability to push people away. _

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Alright. I wanted to get this out since it's been awhile since I've updated. I'm trying to work on my character development (hopefully I've improved), and I'll be working to tie some things together in the next couple of chapters. Sorry that not much happened but it will get interesting soon...

(1)- From what I can remember Snape's wand details were never explicitly stated. So in this story it's birch wood, 12 ½ inches, with a Runespoor fang core.

(2)- More will be explained later about Snape's career as a spy. It's not like in canon where he turned spy just before the war ended. But he wasn't on the Order's side from the beginning either.

Some stuff to look forward to: Snape's recovery, an idea about the potion, Minerva's punishment for Gryffindor, a look into the minds and motives of Dumbledore and Bellatrix (separately of course), a possible development on Horcruxes, the start of Occlumency lessons, Hermione sticking her nose where it doesn't belong, and a bunch of other things.

I can hear everyone griping about Dumbledore now. Take a deep breath! All will be explained in time. This is not an evil Dumbledore story but at the same time he's not rainbows and butterflies. It's a war and someone has to make the decisions. End of story. That being said, please feel free to tell me that you hate the way I'm writing him as of now. Keep in mind that this story is in-progress and I will be exploring his character later and through different point of views.

Please leave a note about the character development or questions you have and thanks again to everyone who reviewed!

Always,

Sinkme


	13. Chapter 13

Ch. 13

Thank you to all of my reviewers and everyone who added the story/author alert or favorite- I live on your support!

Attyfan, wildtaz2go, excessivelyperky, linoria, arabellakye, sonia120462, klester (anon), rebeccaroy, galynSolo (anon), the haunting lady nightshade, jennie (anon), Kascade, cardigrl, lotiolentus, rythems angel, shizu6616 (anon), it matters not, flawed imagination, young-and-free, wickedmagic, dverducci, jessie145, bzzyt, elif is there (anon), greengirl6, gemini artemis, jackline, skaterkep, Alicia (anon), dracosbaby, laiquendi, snapefreak(anon), liskaxy, Amanda (anon), dizziefan1, writergirlAD, elf (anon), InvaderV.A.M, Onatah1, Iva1201, Sonseeahray, ArcticSeasons, BuckeyeBelle, Raistlin24, lidiladilom, alienaileen, FireChildSlytherin5, kindli (anon), SilvaGirl, cloudsdriftby, The Ravenwolf, Sofia7, Thorny Daisy, kittybloom21, Coconut Rum, ServalSpirit, KlingonGal8489, zule bean, soror noctis, Schwimmschik, kash (anon), tatajess, alphadelt, jonathonbenjamin, xyraeliemna, kithic, CharredQuill, MissPrincess1989, monikalukman, melethwen, erin5453, withthelightsout, deeps85, gibsonangelic, writergirlAD, his-crookedSmirk, storm tigress, a-zla, virja, amaya no shiori, skyfire29, tilism, granger-malfoy, fireyhell, Estante (anon), pstibbons, tele-tubby-, Anabelle32, Tigerfanfrv, fire-forged, Athena Keating-Thomas, EtheralBeliever, ShadowCub, samuraiduck27, catsdragon72, grugster, snapecrazy, SpencerReid, Sunago, Minnie Piaf, rara4444, Jessie-t84, ghost904, melethwen, drsues , Sythar, Stalinia, Goldenbird, alienaileen, Emeryx eyes, ippogrifo, Bebe Flow, Thorsten P Ziegler, mad modanisuto, Anna (anon), magicard, The Stick King, PBrules, puddlesofemotears, Varda35

For anyone who reviewed I tried to PM you individually and to any anonymous reviewers who have questions or bring up good points I'll answer them below:

Maintenance:

_Thought_

"Normal speaking"

"_Spell"_

_Nonverbal Spell_

"_Parseltounge"_

_  
_What can I say? It was hard to write the first part about Bellatrix and I wouldn't let myself move on until I finished her stuff. Aside from that folks, I have no excuses…so enjoy and try not to be mad at my delay

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Bellatrix Lestrange walked into the parlour of the Lestrange Mansion. While it wasn't nearly as old or prestigious as the Noble and Most Ancient House of Black it did have a certain charm that was sorely lacking in the Black House ever since her dear aunt Walburga's passing.

The size of the mansion was, of course, to be expected; the Lestranges were not as old as the Malfoys, and certainly not as old as the Blacks. They only had one main family house and two smaller country houses, after all. The Blacks had Grimmauld Place for the male heirs but the Black women were well provided for as well, with a large, well-protected house close to the Malfoys and several smaller houses. But the Lestranges were notable enough to marry their eldest son into the Black family.

The Mansion was acceptable, all things considered. There were five floors total, with the basement and attic both being fit for guests. _Well, the basement was fit for Snape, at least._ She sniffed, remembering her horror when she discovered that Rabastan and Snape were on good terms, apparently good enough to have converted a section of the basement as a potions lab for the bat. _Seems like almost every house has a lab for that half blood. If only that Mudblood had minded her own business Snape would have been ours from day one._

Everyone had assumed that one of Snape's friends- and she used the term loosely- had brought him to the attention of the Dark Lord.

What no one except herself and the Dark Lord knew was that it had been Bellatrix herself that had first told him about Snape. His blood status was, of course, unfortunate, but the Dark Lord's overwhelming need for a Potions Master had spurred her to tell him secretly about young Snape's promise when he was still a Sixth Year.

Bellatrix had been a Seventh Year with Lucius when Snape had started at Hogwarts. Many of the young Slytherins in that year had connections with the older students and Lucius and Bellatrix had pounced at the chance of guiding the lonely and vulnerable boy.

He had had to be taught the unwritten rules of Slytherin since his good for nothing mother disgraced herself and refused to use magic anymore- Snape had known next to nothing in terms of social customs and proper decorum in public. After they left, his years of fighting with Gryffindors did not help his cause either. Under Lucius's wing Snape proved to be a quick study, but a childhood of being left to himself let his soon to be famous temper loose one too many times for many of the older Slytherin's tastes.

They had dealt with him, of course. Slughorn was good about letting the upper years handle the House, he hardly ever interfered with the day to day affairs, and the result was a tight-knit House that was reliant on only themselves. Even after she and the other upper years had left, they continued to hold their sway over the younger students.

Bellatrix found herself thinking back to remember what a First Year Snape had been like. _Quiet and amusingly cynical. He was hard to intimidate at first; his brute of a Muggle father I'm sure contributed to that. She and Lucius had taken turns in teaching the boy, molding him to be the perfect Slytherin: independent, clever, ambitious, and morally grey. _

The Dark Lord had been willing to overlook Snape's mixed blood in favor of gaining a strong supporter. But the stupid fool had been determined to hold onto his feud with the Gryffindors, and even past that he wanted to attain his Master title in Potions.

While the Dark Lord could certainly understand the boy's need to prove himself, Bellatrix was furious at the boy's idiocy. How could a certificate from a washed out old Potions professor compare with serving the Dark Lord, even learning from him?

She found herself remembering the old days, the glorious days before her Master was temporarily defeated by the Potter brat (1). He had been so devious and cunning that it was no wonder that the majority of his followers were Slytherins as few others could understand or admire his ultimate goals. He had grand plans for taking back control of the wizarding world and returning power to those who deserved it instead of the rapidly encroaching Muggles and Mudbloods. The Death Eaters were his most loyal and to be branded was a sign of your high status.

Back then there were hundreds of followers, many were of old Pureblood families that had married into Mudblood lines and wanted to retain their noble heritage. The days of the Pureblood supremacy were quickly dying out as many old families were being withered away with Squibs and intermarriage. The older, frailer members of high society had pledged their funds and children to the cause, but every supporter did not endure the fighting or the raids that the War was infamous for.

Bella had had one of the most honored spots in the Inner Circle. She was his leader in the field. His lieutenant. Trusted advisor. She and Rodolphus became legendary in battle; she had heard that the official order for Aurors was to not attempt to engage her in a duel unless they were backed up with at least three other Aurors.

She owed most of her ability to the Dark Lord, of course. His handpicked leaders, only of the best quality, were instructed by him personally. Due to her family and lineage she had been educated from a young age in the ways of magic, both wandless and with a wand, but she had not showed any affinity for wandless magic. Her spells were much more powerful with her wand so why would she bother learning weaker versions?

Narcissa, when she had been forced to study, had been rather powerful as well, but her sister preferred to fight with words and tricks rather than with wands. Andy, as she recalled, had been a rather powerful witch as well, but she lacked the motivation to flaunt and increase that power.

Under Lord Voldemort's tutelage, however, she had flourished. She had discovered her affinity for the Dark Arts before Hogwarts but had lacked the necessary time and teachers to develop her skills at school. The Dark Lord had seen to it that her education in magic was no longer lacking.

_It had been so easy to follow him_ she reflected. _Intelligent in all the ways of magic, handsome, charismatic, dark, and so very cunning. _She blinked, surprised with her own thoughts. _Those days are long gone _she chided herself.

As the war progressed, many of the Death Eaters, Snape and Lucius among them, had noticed extreme changes in the Dark Lord. Angry and bordering on crazed, his moods shifted too quickly to keep track of up until his defeat.

She snorted, _as if the Dark Lord could be defeated. _And turned her mind to more recent matters- Snape.

No way was she letting that traitor- and she knew he was a traitor- take her place at the Dark Lord's side. She had a plan in mind that wouldn't require any immediate work on her part and would coincide with one of her Lord's plans.

It seemed as if Pettigrew was finding many ways in which to be useful in recent days.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Snape lay brooding on the bed in the room behind the portrait. Poppy had insisted that he spend at least one more full day under her care and after making the expected protests, he had relented. After all, there was little he could do with as weak as he was feeling currently.

He felt a faint trace of guilt at how he had pushed Minerva out earlier, or yesterday, there was no sense of time in this room. _It's better this way; in the long run being friendly with me will not endear her to either side. _

_Along those lines, I will need to request a meeting with the Dark Lord as soon as I am able to regain control of my magic. I must offer something as far as Black is concerned, and I have to carefully question his choice of Pettigrew as an additional spy on Potter. _

He wondered if there was nothing to be done to hurry his recovery from the poison. Attempting to use his magic more often might encourage his body to combat the block more quickly, or it might weaken his defenses and prolong his suffering.

_Damn. _He gave a brief thought to how the Dark Lord had originally planned to use the poison; _it would have been a good thought to offer to poison Black with it._

Either way it was a moot point with the poison beyond the Dark Lord's reach for now. In an effort to relieve his boredom and to do something productive, he began to mentally prepare the poison; starting with the ingredients and moving on to each step he carefully outlined the potion.

_Where, then, does the block on one's magic come from?_ _It must come from one of the naturally magical ingredients for it to recognize the magical core that separates wizards from Muggles, but there's something else- something that keeps the poison from simply eating its way through the core, something that keeps it bound, only to spring when the person's magic is tapped. It's almost as if it was two separate potions acting as one; one to block someone's magic exclusively and shelter the core and one to react when the magic is required._

_Two potions as one…_

Snape sat up suddenly, choking on the pain that the movement caused and then ignoring it in light of his current thoughts.

_Combining them outright didn't work; they're too unique to accomplish their goals as one new creation. I need to mask the Draught of Living Death within the Cruciatus potion, allowing it to lie dormant until it is triggered. The sopophorous beans are key in getting the drinker into a deep enough sleep for the rest of the potion to feign death. Putting in a smaller amount should hopefully slow the time it takes for the body to succumb to sleep. If I'm lucky it will be long enough for the tremors to occur and be believable. _

_Now to get out of here unnoticed. _"Winky!" he called.

The elf 'popped' a few feet away from him, shooting him an incredulous look. "If you think I will help you escape, sir-"

"Winky, this is an urgent matter."

"So is your health" she retorted. Damn he was regretting letting Winky help around so much in the Hospital Wing. Actually, he was regretting calling Winky at all, _shouldn't I have known better than to expect that she would help me leave?_

"At least bring me a parchment and quill," he conceded. Winky looked suspicious as she 'popped' away and reappeared moments later, handing the requested items to him. It was always better to win the small battles when possible, a hard learned lesson from his school days.

Winky watched as Snape furiously scratched his ideas out on the parchment, waiting only another moment before 'popping' away again, content in the knowledge that Madam Pomfrey would not let him escape again.

Snape hardly noticed her leave, so intent was he on getting all of his thoughts down and outlining the new direction he would take the potion in.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Hermione sat at lunch, completely oblivious to everything going on around her. When the Headmaster had announced that morning that Professor Snape would be out for a week she had been ashamed to watch her House's reaction.

Ron was immediately all grins, slapping Harry, Seamus, and Dean on the back. Harry gave a grim sort of smirk and joined Ron in imagining the next couple of classes without Snape to harass them. All down the table there were smiles and high-fives. She turned her gaze to the Head Table where she saw McGonagall looking as angry as she had ever seen her. _They'll get what's coming to them_.

Her morning classes passed rather slowly, especially considering the fact that she was ignoring Harry and Ron for their childish display at breakfast. It was all she could do to distract herself enough to keep her mind wandering to the topics she desperately needed to think on: Dumbledore, Snape, and Harry.

She refused to allow herself the quiet time necessary to sort through her rather confusing thoughts, hoping that if she ignored it for long enough that she would forget it. Often all it took was a glance at her hand for her hidden fury at Umbridge to rise up and consume her mind.

She had decided against going to McGonagall, for the same reasons that she had chided Harry on earlier were now demanding her silence. Besides, personal revenge would feel so much better than simply tattle telling on the toad this early in the game.

More worrying for her, though, was Harry and the ever-looming war. As sheltered as they were at Hogwarts not everything could be kept out, and from her careful perusal of the _Daily Prophet_ every morning, things were slowly escalating.

Little stories in the back of the paper: stores destroyed or ransacked, people going missing, certain departments in the Ministry being drowned in sightings of Dark wizards and questionable artifacts; it was these articles that told the story that the front page editorials wouldn't. These all added up to one conclusion, and Hermione thought that Fudge was a fool to continue denying Voldemort's return.

Their education in the one subject that might prove most helpful in the next couple of years was sorely lacking, and Hermione's heart clenched at the thought of another year wasted. But whenever she tried to talk to Harry and Ron about the war or about practicing their Defense skills, they shrugged her off, or rather Harry shrugged her off and Ron kept on Harry's good side and followed his lead.

It was infuriating to watch them play chess or talk about Quidditch when they could be doing something useful; either as basic as homework and studying, or as proactive as looking up the hexes and curses they should be learning this year.

But if she was perfectly honest with herself, practicing Defense skills on her own if necessary was not something she would be inclined to do. For as much as she nagged the boys about it, without them she wouldn't act on her own.

Her society for house elves had fallen on its face rather spectacularly, and with minimal support from Harry and Ron, she had found that her efforts alone had amounted to nothing. She had no doubt that if she were to attempt to sneak out- to where she didn't know- and practice hexes and curses on her own, she would most likely be caught, and even if she weren't, nothing practical would come from the practice.

Which left her exactly where she currently was; bossy know-it-all of the group. She grimaced at the rather harsh truth, but it was nothing she hadn't already been called to her face.

She felt a hand on her shoulder and gave a weak smile as Harry and Ron indicated that it was time to head to Herbology.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

He had noticed that Hermione had been rather subdued of late, but his anxiousness over Harry's rapidly deteriorating and alternating moods had demanded his attention. _Besides, Hermione's bright, she'll figure out whatever's bothering her soon enough and then I'll wish she'd stop laying into me about doing my work._

It was a hard job; this balancing act that he was always required to stay on top of. But after growing up with five brothers and a sister, Ron had learned all he needed to about silent support and distracting gestures.

He had long ago lost all of his previous hero-worship of the Boy-Who-Lived, more recently his jealousy had accompanied that wide-eyed awe that was associated with Harry. Years of living together had taught him that there was more to his friend than anyone could know. Harry had a much harder life than anyone deserved to, and in between nightmares, visions, and the frequent outburst when he was scared or angry, Ron had a pretty good idea of what plagued his friend in the middle of the night.

He held his tongue though, everyone was entitled to his demons, and Harry's scars went much deeper than the one on his forehead hinted at. If and when he was ready, Ron knew that Harry would talk to him.

Recently, though, his moods would swing at the drop of the pin and Ron was almost out of tricks with how to deal with his closest friend. Chess and Quidditch could only distract him for so long, and judging by the first couple of classes, Umbridge would do all that she could to bait Harry, not to mention the greasy git and his never ending feud with Harry.

Ron sighed, wishing that Hermione would see what he saw and recognize that he was doing what was best for Harry.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

As he often did when he found himself with a spare moment, Albus Dumbledore felt himself being swept away to the days before the war. Well, before this war. As painful as Grindewald's deviation from their plans had been, Dumbledore had only barely joined that war at the end, and only then it had been to confront his one time friend. He had been young then, not the wizened and dependable leader for the Light, just another boy who had stepped forward to end that nightmare all those years ago.

In the dark recesses of his mind he could admit to himself that defeating Grindewald had probably been the peak of his life, in terms of power and control went, and he had enjoyed it. He had never fully given up on his dream- his and Gellert's dream- and relished in the prestige and power that being a hero of war granted him. He continued to stay in the limelight after that, always academically, and always for the greater good, but in all the times it was offered he never accepted the title of Minister of Magic. It was a confining job and demanded a certain flexibility to bend to public demands; the fact that the people wanted him there, though, was enormously gratifying.

It was soon entirely overwhelming, though. As much as he enjoyed the power, he recognized his Achilles heel and took a job at Hogwarts, molding the young minds of countless generations as a professor, and then much later, as Headmaster. It was much more satisfying of a position and it was much easier to keep himself in check at Hogwarts.

Then the first war had broken out. If he was perfectly honest with himself, he had seen the outbreak of the war a long time before it occurred, it was why he created the Order as quickly as he did. It was why he had carefully monitored certain students as they made their way through Hogwarts' hallowed halls. It was why he started gathering sources and laying the chessboard so early.

Manipulator. Puppet-master. Interfering.

He had heard them all before over the years. Some people, mostly the Ministry, had had a hard time accepting that sometimes the pieces just fell perfectly into place for Albus Dumbledore. Sometimes he had a hand in how the pieces fell, sometimes he had chosen the pieces beforehand, and sometimes everything worked itself out without any help. But he had done what was in his power to ensure that the Order of the Phoenix and her members survived the war.

They had no idea the extreme pressure that he felt every day. Every hour. Every minute. It was never ending. All-encompassing. It was why he went out of his way to find the goodness in others, to overlook their demons and shadows and reach out to them. Maybe in doing so for others, his own shortcomings might be forgotten for a moment.

He allowed himself an indulgent smile; _Severus won't soon let me forget._

Severus. It had been a gift in the first war when Severus Snape had come to him, weeping and penitent, offering him anything in exchange for Lily Potter's life.

He had been horrified and disgusted at first that a schoolboy grudge could endure so long and so strongly as to disregard an innocent life, but the opportunity had been enormous. Lily and James were two of Dumbledore's strongest supporters and were vital to the Order. The fact that Voldemort considered them important enough to target them directly was worrying. The war was still fairly young; only in its fourth year, and to lose two key players would devastate the Order. On Snape's initial request, no one, especially not the Potters, were to know of his activities for the Order.

They had managed to keep the Potters safe and one step ahead of danger for a year and a half before Dumbledore started to notice some slight changes in his spy. In the beginning Snape had been hard to control, difficult to talk to, and overall unpleasant to be around. His reports were succinct and bland and Dumbledore hardly saw the man other than that.

The conditions were necessary, of course; at that time Snape had absolutely no excuse to be anywhere near Dumbledore. They would soon implement a plan and have Snape offer to spy on Dumbledore for the Dark Lord, but that was months away. Snape did not attend any of the initial meetings of the Order and knew of only a handful of members.

But after that first year and a half, Dumbledore noticed a change in Snape's mannerisms, in his reports. They were barely there, so tiny that at times he wondered if he wasn't imagining them. It had been after a close call with one of the safe houses that the Potters were using- Snape had managed to get word to Dumbledore only moments before the Death Eaters had surrounded the house, and Lily and James were through the Floo to Hogwarts as Voldemort himself crossed into the threshold of the safe house. Snape had been hidden by a charm in the corner of the room as they had tumbled out of the Floo, disheveled and frightened. Lily had immediately melted into James's embrace, clinging to him tightly as if to reassure herself that he was still there and not back at the safe house with a Dark Lord who wanted them dead. Remus, Sirius, and Peter appeared soon after that and Dumbledore heard, rather than saw, his spy quietly leave the room.

Snape started to bring more information after that, and not just information concerned with the Potters, as he had previously done: the movements of other Death Eaters, particularly the LeStranges, an increasing number of dark creatures, planned raids on Order homes and the Ministry, but most important was the updated list of members that Voldemort kept and who he would target.

The Order was soon seeing results with this new influx of information. All of the sources aside from Severus that Dumbledore had looked into were too seedy to be fully trusted and very little of the information they provided could be looked into. At the same time, though, Dumbledore had to balance the incoming reports with worthwhile information that Snape could take back to Voldemort.

Already he could see the effort that this double life was taking on Snape, he had seen no physical evidence to suggest a problem with Voldemort, but Snape was a talented Potions Master and healing potions were certainly not beyond his reach. He took more of an effort to talk with the young man and found that he was growing accustomed to Snape's dark humor and stiff personality. Between the two of them they usually managed to complete a newly patented potion to help Remus control the wolf inside of him once a month, although it had been hard to convince Snape to help him at all.

Soon the war began to really rage; Inferi, raids, rising death tolls, and Dumbledore found himself being pulled in every direction, expected to lead and fight and inspire and offer hope and he was finding it more difficult to do so by the day. His respites usually came when Severus gave his reports- it was just too much effort to keep up appearances and he knew that it didn't matter to Snape.

After all, he hadn't ever really looked up to the Headmaster when he was at school, and out of everyone in the Order, besides Alastor Moody, Snape probably had the best grasp of the realities of the war. There was no need for Dumbledore to put on airs when Snape was there and Dumbledore was immensely grateful for the time he had with Severus where he could plan the Order's next moves with an equal who would argue his points and stubbornly refuse to back down rather than with his lieutenants who would never dare refuse one of his ideas.

It had been both a welcome and completely uprooting experience when Voldemort had finally decided that Snape would be the perfect Death Eater to get close enough to spy on Dumbledore and sent his follower into Hogwarts to apply for a job.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

His hand had cramped from writing as much as he did, and notes were frantically scratched in the margins and anywhere else they would fit as he thought of different combinations or layering spells or additional potions that could work.

Eventually he found himself bored once more and asked Poppy if he could at least get some grading done while he was confined to bedrest. She had initially refused, wanting him to actually rest before he returned to his dungeons tomorrow, but he had insisted that without something to do he would go completely mad and attempt to leave that night.

So he forced his tired hand to refill his quill, striking lines through the odd paragraph or word here and there from the stack. He smirked as he looked at the inkwell that Winky had brought him from his desk- it was the Portkey to his rooms in Voldemort's castle. He would wait until his strength was more recovered, but it was good to have it on his person should something happen and he needed access to Voldemort or Black.

In the meantime he set the essays aside, they were dreadful anyway, and focused his attention on finding a solution for Dumbledore's misguided notion that he needed a student's help so desperately.

When he actually thought about it he couldn't deny that it sounded appealing. He could never let her grade anything, but some of the more mundane and time consuming tasks: cleaning the cauldrons, preparing ingredients, checking the equipment, taking inventory, could surely be lifted from his shoulders.

But he could never let Hermione Granger be that solution. Most importantly it would put him in a horrible situation with the Dark Lord, and she would annoy the hell out of him. But maybe with another student, another Prefect even, the work could be accomplished in even less time and he could turn this situation to his favor.

It would have to be a Slytherin, definitely not Draco; putting Draco and Granger in the same room in that type of situation would leave him suicidal. Parkinson would have similar results. Bulstrode, Crabbe, Goyle, and Davis were not competent enough in Potions to even consider. Theodore Nott would have been a good option, but his family was already firmly on the Dark Lord's side. He needed a neutral party. There were really only two students left- Daphne Greengrass and Blaise Zabini. Of the two of them, Blaise was better at Potions, and although his family was tentatively staked in Voldemort's camp, the Greengrasses could be more aptly called neutral.

_But Blaise is much more likely to annoy Miss Granger, _Snape smirked. _Albus will see that another student is the best option for all involved and will certainly not begrudge me an extra set of hands, and that will take care of any of the know-it-all's attempts to pick my brains or do extra work relating to the Order. I do love it when a plan comes together so nicely._

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

(1)- I know in canon Tom Riddle Jr was supposed to be so changed that by the time he emerged as Lord V no one recognized him or could connect him to who he was in Hogwarts. I'm changing that. In this story he made the Horcruxes while recruiting his Death Eaters, thus some of them remember him at different stages in his transformation from Tom to Voldemort.

I hate putting long things at the bottom because it inflates the chapter length but this is important.

For anyone who is wondering about the relative ages of the characters…

In attempting to find the years that each main character entered Hogwarts so I could attempt to smooth out some stuff I found that very few of the ages/years matched so I have key years below. These are the years and ages I'll be using in the story from this point on- sorry if they don't match something from earlier but I'm fairly certain that they won't contradict anything written so far. Not all the characters are listed below. (Most of the credit for this goes to hp-lexicon):

First year at Hogwarts:

1938ish- (Relative age 68/immortal)

Tom Marvolo Riddle

1963- (relative age 43/ depending on birthday)

Rodolphus Lestrange, Selwynn, Rowle, Macnair, Yaxley, Antonin Dolohov

1965- (~41)

Lucius Malfoy, Bellatrix Black (I know I royally screwed the years up with the Black sisters but nothing was working the way I wanted to so this is how it's going to be)

1966- (~40)

Andromeda Black

1967- (~39)

Narcissa Black

Ted Tonks

1971- (~35)

Severus Snape, Rabastan Lestrange, Wilkes, Mulciber, Evan Rosier, James Potter, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, Petter Pettigrew

1982- (~24)

Bill Weasley

1983- (~23)

Charlie Weasley

1984- (~22)

Nymphadora Tonks

1987- (relative age 19)

Percy Weasley, Oliver Wood

1989- (~17)

Fred and George Weasley, Lee Jordan, Angelina Johnson, Alicia Spinnet

1990- (~16)

Katie Bell

1991- (~15)

Harry Potter, Ron Weasley, Hermione Granger, Draco Malfoy, Blaise Zabini, etc.

1992- (~14)

Ginny Weasley, Luna Lovegood

The stuff that I promised at the end of ch 12 will still be coming up- I had never planned to fit it all in this chapter.

I wanted to develop a more complete Bellatrix and short of laying it out word for word this was the best I could do. I want a fuller character than the sadistic and insane bitch that is in canon, let me know what you think or if I should abandon that quest.

Dumbledore? Like/hate? I'm not sure how I feel about his section yet…give it some time. We will be seeing more of his pov- I've found that he's interesting to write, and more of the first war needs to be told- I realize that I changed a lot about the first war so bear with me.

Thank you for your patience!

Always,

Sinkme


	14. Chapter 14

Ch. 14

I really appreciate all the alerts and reviews after I added the delay chapter and I ended up re-reading my last chapter and getting back into it so I had to write this before I started studying for finals.

Maintenance:

_Thought_

"Normal speaking"

"_Spell"_

_Nonverbal Spell_

"_Parseltounge"_

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Potter!" McGonagall called through the hall as she spotted the fifth year leaving from dinner.

"Professor?" He walked up to her, grinning. Her bad mood intensified as she made an educated guess as to what had him smiling.

"Your detention for tonight still stands, Potter" she said briskly, ignoring the way his face fell. "7:30 with me."

"But Professor! It's Quidditch tryouts, and besides, Snape-" She cut him off before he dug himself a deeper hole.

"_Professor_ Snape. And I now see exactly what he meant. There's no excuse for that lack of respect at your age" She looked down her nose at him and lowered her voice. "Especially given what you know of his activities on _your _behalf."

She missed the mumbled retort that he offered and she decided that she didn't want to know. Settling for a final comment she said, "Mr. Potter, as I would hope you are thoroughly aware by now, there is a war starting. I cannot speak for Professor Snape but you are entirely in control of your own actions. Do your House and your parents proud and cease this behavior."

She walked away somewhat disappointed in both herself and the boy, but Potter was getting too old to get away with that kind of behavior. She had been itching to say something to her House since Dumbledore had announced that Severus would be out for a week. Their reactions had thoroughly disgusted her, but Albus had approached her at dinner and instructed her to remain silent.

"_It would not do for the Head of Gryffindor to be so sympathetic to the Head of Slytherin. As much as I wish the case was different, House loyalties matter immensely, and with a war looming and sides being chosen it would not do to change anything quite yet my dear" Dumbledore had explained in his usual tone._

Minerva had been too shocked to even reply with the thoughts running rampant in her head, _wouldn't now be the most opportune moment to foster unity? To show those students who need a way out that we will support them too? But no, it was this way before the First War as well. James and Sirius were given far too long of a leash and the Slytherins were reined in tighter than ever. Is it any wonder they left as soon as they could? Albus means well but at times he can be short-sighted and as blind to prejudices as the rest of us._

So she bit her tongue and resigned herself to a detention with Harry. His work in her class was never the best and she had hoped to see the brilliance that James had displayed in him for her subject. Hopefully tonight's practice in detention would allow him the one-on-one chance that he needed to really get a passion for Transfiguration.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Snape bit his tongue to keep from yelling his frustrations. Poppy had been checking on him rather frequently to ensure that he remained in her care and didn't sneak off again. To be fair he planned to leave as soon as he was sure that the Matron was asleep for the evening, but could she really expect anything different?

He needed to work on the potion immediately. His brainstorming session had actually been more beneficial than brewing immediately as he had wanted to and he spared a thought to thank Winky for insisting that he not leave, but he was ready now and it had to be attended to.

It would be a relatively simple matter to mask the Draught of Living Death behind the Cruciatus potion and delay the draught's effects for a small amount of time. Crystals were often used to temper a volatile potion by adding a more moderate version of the same potion. The crystal was filled with the other potion and dissolved little by little, allowing for a controlled mixing of the two. Charms on the crystal assured the user that it would dissolve neither too fast, nor too slow, and there was plenty of room within them despite their small size to store an adequate amount of the potion.

The asphodel and sopophorous beans would be the key. The Cruciatus potion was violent enough that it was immediately absorbed into the victim's body, allowing for the almost instantaneous reaction but also ensuring that the time the victim spent in the throes of the potion was minimized. Although nine and a half minutes was a rather extreme minimum, he hoped that the crystal would dissolve sooner than that and trigger the transition into the Draught of Living Death.

His fingers twitched with anticipation of a new project but he forced himself to wait until he was absolutely sure that the Wing outside the portrait was silent before pulling himself off of the bed and shuffling quietly to the entrance.

He snuck out almost silently, but knowing that if Poppy had thought he wasn't healed enough to leave she would have stopped him in some manner. It was late enough that the halls were completely deserted, and he did not even meet any Prefects along the way, which suited him perfectly.

Not wanting to risk his so-far cooperative body, he resigned himself to waiting until the morning to brew. It had been so long since he had allowed the luxury of a full nights rest and this way he could brew uninterrupted for the entire day.

He penned a note to Albus, outlining his 'compromise' for the situation that had been forced on him and threw it through the Floo so that the Headmaster would receive it first thing in the morning. His last task accomplished, he dragged himself to bed and was asleep almost instantly.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Dumbledore was up late, as it so happened, and received Snape's note immediately. He read it through twice, and then gave a quiet laugh. _Only Severus._ He did admit that two students would definitely lower suspicion and would allow twice the amount of work to get done, but he was not blind as to Snape's real ambitions.

_We shall see what Miss Granger is truly made of. She will need all of her Gryffindor bravery and quite a bit of her own logic and patience to come through this trial. _

He had been bothered greatly by the fire that Minerva had displayed at dinner over her House's earlier reaction. He knew his answer was not what she wanted to hear from him, but punishing her entire House for the actions of a few would send the wrong message and of all the Houses, Gryffindor needed to remain strong.

He knew it was wrong to have favorites and that his position allowed him to abuse the power he wielded. But at the same time, these prejudices that they faced were based on fact. Whether or not the facts were a result of previous unfair actions is debatable. As he saw it now, in the ugly plain truth that he forced himself to see in, it was far better to have three united Houses and a Gryffindor House that believed strongly in the light than to dissolve that union in an attempt to appease the Slytherins.

It was not fair, _nothing is ever fair_ he thought with a sigh. Many of the children in Slytherin had been raised from birth to believe in blood supremacy, recently the number had dwindled, but with Slytherin House still being dominated by purebloods and notable half-bloods, those doctrines found a way into a majority of their ears.

Much as he wanted to he just couldn't extend those children who had the will to reject those teachings a helping hand. The time for choosing sides had passed with the mass breakouts from Azkaban the previous summer.

He knew it was beyond cruel to force them to live with a choice that no one their age should have to make, but his time and resources were limited so that not even the Order members and their families had the protection they deserved. Even if a student were to approach him seeking sanctuary, aside from a room in Hogwarts he had nothing to offer, and he certainly couldn't let them remain in Hogwarts unattended.

He allowed himself to foolishly hope, then, that in his absence their parents would step in and shield their children for as long as they could.

For this was war, and he could not be the wise and benevolent leader that people saw him as. War was hell and decisions needed to be made. Triage needed to be implemented. He regretted that he had to live this reality for the third time in his life.

He followed Severus' example and wrote out his notes before finally turning in for the night. An owl would deliver his message to Harry in the morning, and his acceptance of Snape's compromise would find its way to the Potions Master through the Floo in the morning.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sunday morning dawned and found Severus feeling more refreshed than he had ever felt in recent memory. He sent another note for the Headmaster through the Floo, and Albus obligingly came through to retrieve Lupin's Wolfsbane potions. It was a week before the full moon and the first dose needed to be administered. Since he would be brewing for the foreseeable future, Albus took the potions with the promise that he would ensure that Lupin took his potion daily.

Snape knew at this point that his absence from classes had been noted, and with the Headmaster's announcement he fully expected word to get back to the Death Eaters and Voldemort that he had been incapacitated.

Therefore, he readied himself and his rooms for the inevitable visit from Lucius. Sensitive materials and notes were securely stored, as were potions and any evidence of his recent misadventures. His lab was off-limits and once he mentioned a project for the Dark Lord, even Lucius wouldn't try to strong-arm him into letting him inside.

It probably wouldn't be today, or even tomorrow, because despite having orders, Lucius liked to work at his own pace. So for today, Snape stretched out his notes from yesterday, set up the cauldrons, and pulled his collection of crystals from his private stock.

The Draught of Living Death had to be made first, and he dedicated the entire day and most of the night to creating nine separate brews. Each new potion was started at an equal interval so that no two potions were at the same stage. He wasn't sure yet how much sopophorous bean was necessary to still induce the sleep and death-like state, but the amount had to be minute enough to have a delayed reaction. He decided on three base brews, one using ¼ the usual amount, one using ½, and the last using ¾.

Since asphodel was a main ingredient in both potions, and he needed something to draw out the Draught of Living Death from the crystal, he decided to try to take the sum of the amount of asphodel from both potions and divide it unevenly between the two, with the Draught getting more asphodel. He hoped that by creating this imbalance, the Draught, which was high in asphodel, would be released at a slightly faster rate in order to make up for the asphodel that was lacking in the Cruciatus potion. For each of the three base potions he made three variations, one with 60% of the asphodel, one with 70%, and one with 80%. He felt that 90% was too high, and at 50% there would be no net movement.

He bottled the nine potions, taking care to label and store them appropriately, since he couldn't ensure that they were properly charmed. He added a crystal to each potion, knowing that it took time for the crystal to fully absorb the potion into itself.

Before he retired for the night he noticed Albus's note that had come through the Floo. Knowing the Headmaster, it had probably been sent sometime this morning, so he knew an answer wasn't required at this point. He read through it once and then tossed it into the fire that Winky had insisted on maintaining at all times because of his inability to use magic to warm himself.

He allowed himself a self-satisfied smirk that his plan had been accepted so easily, and made a mental note to contact Blaise and Miss Granger the Monday after he went back to teaching.

The next day passed in a similar fashion, except that today he was experimenting with the Cruciatus potion. He left himself a larger amount of time in making this potion because he wasn't sure how the potion would react to a smaller amount of asphodel. None of the equations that he ran suggested that the potion would have a volatile reaction. If anything the overall effect of the potion would be diluted, but since the asphodel would get there eventually he wasn't worried.

Once the first potion turned out relatively stable he set up the other cauldrons to finish the complementary potions for each of the corresponding potions that he had made yesterday. Each Cruciatus potion had to be matched to a unique crystal filled with the Draught in order to measure the overall effectiveness. He had enough time left in the day to draw up enough batches of the antidote to the Draught of Living Death, and bottled and labeled them as well.

Unfortunately, neither he nor Black had the time to go through the usual animal testing. He knew the potions were safe and stable, so although it was more than a little unethical, he would have no scruples in going straight to human testing.

In this case, though, the final result was a death-like state, which meant that Snape couldn't test it on himself. Aside from the fact that he couldn't use potions even if he was able to test it on himself due to his self-poisoning. Which left only one option as the proper way to determine which potion would work best on Black when the time came.

_Bugger it. If I'm going to do this, I might as well go all the way._

He used the Floo to send a message to Albus, requesting his presence in his rooms in thirty minutes and received an affirmative reply. He left a note on his desk, knowing that the Headmaster would find it, and carefully stored all the necessary potions, and a few extra that he thought might be needed, in his travelling case, and then made his way to the door, securing his watch to his wrist. Steeling himself, he Disillusioned first his bag, then himself, biting back a cry at the pain, which, he was pleased to note, was far less than what it had been originally.

He climbed the stairs and navigated the hallways with relative ease, although he was slightly out of breath by the time he reached the Headmaster's office. Smiling to himself, he noted the time on his watch, and stood for less than a minute before he deemed it an appropriate time and gave the gargoyle the password. Finding his office empty, he grabbed one of the vials from behind Albus' desk and then proceeded to unveil the Floo to Headquarters and travel through.

By now he had begun to feel more than a little pain as the magic worked its way through the poison. He was grateful that no one had come to see who came through the Floo. He made his way quietly through the house until he came to Black's room.

As he had hoped, Lupin had moved Black's wand to his room once it was clear that the other man wouldn't be returning for it. He swiftly pocketed it, and then returned downstairs.

He grimaced as he undid both spells, allowing himself and his bag to appear normal once more. Pulling out a rather large vial he called out, "Lupin?" He heard heavy footsteps from above and then the man himself came down the stairs.

"Severus" he said quietly. "I trust if something had happened you would appear more worried?"

Snape snorted, "Of course you imbecile. I have business elsewhere and decided to deliver your potion as well."

Lupin's eyes softened briefly and his body tensed at the reminder as he reached out for the potion, "Yes. Thank you Severus." He drained the vial in one fluid motion, choking at the taste as always and giving a grim smile. "I can't tell you how much I appreciate this. I will stop by the Headmaster's office the rest of the week for the remainder of the potion."

Snape just waved his hand at the thanks, "I've also come to inform you that you and the mutt can trade letters through my house-elf, Oreo, who maintains the rooms where Black finds himself my guest."

Lupin looked more relieved than he had before and nodded his thanks. Snape continued, "You may summon Oreo to deliver yours and Potter's letters to Black and Oreo will give his letters to you. I must insist that you tell Potter to burn Black's letters after reading them, and that you follow the same advice. I cannot risk these letters being left anywhere, no matter how much Potter trusts his peers."

Once again, Lupin nodded his thanks, "I'm sure that secrecy is something that Harry can appreciate, but I will reiterate its importance, of course."

That taken care of, Snape pulled out his Portkey and whispered the password, disappearing in a swirling haze. He didn't have the strength for his usual grace when he landed, and found himself flat on his back and slightly winded, looking up at Black.

"Snape?" he asked cautiously. "You alright?"

Snape managed a nod and collected his bag, breathing deeply to fill his lungs. His voice was raspy at first, but regained its usual tenor as he spoke, "Well, Black. I am here for several reasons. First is to ensure that you are prepared in case I should be discovered," Sirius opened his mouth to say something but Snape effectively silenced him when he pulled out the other man's wand.

"I will leave this in your possession, but it will remain in the warded cabinet that we'll work on today unless it's an emergency." Black nodded his agreement, thrilled at having his wand back.

"For now, you will cast the wards around the cabinet- you know what to put on it, and make sure you tie it to a password because you won't have your wand to navigate through them otherwise."

This at least shocked the words out of Sirius, "You're trusting _me_ to ward the cabinet?"

"Don't be a fool," Snape gave a grim smile. "At present I am…unable to perform the necessary spells to safeguard it from a first year. I trust that your abilities from the First War haven't rusted enough that you can adequately cast the wards until I am recovered and can cast the spells myself."

Sirus snorted, _if there was a compliment in there then I'm a woman._ "Thanks Snape, that means a lot." He gave the other man an awkward pat on the shoulder, only to recoil in horror as Snape hissed in pain and curled into himself.

He watched Snape carefully, piecing what he's learned about Snape and his role as a spy together and came to a conclusion,"He's not happy about something, is He?"

"Your powers of observation are astounding, Black. And here I thought it took a true genius to state the obvious" Snape gnashed his teeth, finally getting a grip on the pain and straightened.

"That's the other reason why I'm here" Snape walked carefully over to his bag and opened it to reveal a myriad of potions. He opens a row of them one at a time and removes a single crystal from each before depositing it in another potion. He does this several times, and Sirius is content to watch, knowing that there's a point to this and that Snape will make it eventually.

"I'm running out of time to get you out of here alive," Snape stated, and Sirus winced with the bluntness. "The Dark Lord has not been pleased with me of late-"

This time is was Sirius who snorted, _really, the man has a flair for understatements. _

"-and is, I'm sure, convincing himself that you're better off dead if he can't get your secrets. Giving up any of those secrets is out of the question. Which only leaves the option of your death-"

Sirius feels his face fall and he involuntarily takes a step back, his inner voice screaming that Snape was always a traitor.

"-luckily for you, the Dark Lord has left it to me to determine the means of your death. If I don't present a suitable option, he will, of course, torture and kill you himself."

Snape seems pleased with himself and Black's inner voice is now telling him that Snape's not a traitor, he's insane.

"And this helps me, how?" Sirius asked, beyond confused.

Snape holds up one of the potions. "Because I just happened to create a potion that mimics the Cruciatus Curse. Unfortunately for you, it will prove to be stronger than I anticipated and will end up killing you."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

It was nearing midnight on Tuesday and Snape pinched the bridge of his nose in exasperation. _Only Lucius would be over an hour late for a meeting that he set up._

A House-Elf had appeared around roughly ten o'clock that evening and informed Snape in no uncertain terms that his Master would come through the Floo around 11 for a meeting.

He let out a breath in a sigh, the tests had gone better than he had expected, and the proper combination was safely bottled and labeled in his lab. The tests had taken all night and continued throughout the better part of this morning, and once that was complete Snape barely had the patience to double check that the cabinet was warded and all trace of his experiments were gone from the room.

He came back to his lab and set to brewing immediately, and only allowed himself to fall asleep on his sitting room couch once his lab was once again in immaculate order.

The unexpected visit from Lucius was a bother, but one that he would rather get over with sooner rather than later.

Finally the blond man appeared through the Floo and Snape rose to greet him.

"Lucius," he drawled. "How have you been?"

"Much better than you, from what I've heard," he said it pompously, but Snape could detect the hint of worry in his once friend's eyes as he looked the Potions Master over. Seeing nothing to cause immediate concern, he continued, "Hopefully the news I bring from the Dark Lord will speed your recovery."

There was an underlying tone to Lucius' voice that he had heard before but was never able to fully place.

"The Dark Lord wanted me to bring news of an upcoming raid. It's being led by Rodolphus and Rabastan, only a small group really. There's a small Muggle town near the ruins of Godric's Hollow and recent activity in the area has suggested that there might be Order members there" Lucius explained.

_It's a test_ Snape realized instantly, feeling ill. _Lucius will report back as to whether or not I reveal when the Order members will be there, they must already know the schedule of rotations, and which nights there are two members there versus just the regular one. And if I warn them that the attack is coming he'll know that it was me. _

He had more than a small inclination to be violently ill, but plastered a fake smile on his face and forced the words out of his mouth, "Certain restrictions keep me from telling you what you need, but if the raid were to happen tomorrow night it would certainly be advantageous."

_Sturgis, Hestia, forgive me._

Lucius patted his shoulder in the same way that Black had done yesterday and Snape flinched, wincing at the contact. Unlike Black, howver, Lucius tightened his hold on Snape's shoulder rather then relinquish it.

"I thank you, Severus. I will certainly inform Rodolphus and Rabastan of this development. Do keep your ears open, for any whispers that might prove useful," Lucius offered a small smile and then retreated through the Floo.

Suddenly the progress he had made earlier seemed woefully insignificant, and sleep evaded him for the remainder of the night and he agonized over the fates of his colleagues.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Well that was actually not at all where I had planned this chapter going but once I start writing I have to go where it takes me. I am rather pleased with it though and I'm hoping that the update was so unexpected after my previous notice that no one will object to the new direction (but seriously- I still want constructive criticism if you have any).

Ok, for real this time, don't expect an update until around the end of May/beginning of June.

Always

Sinkme


	15. Chapter 15

Ch. 15

Hey all. I really appreciate all the reviews, alerts, etc. I can't believe how many hits this has gotten!

Maintenance:

_Thought_

"Normal speaking"

"_Spell"_

_Nonverbal Spell_

"_Parseltounge"_

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Light was attempting to push through the early morning clouds when Hestia Jones apparated to the meeting point at Godric's Hollow. Twice every week it was her duty to patrol the area around the neighborhood and the surrounding Muggle developments. Tonight she was glad for the company, as there seemed to be a fog rolling in.

It had rained last night and the contrast to the unusual heat in the area could easily account for the condensation, but its presence made her uneasy for some reason. Hearing something behind her, she whirled around only to see Sturgis standing off to the side with his usual half smile.

Although most people found him to be unpleasant company because he tended towards the quieter side, Hestia enjoyed the quiet and didn't mind not being forced to make small talk. Besides, talking in a place like this would only attract attention, which they wanted to avoid at all costs. If the Death Eaters found out that they were patrolling certain areas it would rain down an attack on them and as it was usually only one person, sometimes two, per rotation, they would be awfully outmatched.

Hestia tried not to dwell on her experiences from the First War, but she often found her thoughts returning to those memories whenever she found herself on the rotation. In a way it comforted her because although her mind was occupied, she tricked herself into falling into the high-alert mind set she often found herself in during those hellish years.

It was that mentality which allowed her to hear the not so far away sound of several 'pops.' Her head jerked to the noise and her heart froze as she signaled to Sturgis. Her first, hopeful, thoughts were that something had happened and it was just Order members coming to fetch them.

She didn't allow herself to hold to this delusion for long. Even in an emergency they would have sent a Patronus first, and at the very least would have sent it now to identify themselves. Her heart unfroze and leapt into her throat as she heard a laugh, more like an insane cackle that had troubled her worst nightmares.

She had been with Marlene McKinnon and a small party that had futilely attempted to capture Bellatrix Lestrange after they received a tip that she would be traveling alone to a meeting point. She had already earned an impressive- but gruesome- reputation, and the group of five was none too eager to be separated in the attempt to surround her.

By the time they managed to get a somewhat favorable position they were down to three, Kingsley was down with a hideous injury and Benjy; Hestia tried to keep her eyes from darting to where Benjy laid spread eagle on the ground, and instead tried to focus on making sure that no one else joined him by moving in too quickly.

Her focus slipped, though, when Bellatrix laughed. It was unnerving at the very least, especially after the displays of Dark magic that she had just demonstrated. It was easy to see why Bellatrix was so feared.

Then she spoke. "McKinnon, isn't it?" she asked, eyes fixed on Marlene. Her voice was smooth and confident, even with four Order members bearing down on her. Marlene twitched but answered back strongly, "You bet! Recognize me by my dad, huh?" Marlene gave her own smirk of confidence.

Her father was a well-known Auror who had injured Rodolphus in a large battle last week. He wasn't captured but it would hopefully impair him long enough to get another attempt in. Bellatrix gave a manic laugh.

"No, not from him. I see more of his features in your brother." That stopped Marlene cold. Her brother was a sixth year at Hogwarts, home for the summer break. "Of course, it was hard to see his features beneath the blood, and he just wouldn't stay still for very long. Probably because of the Cruciatus curses I kept throwing at him."

Her smirk turned predatory, "But that was after I killed your mother." Hestia took a few steps closer to her friend, "Marlene, it's not true, stay focused, it'll be ok." Now Bellatrix turned her gaze on Hestia. "Pathetic Mudblood" she spat.

She turned to Marlene again, "They're all dead. Surely you didn't think I'd let your pathetic father get away with hurting Roddy, did you? He didn't put up half as good of a fight as I had hoped, and he twitched most deli-" she was cut off with a yell from Marlene and a hissed curse.

Hestia watched with narrowed eyes as the red curse soared towards Bellatrix and she shot her own curse lower, to try and cut off her attempt at dodging it. Caradoc snapped out of his shock and was forming the words for his own curse when Bellatrix retaliated. Hestia watched in terrified awe as she ducked under Marlene's curse and wordlessly brought up a shield to block hers own before sending her own curse at Caradoc.

The sickly green light hit him full in the chest before he could finish his spell and he fell to the ground. Looking over to see Marlene still sending curses in a frenzy, and Kingsley slowly recovering, she yelled to both of them to retreat. Kingsley nodded slowly and gripped Benjy's cold arm as he activated his portkey and was whisked away.

Hestia yelled to Marlene again, seeing that her friend wasn't responding and was still fighting. She made her way over to Caradoc, shooting spells towards Bellatrix and still yelling to Marlene. Finally, as she knelt to grasp Caradoc's arm, she saw Marlene take a step back and nod towards her, starting to pull out her portkey.

But Bellatrix was too fast for her, and a Stunner caught Marlene in the stomach. Not wanting to lose her prey she closed the distance between them and avoided the spell Hestia managed to get off before apparating away with Marlene.

Hestia sat frozen with shock for several minutes, not processing that her friend had just been taken and it was _her fault_, that the McKinnons were dead, that Benjy and Caradoc were dead, that she didn't feel her own injuries stinging and aching, and it wasn't until a Patronus loped up to her with James Potter's frantic voice asking if she was too injured to come back that she regained some semblance of control.

Staring at the silvery stag she mentally shook herself off, although it did nothing for the tears on her face, and activated the portkey, knowing that she wouldn't be able to muster up a good memory for a Patronus to send back to them.

Three days later, only two days after they buried Benjy and Caradoc, Marlene's beaten and bloodied body was left for them to find.

She shook off the memory and her old ghosts, looking once more for Sturgis and seeing that he had taken up a defensive position behind some of the ruins of the Potter's old house. She, too, carefully hid herself behind one of the old houses, waiting for the intruders to make themselves known.

It was hard just sitting there waiting for the attack to come, for Hestia was sure now that it was to be an attack. There could be no other explanation and the pops that she heard were most definitely the sounds of apparating.

Glancing at Sturgis again she could see that he too was on edge, wand at the ready and eyes hard and searching through the fog for shapes. She looked as well and could see a form taking shape and let out a hiss when Bellatrix Lestrange emerged from the fog like a specter.

Knowing that there had been multiple pops, she turned around only to see two more shapes emerging from behind them. She had no doubt that there were at least two others closing in from each side to trap them. Death Eaters liked security in numbers and typically had the ability to outman their opponents.

Her mind was whirling, trying to figure out how they knew that there was a patrol. Their exact location and the way they were bearing down on them suggested prior knowledge of their rotations as tonight was the only time this week that there were two members, and it shifted each week as did the people chosen...so unless they were exceedingly lucky, someone had tipped them off within the last couple of days. Damn.

She saw Sturgis signaling her out of the corner of her eye and nodded as she read his intentions in his eyes. _Attack now and retreat as soon as possible. Try to catch them off guard. _

Keeping her back to the wall she turned to face the two shapes that had stopped just at the edge of the fog behind their position. A spell from Sturgis towards Bellatrix ended the standoff and Hestia quickly cast her Stunners as well.

The shapes dodged, unable to call a shield up soon enough, and returned with their own spells. Being a Ravenclaw she could admit to a rather extensive knowledge of spells and shields but she had shied away from curses and hexes, especially Dark Magic, and the experience and basic training from the First War was all she could boast, about.

It was no little experience, and it was because of that that she was able to recognize one of the two curses coming at her. Knowing that when it came to unknown curses and Dark Magic that it was better to dodge than to attempt a shield she rolled to her left, avoiding the yellow light aimed at her chest and the second curse that she didn't recognize that was aimed at where her legs had been moments ago.

She fired off two spells in quick releases as she stood, both aimed towards one of the Death Eaters. He summoned a shield to guard against the spells, thinking both were Stunners again. She smirked when the shield absorbed the first spell and watched the second one cut through it to land on his chest. He crumbled soundlessly to the ground, the air in his lungs being ruthlessly suppressed until he lay still.

It was a trick that Moody had taught her, useful and unpredictable, but she had only utilized it after Marlene had been buried and her guilt overrode her moral qualms about killing. Moody supported her decision; _it's war Jones, not a picnic. They make it easy too- those masks stay on and you can pretend they're not even human._

The other Death Eater, seemingly shocked by his companion's fate, recovered quickly and hurled a curse, a dreadful purple one that she had seen one too many times. _Dolohov_.

Caught up in her momentary victory, she could only summon a nearby piece of rubble and let it catch the spell, exploding upon impact and blinding her with small rocks and dust.

_That was careless. _Turning to face where he had been her eyes narrowed when she found the space empty. She kept her back securely to the wall, knowing that being overtaken from behind was worse then backing herself into a corner when it came to fighting one on one. Another lesson from Moody.

She didn't count on her security wall being destroyed. She didn't realize what was happening until the spells impacted the wall and she was caught in the explosion. Ears ringing and disoriented, her eyes fell on a body laying half a dozen feet from her.

The shape was familiar but her mind was slow to see the connection. Eventually it came into focus and she recognized the face. _Sturgis. No! _There was no doubt in her mind that he was dead. His chest was impacted horribly, looking like a boulder had crushed him, and he was covered in blood.

He didn't twitch as Hestia shook him gently. "Accio portkey" a hard voice called away her only hope of escape in her moment of weakness and she felt something hit her in the small of her back as the words reached her ears, "Avada Kedavra."

Bellatrix smiled in triumph as her spell hit its mark and Dolohov destroyed the portkey, knowing that without the password it was useless for they wouldn't be careless enough to allow the spells to be traced back to wherever it lead.

He finally allowed himself to feel surprise that the witch had killed one of them, even though Yaxley wasn't as much of an accomplished dueler as he bragged to be.

Bellatrix was laughing and he growled, unable to stand her, "Finish it and let's get the hell out of here." He nodded to the others, watching as they apparated away; they couldn't access the castle as they were lower members, and Bellatrix shot the Dark Mark into the sky as the last pop echoed across the grounds.

He knelt next to Yaxley, grasping his arm firmly and waited until Bellatrix activated her own portkey and was gone before activating his. Belllatrix had a tendency of leaving nasty surprises for whoever discovered the scene first and the Dark Lord had specifically told Dolohov to make sure that nothing hindered the Order from accessing either the site or the bodies. This early in the game the goal wasn't casualties, it was inspiring unrest and panic.

The deaths of two of their own on a rotation that was supposed to be secret and well hidden from other members would create suspicion of a spy among their ranks. Of course, he smirked, Snape would probably be the first blamed. Ironic that this actually was his fault.

But he could appreciate the difficulty of the balancing act that Snape had to live with. It was probably made easier by the fact that the fools _wanted_ to believe that no one would betray them and even though they would suspect Snape, they would never do anything about it as far as removing him from their presence or even from their lives.

He cut his musings short and removed his mask, leaving Yaxley at the side of the entrance hall, motioning for one of the members of the outer rings to take the body. He continued deeper into the castle, his steps slow and confident, knowing that even as ambitious as Bellatrix was she wouldn't dare cross him and report to the Dark Lord alone on this.

Sure enough, she was waiting in the antechamber and they entered the room together, kneeling as one before the Dark Lord's throne, not picking up their heads until they heard his voice. "It's done then?" "Yes, My Lord," they replied.

"Well done," with a nod of his head he dismissed them, and Dolohov and Bellatrix parted ways at the first hallway, each going their separate ways without even a second thought to the events of the last two hours.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Thursday dawned gray and dark for Snape, who hadn't been able to sleep after Lucius's visit the previous night. He spent hours convincing himself that he had no choice in how to act.

They would attack tonight, probably a small force of five or six, and expect to find two Order members patrolling the area around Godric's Hollow. There was no way to forewarn them without compromising his position, and he couldn't alert the Order because they would want to launch a counterattack and capture the Death Eaters.

If that happened he could consider his life forfeit.

He paused and carried that thought further; ignoring the beginnings of panic that he felt whenever he considered what would happen should he be discovered. _It might be worth it to tell them. If he sends two or even three of the Inner members and two or three others, that's nothing to scoff at._

_I could get Black out while a much larger force of Order members captures the Death Eaters and it would be a decisive victory in the war's infancy. _

He was slightly alarmed to find himself seriously considering this option. _I can't anticipate how far reaching this decision is. If I do this and the attack group is captured and then Black disappears from my rooms there will be no doubt that I was a spy and it was my doing. _

_There would be no room for failure on either end of the operation, all of the Death Eaters, especially whoever is leading the mission would need to be captured. Black would be out and I could focus on aiding the Order from wherever I am placed for my "protection." _

_It is tempting despite the fact that the Dark Lord will actively seek my death. _He titled his head to the side, sitting down in an armchair and turning the idea over in his head.

_If I remain silent there will only be one outcome. Hestia and Sturgis will be killed. They are skilled but against five or six Death Eaters there will be no chance. They will leave the bodies visible and the Dark Mark in the sky. That is how the Dark Lord operates. _

_They probably won't even set up any traps or leave a curse behind with the bodies to be triggered. With their deaths the Order will begin to panic. The rotation schedule is only known in its entirety to Albus, Minerva, and myself. Everyone else only knows when it is their week, and if they will be in a pair or alone. _

_Whether or not everyone is aware that Minerva and I know the full rotation list, they will become suspicious of me and believe it was my fault, I will plead ignorance of the attack and claim that someone must have said something about the rotation around Godric's Hollow or one of them was seen. Since it is only Godric's Hollow, the Dark Lord might suspect that there are other locations similarly under watch but at this point I am certain he doesn't know where._

_Godric's Hollow was more of a symbolic gesture than a functional protection. The site had no real importance except for an emotional attachment as the place of the Dark Lord's downfall. Despite his fondness for Lily he had protested against posting a guard rotation at Godric's Hollow. _

_They were spread thin as it was and to waste people guarding an abandoned neighborhood and some Muggles was incredibly foolish. Dumbledore overruled him, though, and allowed them their sentimentality. _

He briefly entertained the possibility of warning Albus at least and letting him decide but he squashed that idea because he wasn't sure he could anticipate how the Headmaster would react. Whether he would want to use the attack as a trap for the Death Eaters and hope that Snape pulled himself out of the hole he dug, or whether he would do nothing, and allow the attack to happen.

He honestly wasn't sure which reaction would scare him more from the Headmaster, but in either case he couldn't report this to Dumbledore. _As tempting as it would be to tell the Order and muster up a plan of action there is no guarantee that it would work and I won't compromise my position this early for anything less than a certainty at victory. _

Temporarily satisfied with his decision he banished all thoughts from his head even as his traitorous mind called out to him, _Coward. You'll just sit here and let them die when you can do something about it. Coward. Sit there and stay on the fence. You'll falter eventually and there's no guarantee this chance will come again. Do something. _

Snarling as his mind was back to wrestling with itself he withdrew into his Occlumency shields, ruthlessly suppressing the thoughts that hounded at his walls and inspected them for cracks or weaknesses left over from his last meetings with the Dark Lord.

He noticed with interest that a corner of his secondary wall, the one dedicated to memories of his childhood and the anger and hate that accompanied most of the memories, was not as shadowed as it once was. Intrigued, he narrowed his focus and examined the wall, trying to find what caused the lighter shading of the area.

It was imperative that this wall remain strong and fully inundated with all the emotions that the Dark Lord expected him to show and that were easily accessible to Snape himself when he depended on those memories and emotions to fuel his mask.

Looking over the stream of memories with a practiced eye, he could tell the difference immediately. _The truce with Black. _It must have caused the deeper feelings of hate and anger to dissipate from the associated memories.

His grudge against Potter had similarly worn down but that was more due to the passage of time- it was hard to hate a man fifteen years after his death with the same vehemence as he once did.

Although Black and Potter were by no means his sole antagonists, they had definitely inspired most of his hate. He continued to inspect the memories, knowing that another source of fuel would be needed to imbue the emotions in the memories once again.

So he took his anger at his inability to do anything for Hestia, Sturgis, and Black, his frustration at his helplessness, his overwhelming hate for the Dark Lord and the war that was ripping his life apart, and bled them off into the memories, restoring the shadows that accompanied the malicious thoughts hiding in the second wall.

When he felt he could breathe again he retreated back from the wall and reexamined everything meticulously, knowing that his week reprieve was a blessing in disguise and might be the last chance he had for a long time to refocus and refuel. Working on his shields also had the added benefit of narrowing his focus.

He had taken the edge off of the feelings of unease plaguing him about the impending attack, but unless he remained busy he would return to those thoughts. Occlumency and potions were the only things that he knew would capture his attention fully and he planned on utilizing both until the day was over.

So he took the time while he had it to go over every inch of his mental defenses and reinforce his shields, drawing a small amount of power from the Order's barriers that were always present in his innermost protections.

It was a tricky line to walk but he was the one who insisted that he be included in the shield. It had been an idea of Albus's left over from the First War. Upon capture there was no individual in the Order, aside from Albus and perhaps Snape, who would be able to withstand the intensity of the Dark Lord's Legilimency.

Snape was convinced even now that he would not last longer than a day under his full intensity and powers. It took most of his discipline and strength to defend against the probes that the Dark Lord sent his way.

It had been Albus's idea that the pooled magic of several individuals skilled in the same branch of magic could overcome any opposition from one individual. There was no chance to develop this idea during the First War and at that time Albus hadn't thought of applying his idea to Occlumency shields, but rather to a spell that would lend a temporary increase in power.

It was several years later that Albus revisited his old idea and considered applying the theory to the power of Occlumency. The Headmaster approached Snape several years ago and proposed the potential of linked Occlumency shields.

Snape was skeptical at first, unsure of _how_ such a spell would be invented, but did concede that should a spell be found or created that could link two minds somehow, that the theory behind sharing the pooled Occlumency talent could be possible.

Never did he imagine that Dumbledore would create such a spell, modified from one that Healers used on brain damaged patients, just a short year later. The application of the spell was rather tricky, and a specific ritual was established to selectively anchor the spell to the section of the brain that was triggered with mental attacks and the defense of the mind. Theoretically the spell could lend itself to resisting the Imperius Curse, but they were hesitant to test that idea.

Pulling a collective defense from the minds of everyone linked, the barrier was impenetrable and it was impossible to discern the identities of the members because of the sheer amount of emotions, memories, and walls present in the defense.

Snape had been astounded when Albus offered him the spell to test. It had taken them a year to be absolutely certain as to the entire scope of the spell and how it could be best used.

It had been Snape who convinced Dumbledore that every member needed to be included in the spell. It would be ridiculously time consuming and would drain both of them tremendously, but the benefits far outweighed the cost, and Dumbledore agreed.

The Inner members, those who knew the most about the Order and were the most at-risk, were taken under the spell's protection first. It took a while and a demonstration to convince them of its worth, and that was when they discovered a drawback of the spell.

When Snape had been testing it his Occlumency was beyond what the added protection had offered and he had unknowingly used his shields before the combined protection.

It had escaped their notice because they weren't fully aware of everything that the spell would encompass or to what degree it pulled on the combined shields. Dumbledore, after several debates with Snape, remained outside of the scope of the spell.

It was highly unlikely that he would ever have need of it and if something should happen or be discovered about the spell, some kind of complication, Dumbledore at least would remain unaffected and could attempt to discover a solution.

After securing Minerva, Molly and Arthur Weasley, and Lupin in the spell, Dumbledore attempted to pull secrets via Legilimency out of Molly Weasley, who had no Occlumency shields or skill of her own. Immediately upon entering her mind and actively searching for secrets that the Order protected he was met with the shield and was repelled, he would have remained in her mind to continue to examine the shield but in the back of his head he could hear sounds of distress and withdrew gently from her mind only to see Snape and Minerva clutching their heads and panting as though in pain.

Arthur was paler than usual and Lupin looked rather faint. He looked to Lupin for an explanation but he could only shake his head helplessly, "We all felt _something_ as soon as you initiated the mental contact with Molly."

Arthur could add nothing else and checked on his wife, who was fine. Snape recovered first, "I could feel the pull." He tried to explain it, stumbling through words in an effort to pick the right ones, "I could feel your attack. As though it were in my own mind, but there was a distinction because I knew it wasn't." he turned to Molly, "Did you feel any pain? Discomfort?"

She replied, "No pain, I could feel something but it didn't hurt. More like a pressure." Lupin and Arthur nodded, "That's very similar to what I felt. But I noticed also a drain in my energies."

Snape was checking on Minerva and offered a pain-relieving potion to help against the headache. He could get a handle on it until he returned to Hogwarts and get his own potion.

She took the vial gratefully, "What happened? Did it work?" They both turned to Dumbledore, who nodded, "I was repelled almost instantly and could discern nothing from the shield."

He could see Snape nodding to himself, "You have an idea, Severus?" "Yes, I believe I do" he spoke slowly, making sure he worded his explanation in a way so as to make it clear.

"The shield is cumulative and draws from everyone connected to protect the person coming under attack. Minerva and I are the most accomplished in Occlumency and mental discipline out of the five of us that are under the spell currently. Molly has no skill to protect herself with, so the spell pulled from Minerva and I the strongest in order to compensate.

"Arthur and Lupin were drained less because our skills were enough for the moment. I would assume that as more people are included in the spell the strain would lessen on each of us, especially as members who have more talent with Occlumency are included.

"Or as more people learn to employ some form of Occlumency- with more people to draw from the resulting drain or in our case, Minerva, pain, should lessen tremendously."

He turned to Albus, who was looking at him thoughtfully, "We should have anticipated this." The Headmaster nodded, "We assumed after testing it and based on your experiences that the rest would follow accordingly."

Now it was Snape who nodded, his mind working in overdrive now that he was considering additional implications to the spell. Minerva was instructed as to the details of initiating the spell and the proper ritual for tying the spell down properly in the mind while Snape and Dumbledore retreated to Hogwarts to work over this new development.

"I must confess, Severus," the Headmaster began once they were seated comfortably in his office. "That I don't fully understand why you were so insistent that you be included in the mental defense spell. If Tom were to become aware of the fact that you are keeping secrets for the Order that he can't access, and are in fact contributing to the defense of them in other's minds, I fear that he won't listen to any explanation you might offer."

Snape nodded once more, "I fully examined all sides of this spell before deciding to force you to include me in this. Besides the added security of knowing that should the worst happen that the Dark Lord can't pull the information from me against my will, it also serves to assure those members of the Order who doubt my intentions, although that was not one of my primary reasons.

"My own abilities in Occlumency are useful and will helping the collective pool. I did consider the possibility you just mentioned and have been working to incorporate the shields brought with the spell into my own defenses, particularly as my last possible defense. I will just have to ensure that my own shields are strong enough and flexible enough to withstand and fool the probes that the Dark Lord is fond of using.

"As long as it remains hidden within my own shields he shouldn't discover it. When you tested it against Molly could you sense anything about the shield?"

He knew where Snape was going with this, "No, there was nothing to hint of the individuals who were part of the shield. It was too chaotic to pull anything definite out of and certainly too strong to fully grasp and examine for details."

Satisfied with its success Snape departed from the Headmaster's company and retreated to his own rooms.

Only when he was fully satisfied with every level of his mental defenses did Snape withdraw from his mind. Noticing the time he summoned Winky to have lunch brought to him, which he ate quickly, before retreating to his labs.

Poppy hadn't requested any more potions for the Hospital Wing and he didn't dare contact her to ask if she needed anything for fear of drawing her attentions back to himself so soon after escaping her care. He had several years of experience with the general scope of the Wing's needs and knowing that he had the time now to brew some of the less common potions that Poppy might have need of, he resolved to accomplish as much as he could before passing out from exhaustion and hopefully avoiding any thoughts of the attack to take place later that night.

It was busy work that he could completely lose himself in, and instead of multitasking with several potions at once he limited himself to only two at a time as long as the potions were low maintenance.

He took his time, drawing out each task as much as possible and ensuring perfection at each step. In this way much of the afternoon and early evening passed. Grimacing at the discomfort in his back and neck, he first cracked them and then gently stretched the tension out.

It was a quarter to nine and by his best guess the attack would most likely fall around dawn, when the first light made visibility a little easier in the ruined area around Godric's Hollow.

He hummed his displeasure as now he found himself reverting back to an internal debate. Mindlessly he twirled his wand, he kept it on him despite the poison, between his fingers and it was not for several minutes that he noticed that the small spark of pain that had lately occurred when he touched his wand or attempted to access his core was absent.

His mind immediately switched gears and he held his wand at the ready, while falling into his traditional dueling stance, which he had adopted from a stance in the martial arts that he studied as a boy.

His legs were shoulder length apart; slightly bent and following his body which was angled slightly back, decreasing the target that he presented. His left hand was slightly extended, palm open and close to his body, while his right arm was bent close to his chest, wand extended forward.

This allowed him two added advantages, since his body was partially concealing his wand and he had some skill in non-verbal spells it allowed for quick, unexpected attacks.

He had also found, through spell work and practice in Hogwarts, that certain spells, mostly curses and hexes, responded very well to body and wand movements while directing its power and the path it would travel.

He had first discovered this with the Disarming spell. When they were learning it, the professor used only the basic wand movements with minimal extraneous effort and no body movement. The result, as his classmate saw upon being hit, was for his wand to fly out of his hand.

In practice, though, the students were not as precise with the wand movements and many compensated for their lack of finesse by throwing their arm and even their whole body into the spell.

In the cases where they managed the correct wand movement in addition to the extra body movements, the spell was much more powerful, even going so far as to slam into the target and throw them back several feet.

After trying it for himself Snape could actually _feel _the difference in the spell and became more aware of what was required of him to have the spell meet his needs.

This observation lent itself to many more of his experiments with traditional spells and in creating his own unique spells.

He felt completely at ease in his stance and took careful notice of his wand as he gathered a small amount of magic and bid it to do his will, while pointing to a small book on table, "Accio book."

The book soared across the room and he caught it, feeling more than satisfied that the pain was gone and the poison had been overcome. He was pleased that he was no longer poisoned, but felt the strain of the day catching up to him and he knew that he needed something to keep him occupied until tomorrow morning.

He finally decided to take the easy way out and drink a vial of Dreamless Sleep to allow him both proper rest, and a welcome escape from what he knew what was to come.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

For the students the week progressed normally, with the notable exception of Potions classes. An extraordinary wizard Dumbledore might be, but a Potions Master he was not.

Knowing very well how much it annoyed everyone around her, Hermione tried to suppress her inward panic at the thought of what this week might cost them as far as knowledge and practice went for their OWL examinations.

Between the debacle of Potions without Professor Snape, they were still no closer towards even making an argument with Umbridge into letting them use magic in Defense Against the Dark Arts.

September would be drawing to a close soon and Hermione absolutely refused to go the whole year without practicing those spells. She hoped that by the end of the month Ron and Harry would be so frustrated with Umbridge that they would listen to her idea of independent practice.

Although she still had no idea where they would practice. Professor McGonagall might help to get them a room, she was sure that their Head of House hated Umbridge as much as they did. She hadn't yet approached her about the blood quill and wasn't planning on it either.

She understood now that Harry's excuse for not reporting Umbridge was rather appealing, but she tried not to dwell on it because it was her duty as a Prefect to protect the students, and not reporting the blood quill could mean that other students were submitted to it as punishment.

Hermione had kept her ears open for the last couple of days, though, and hadn't heard anything about other students using a weird quill that caused them pain, so she supposed that not everyone was subjected to the quill.

Harry was doing a little better, for which Hermione was extremely grateful. Between everything that had been going on with school, Prefect rounds, and her limited contact with both the Order and her parents, Hermione was hard pushed to not snap at her friend when he fell into one of his moods.

They were all sitting in an empty common room; taking advantage of the fact that everyone else was at dinner in order to claim the room for themselves.

Harry had hinted earlier that he had something to tell them, and she waited patiently for him to check the room for any stragglers before leaning in closer to them. "I think Snape's a traitor," he said seriously.

"What!" Hermione couldn't contain herself. "What do you mean, a traitor? To the Order?"

"Yeah," he turned to Ron. "He's a spy, isn't he?"

Ron looked incredulous. "Why are you asking me, none of us are in the Order, of the three of us you're the most likely to know what's going on."

Harry shook his head and said angrily; "Dumbledore's been avoiding me since summer and he barely told me anything important even before that. He always waited until I got myself too far into something to answer some of my questions, and he kinda skirts his way around them, too."

Hermione gave a small squeak as Harry's ramblings hit very close to what she suspected but he didn't notice, although Ron gave her a funny look.

"It only makes sense that Snape is a spy," Harry continued. "It's how he stays all chummy with his Death Eater pals. He pretends to spy for_ us_ but is really spying for _them._ And actually, Ron, of the three of us, _you're_ the most likely to know what's going on in the Order. Your parents and older brothers are in it after all."

"They don't tell me anything, though. They're all super careful when it comes to Order business." Hermione had recovered at that point, "But still, you've got to know something about it. Me and Harry don't know anything aside from a vague understanding of what it is and who is involved."

Ron continued to shake his head so Hermione tried a different approach, knowing that they needed more information. "What about wizard's chess?"

Harry and Ron both looked at her like she was crazy, "Maybe later, Hermione. And I thought you sucked at it anyway" Ron said, still rather confused.

"I do not _suck_" she huffed. "But that's not what I meant. Ron, you're a really good player- that takes strategy and understanding of the game, right?" He nodded, not really following her train of thought. "What would you do if you were Professor Du-" she gave a small cough.

"If you were the Headmaster. How would you organize it? What are your goals? What's the function of the Order of the Phoenix? Who would you include?" She could literally see a light go off in Ron's head and Harry gave her an appreciative smile.

Ron was silent for a minute and then said, "Give me a day to think about it. There are a lot of angles to look into." Harry clapped him on the shoulder, "Let's head down to dinner, it's not even half over yet and I need to find Angelina."

Dinner was the normal boisterous setting as always except that Ron wasn't inhaling food as was typical of him. Hermione was glad to see that he seemed to be deep in thought.

The sooner they figured out whatever they could about the Order and how they could possible fit into it, the better. Hermione's own suspicions about Dumbledore and his actions could never be shared with Harry, she knew.

Or at least, not until she was absolutely sure. The only way to be absolutely sure, in her mind, was to have all the facts. So while Ron was planning how to run the Order, Hermione assigned herself a new research project: Albus Dumbledore.

She was sure the library had to be full of books with him in it since aside from Harry and Voldemort he had to be one of the most important people of the last century. His work was famous and he defeated Grindelwald.

Surely somewhere in all those books would be something that would help her along. She smiled and reached for more mashed potatoes, fully planning on enjoying a meal where Ron didn't cause her to lose her appetite with his eating habits.

"Harry, why did you need to talk to Angelina? I see her down at the end of the table," Hermione pointed to the older girl. Harry's smile slipped a little before he answered, "McGonagall made me serve the detention that Snape gave me and I missed tryouts. I've kinda been avoiding her since then but I need to talk to her about it."

"Oh," she said as she remembered that last Friday had been Gryffindor's tryouts for the Quidditch team. She put her hand on his and smiled, "Hey, it's not like she'll give your spot away. Angelina might be a little peeved that you missed it but everyone knows you're the best Seeker here."

"Yeah, I know. I just love playing…" he trailed off and ended with an attempt at a smile. Hermione gave his hand a small squeeze to show that she understood what he was trying to say.

She was glad to see he wasn't as angry as he had been before and she had to take opportunity, "Can I ask you a favor?" He looked up and finally gave her a real smile, "Of course."

Hermione knew she wasn't very accomplished when it came to subtlety, but it was _Harry_, and she hoped it would work. She withdrew her hand and rubbed her fingers over the slight sliver scars on the back of it, "Can you sit by me in DADA? I just don't want to get any more detentions with _her_ and if we're next to each other then you can make sure I don't talk back to her again and get in detention."

Hermione saw that Ron had finally come out of his thinking haze and gave her a smirk and an eye roll at her attempt to manipulate Harry.

Harry was, of course, oblivious and said, "You bet, Hermione. There's no way I'm letting that toad get you in another detention," another smile. "And you can keep me in check too! So I won't miss Quidditch anymore. So I guess you'll have to watch me in Potions too." Ron just shook his head at his friend and went back to thinking. Hermione assured Harry that of course she'd keep an eye on him in Potions too.

They stood after the meal was concluded and made their way to the front of the Great Hall towards where Angelina had been sitting when Harry was stopped by a second year.

"Professor Dumbledore told me to give you this," he said without looking up. As soon as the letter was in his hand the younger student vanished in the crowd, too shy to stay any longer.

He stared at the letter and told Hermione and Ron as he opened it, "I can find Angelina in the Common Room later." He read the letter quickly and looked up, confused.

"Dumbledore wants me to go to his office tomorrow night. Wonder what he wants?"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

So that's totally not where I imagined this chapter going- you got a ton of details that I was going to save until later but I hope at least this clears some things up.

A note about the mental shields- yes it is really convenient that none of the people under its protection can have the Order's secrets pulled out of them through Legilimency, but any information that isn't secret-kept is fair game for the person to divulge, say—under torture? The shields only protect against Legilimency. There's no unbreakable vow or secret keeper forcing the Order members to stay silent no matter what. If they're captured and tortured they can divulge the information, it just can't be pulled out of their mind.

So yea…

Hope you liked it!

Always

Sinkme


	16. Chapter 16

Ch. 16

Look at me go- updating so quickly…all thanks to you guys- over 30,000 hits. I can't even believe it! Thank you!

Maintenance:

_Thought_

"Normal speaking"

"_Spell"_

_Nonverbal Spell_

"_Parseltounge"_

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Even though he was only teaching classes for two groups- the fifth and seventh years- Dumbledore found himself much busier for the week that Snape was out than he had been in some time.

He managed it, of course; and if his handwriting was slightly illegible and he had pushed back some of his own deadlines to ensure that some of this paperwork wasn't technically late, well he was sure no one would point it out to him.

It was no wonder, then, that he hadn't found the time to talk to Harry yet. At least, that's what he kept telling himself. He knew, though, that it was a mistake on his part to have put it off for so long.

How was he to tell the boy that his relatives had died almost a week and a half ago but he hadn't had the time to mention it earlier? Aside from that was the little matter of his attempt so far to distance himself from Harry.

Things had begun to change. Ever since he had handed him that diary- no it was before that. The diary had been the final proof he needed, but his decision had been made years before that. Even before Harry had came to Hogwarts. But these were thoughts that he would not indulge in. Not even in the privacy of his office.

He had made these decisions almost sixteen years ago and swore on his magic that he would see the end of the war and do what needed to be done.

He sighed, turning in his chair to look over the grounds. It was a magnificent view but he didn't allow himself to become lost in it as he had when he had first occupied the office.

He twisted back to face his desk and waved a hand over the left uppermost cabinet in his desk, whispering the password. It popped open and he removed a small black book from within.

It wasn't much to look at, old and frayed, and with a most surprising hole passing all the way through the center of the book. The pages were stained with dry ink and the area around the hole had been slightly burned.

He turned the diary over in his hands, eyes lingering on the name engraved on the top; _Tom Riddle. _It was the first bit of concrete proof that pointed towards the idea that Tom had created Horcuxes, at least two, possibly more.

He had dedicated most of his time and energy during the First War into attempting to figure out how Tom Riddle had made himself so powerful. His demonstrations of magic were incredible to behold and at the time, the only way to ensure that the Order members on site weren't all killed was for Dumbledore himself to fight him.

He shook his head, remembering the several occasions where he was summoned to a battle by a frantic Patronus. _He's here! Albus we need you- we're being backed into a corner. Come quickly!_

He blew out the breath he had been holding, continuing to turn the diary over in his hands. He hadn't always been able to get there with enough time to help. Usually if three or four of the Order's stronger duelers teamed up they could hold Tom off long enough to allow the others to retreat, but it rarely ended well for everyone.

_We were incredibly lucky back then, even if it didn't feel like it. Had Tom continued to accompany them into raids and battles we would not have lasted half as long as we did._

And that had been a starting point. He hadn't been sure at the time, but now he could say with some certainty that approximately one year into the official start of the war was when Tom began to focus more on achieving immortality. It's when he stopped actively participating and relied on the Death Eaters he sent in his stead.

There were several methods that were either too well known or extremely unlikely that Dumbledore was able to rule out, but the number of options available to Tom, especially through Dark magic, were limitless.

After his defeat Dumbledore began his research anew, certain that Tom would return eventually. There was no doubt in his mind that he had achieved _some_ level of immortality, that there was _something_ tying him to this world.

The events on the evening of October 31, 1981 were both very clear and very muddled to him. Just as he thought he had understood something another issue would make itself known and he would be forced to reevaluate his progress.

But he was very sure that Lord Voldemort was not gone from their lives. It wasn't until Harry described what had happened underneath the school with Quirrell that he began to suspect that Tom had a Horcrux- or something similar to that magic- anchoring his soul and preserving his powers.

When the diary was handed to him by a dirty and bloody second year he knew he had finally figured it out.

Then it just came down to finding the objects- there had to be at least one more- that Tom had poured a part of his soul into and destroying them.

No small feat, even for Albus Dumbledore. He reexamined every memory he had of the boy, trying to develop a better understanding of the child to attempt to unravel the mysteries surrounding the man he became.

He had been exceptionally gifted, even as a first year. Quiet and polite he might have been, but he possessed a fierce temper and was slow to forgive or forget slights against him.

His raw talent and intelligence naturally drew a crowd among his fellow Slytherins and some of the Ravenclaws and by the end of his second year it was obvious to Dumbledore that he had an impressive command over most of the students in his year, and even over some of the older students.

The changes in his temperament at times had been startling, but almost even worse was that most of the staff, especially Headmaster Dippet, had been oblivious to them.

Horace had been particularly taken with the boy, although many of the professors showed him preferential treatment. Albus hadn't been sure what it was at the time, but Tom had always made him uneasy, and despite his best attempts at talking to him, it seemed that Tom was equally uneasy around him.

Dumbledore was particularly worried when rumors of a monster within the school had ended with several attacks and a student's death. When a third year student, who he knew to have a kind heart, was brought forward by Tom as the culprit he was immediately suspicious, but Dippet had been convinced.

There had been nothing that he could do and he kept a much closer eye on the Slytherin after that. After returning from that summer break, Dumbledore had noticed an extreme shift in the young man for the worse.

Moody and temperamental, the Prefect was less of the perfect student and shining example that he appeared to be in his earlier years.

The other professors chalked it up to the stress of his impending NEWTS and the challenge of going out into the world when he was an orphan with no place to call home.

They were tolerant and kind and only Dumbledore suspected that a deeper problem was the reason behind his change. Tom graduated with extremely high honors from Hogwarts and everyone expected great things from him.

But there was nothing. No Ministry job, no independent research or work. Headmaster Dippet informed the staff that Tom had approached him about the Defense Against the Dark Arts position, but he felt the boy was too young.

They agreed that it would be better if he waited a few years before applying again and waited anxiously for news of his accomplishments but nothing came. There were rumors from classmates that he had travelled to Albania and when he returned he took up a job as an assistant at Borgin & Burkes.

The professors, very much aware of the reputation that the store had, were disappointed and proclaimed Tom Riddle a waste of potential and promise and promptly endeavored to forget about their star pupil.

When rumors began of a powerful wizard gathering followers Dumbledore had been alarmed; his mind hadn't made the connection because Tom hadn't been seen in almost a decade; ever since he came back to Hogwarts to ask Dumbledore, newly made Headmaster, for the position he desired once more. Dumbledore had politely refused and Tom had disappeared once again.

As more people began to follow the unknown wizard more information became available. It was made clear that he supported the somewhat outdated view of pureblood supremacy and advocated a world that Slytherin himself had believed in.

It was not long after that that the raids began in earnest. It had started out on a much smaller scale; Muggle attacks and murders, people going missing, reports of shadowed figures in the night. By the time the Ministry realized what they were dealing with it was almost too late.

Muggleborns and their families were next, and anyone who stood in their way met a gruesome end. Ministry workers, influential politicians, even Hogwarts students; panic spread as the public realized that no one was safe.

The Auror department was slowly stretched thin, although as the war continued they did receive record high numbers of new recruits each June as a new class of students graduated and wanted to help.

Dumbledore had been deeply saddened to see his student's names in the _Daily Prophet's_ section every morning among the listed of those found dead or reported missing.

There had been some hope, though. With the Aurors being slowly outnumbered by the growing number of supporters flocking to the Dark wizard, Dumbledore made it his priority to create a group to aid them.

He hadn't set out to create an army- in fact he tried to avoid that very thing. He had created the Order to help the Aurors and the Ministry by doing what they didn't have time to do- sort through information and collect supplies.

They coordinated with the Intelligence offices in the Auror departments and sifted through the tips and rumors that came pouring in daily. Members with training in dueling and those competent with spells who volunteered investigated the information- checking for traps and assessing the validity and general use of the knowledge before either passing it on to the Aurors, or discarding it.

Those members not involved in that task focused on gathering supplies and materials- both for the Aurors and for the Order. In many cases they were brewing necessary potions, charming portkeys or working towards warding the many houses that held the members and their families.

But as the war continued and the Aurors couldn't keep up with everything being thrown their way, members of the Order began to take the missions upon themselves and had their own confrontations with Death Eaters.

It was a fight, at first, to get the Ministry to let the Order help them. They were reluctant to release any information to the public for fear of causing more panic than was already present, and the Aurors did not want to walk into something that they couldn't handle because someone who wasn't qualified to examine a site had pronounced it clean.

Millicent Bagnold, the Minister for Magic, was hard pressed, however, to turn down help when it was volunteering and came sponsored by Albus Dumbledore. She remained skeptical, but gave them smaller tasks to start out with.

She quickly realized that the Order was not established to usurp her power, nor was it incompetent, and she embraced any aid that they offered. The partnership was extremely beneficial and the hordes of Death Eaters soon began to diminish.

The attacks turned personal quickly after that, vendettas held by Death Eaters and Purebloods finally breaking through the tide of random violence. As the targets were realized, it became a priority to protect them, and raiding parties of their own were planned to strike back.

With the Aurors authorized to use the Unforgivables and prisoners no longer being sent to a Dementor-less Azkaban only to be broken out days later, the tide began to slowly turn.

Information became more reliable, especially once Severus Snape began to volunteer more information than previously communicated. Detailed reports of upcoming plans regarding the Order and the Ministry, and intel on several key Death Eaters helped Dumbledore tremendously. At Snape's own urging, his position remained a secret from everyone except Albus for as long as it could.

Minerva inadvertently stumbled upon Snape sneaking into Hogwarts one night and a terrific duel ensued. Dumbledore snorted lightly, they were lucky that the dungeons were so far away from the students; otherwise someone might have heard them. It hadn't even been curfew yet and some older students were known to linger in the hallways even on weeknights.

Dumbledore, himself, had only been made aware when Minerva's Patronus burst in, exclaiming that she had caught a Death Eater in the dungeons. He had arrived quickly, and would have laughed at the scene if it hadn't been so serious.

Severus was on the floor, tied up and glaring at Minerva, who stood above him with her wand trained on his chest. "My dear," Albus said turning towards his professor. "You are lucky it was only Severus. And as confidant as I am in your skills, I am sure that had Severus not gone lightly against you, your positions would be reversed."

Minerva hadn't taken that well at all and her relationship with the spy was off to a rocky start. Dumbledore had taken them both, Snape Disillusioned of course, up to his office and proceeded to give Minerva the highly edited and rather vague version of how Snape ended up in this position.

Remaining stubborn and less than convinced at Snape's sudden change of heart, the man himself, who had remained silent until that point, plucked his wand from the Headmaster's desk and swore in his quiet, serious voice, his allegiance to Dumbledore and the Order and his promise to never bring her to intentional harm.

Seeing that she was stunned silent, he proceeded to relate the information to Dumbledore that had brought about his visit in the first place.

Snape's information, especially, let Dumbledore plan his moves more carefully in order to ensure some sort of advantage over the situation. Support for the war was waning; and although no one wanted Tom to win, it had been six years of terror and fighting and the wizarding community wanted an end.

Every death now was a friend, a loved one, and they hit close to his heart every time. The names of the major players were known to both sides of the war, and it became a matter of who could take out the other side's lieutenant's first.

With specific targets in mind, Tom Riddle rejoined the war, and the Order hadn't stood a chance. Messengers sent out in the last two or three years suddenly returned with giants, werewolves, vampires, and Dementors, and Tom added to his ranks with Inferi, using the corpses of those he killed.

The Order had taken to destroying the bodies of their dead before burying them, to ensure they couldn't be Raised and used against them.

Despite their best efforts, many of their friends were lost in those final two years of fighting- the McKinnons, the Prewett brothers, Benjy Fenwick, and countless others- and there seemed to be no end.

Of everyone in the Order, besides Dumbledore, four people had become such a thorn in Tom's side that he sought to hunt them down personally.

They were Frank and Alice Longbottom, and Lily and James Potter. The four of them were responsible for a large number of the Order's victories and he had had enough of their interfering.

James, Alice, and Frank were all Aurors and were as talented in dueling as some of his best were- Frank had even lasted against Bellatrix, forcing a draw and her retreat when his reinforcements arrived.

Dumbledore suspected that Tom would have targeted Lily first, but she could be dangerous as well and was safely enclosed in Hogwarts where her charm work and her potions protected her fellow Order members.

Dumbledore had removed everyone to Hogwarts, for the wards there were old and strong and it allowed them all to be in one place to plan their next move.

Snape had informed him that Tom was planning a large-scale attack on Diagon Alley and Hogsmeade. The two locations were meant to separate the group- Dumbledore could only be in one place and whoever went to the other site would be much more vulnerable.

In light of this information, he left the defense of Hogsmeade to the Potters, the Longbottoms, and several others, while he took the remaining group to Diagon Alley.

It was risky, but he hoped it would pay off. After much arguing, neither husband had been able to convince their respective wife to remain in the castle and not join the defense group. Alice had more of a case than Lily did, being an Auror herself.

Surprisingly it had been Peter who had stepped up in Lily's defense and told James that Lily had as much right as anyone to fight and it wouldn't be fair that if James was fighting that he ask Lily to remain behind to worry.

Dumbledore hadn't known what to make of Peter for the longest time. At school he wasn't in the same league as Sirius and James, or even Remus. Sirius and James were smart, good-looking, and athletic. Remus was intelligent, kind, and responsible.

Between the three of them they managed to charm almost every professor to their side and most of the students loved them, despite their propensity to lose House points and cause general mayhem.

Peter, though, almost seemed to join them by default. As the only other Gryffindor boy in that year, there really wasn't anyone else for him to attach himself to and the other boys were either too nice to get rid of him, or they just didn't care.

He hadn't been very talented as a student and was dreadfully timid. Dumbledore observed that Peter had begun to emerge from his shell when he was around his friends, but it wasn't a good change for the boy.

Since he lacked the qualities that drew attention to his three friends, Peter took to pointing out the flaws in others or mocking the victims of his friends' pranks. As their time in school continued, Peter scraped by his OWLS and then later his NEWTS by the skin of his teeth.

Dumbledore found that it was easy to forget about Peter at some times. His friends continued in their sixth year with harder courses and Peter was left alone because he didn't qualify for them.

Looking back now, it was curious that none of the Slytherin students, especially those who were frequently tormented by the Marauders, as he learned they called themselves, had not made a target of the boy when he was alone those final two years.

The war had begun to really pick up during their fifth year, and by the time their class graduated, it had completely invaded all of wizarding Britain.

The Order was beginning to take up missions of their own at that point and Dumbledore asked many of that graduating class to join the Order. He was pleased when James and Sirius enthusiastically agreed and promised to bring around Remus and Lily, who each wanted time to think about it.

He did not pressure them in the decision; it was a serious choice and he secretly applauded their apprehension. But they, too, joined, and at their first meeting he was surprised to see Peter accompanying them as well.

It was natural, of course, to assume that Peter was welcome because he had been there with them throughout school, but Dumbledore had hoped that the boy would recognize that he didn't have the temperament for the coming fight.

For the rest of the war they were invaluable members, quickly establishing their competence and vaulting to the forefront of the war. Remus and Lily went on several missions, but were content in most cases to remain on the sidelines and help in other aspects and Peter found ways to make himself busy but took almost no missions.

If he was being honest, Dumbledore realized that he should have restricted Peter's access to valuable information but there were too many things calling for his attention and Peter, if nothing else, was inconspicuous.

Even now, going over his memories and reflecting, he could not pinpoint when exactly Peter had changed sides. Towards the end of the war things were getting hectic and more of their friends were dying.

He recalled a mission, one of the last ones, where Remus was the only one to return and was only superficially injured. Tempers were high and they had long since suspected that a spy was among their ranks.

The attack party had not been a small one and grieving family members and friends pointed the finger of blame at Remus. As he recalled, it was about four months after Harry's birth and Lily and James were strung out with worry for him and the prophecy.

Peter had suggested that it wouldn't be such a bad idea to change locations before going deeper into hiding and maybe they shouldn't tell Remus where they could be found.

Lily had rejected his taciturn support of the idea that Remus was a traitor and turned to Dumbledore who could only reply honestly, 'Changing your hiding place _would_ be a smart idea. You've remained there for almost six months and the wards are not infallible. I would suggest selecting one person and appointing them Secret Keeper. Involve no one else.'

It had taken them some time to reconcile the fact that they couldn't be sure, even among their closest friends, who they could trust. The war did not abate enough to give them the time necessary to decide their course of action, and it was a little over half a year later that they decided.

Their safe house had been changed three times since Peter's suggestion and they were despairing that nowhere was safe for them and their son. They appealed to Dumbledore and conceded to being protected by a Fidelius Charm.

Dumbledore performed the charm with Sirius as the Keeper in late May; that had been the last time he had seen either of the Potters alive. He was aware of their location, but, as per the Charm, could not tell anyone and Sirius hadn't granted him access to the house.

Any messages for Lily and James that needed to be delivered were sent via Patronus. James continued with several missions during his time in hiding but Lily remained at home with Harry.

There had been nothing in Sirius's manner to give away the coming events that October, and Dumbledore remained unaware that Lily had changed the conditions of the Charm. At Sirius's insistence, he later learned, they had changed Secret Keepers and switched to Peter sometime in September.

If Dumbledore had to guess, he would say the change was insisted on by James as well. The two of them had been as close as brothers and it probably didn't sit well with James knowing that Sirius could be caught and tortured because of him.

The events of the that Halloween played out and he was only aware of what had happened by the _pull_ on his magic, which he later guessed to be the Killing Curse rebounding on Tom.

Powerful magic of that type always called out across the community; he felt a similar pull last summer when Tom was reborn and decades earlier when he had defeated Grindelwald.

He headed over to Godric's Hollow, the Secret no longer Kept, and was shocked at the devastation. The house was just _gone_, and normal spell damage didn't produce those effects, even with a spell as strong as the Killing Curse.

He first pulled out his wand, casting several revealing charms to determine if anyone or any curses were laying in wait. Finding nothing, he walked forward and found James's body close to where the front door used to be and gave a shuddering sigh, turning away sadly.

The upstairs had collapsed on itself, the support beams mostly gone, and he picked his way across the rubble carefully, spying Lily's red hair.

Lily, too, was dead and the grief threatened to overwhelm him until he heard an infant's cry. Following the noise quickly, he found baby Harry in the remains of his crib, which had miraculously withstood both the explosion and backlash and offered the boy some protection.

Harry looked worse for the wear, though, and was dirty and crying. As Dumbledore moved forward to hold the child, he found a small amount of blood cascading down his forehead. He shifted the boy's bangs to wipe it off and gasped when he saw the cut.

It was much too defined to be an accident and it pulsed faintly with power against his fingers as he outlined it gently. He could feel the evil rolling off of the injury and he placed Harry down again, studying the scene around him again.

The explosion made things more difficult, of course, but he could assume with some certainty that both Lily and James were killed before the explosion; otherwise he would have expected them to be closer to Harry in order to shield him.

Most likely they were victims of the Killing Curse, but there was nothing to suggest how it happened or what resulted in the magical backlash that destroyed the house.

It was impossible to perform Legilimency on a child Harry's age- the invasion and extra magic would leave him permanently damaged. But in a place like this, imbued with magic, there was usually some imprint of what happened.

Stronger wizards could pick up on it and search through the magic for the cause. Lesser wizards and sometimes even Muggles could feel something but would not understand it- they usually got goosebumps or the feeling of someone watching them.

Keeping one eye on Harry, Dumbledore searched for the residual magic, pulling it to him and waiting for it to settle. It screamed of evil- a vile, unnatural, twisted evil and Dumbledore frowned because the house felt that way _before_ the spells began.

He ignored the common spells- the unlocking charm, invisibility charm, and a few others- and was gripped by a powerful hate as the ghost of a green spell shrieked past him and dissipated around where James's body lay.

He followed the magic, sensing a smaller shift in its course. He frowned, watching the spell being woven- frantic and powerful- and it was only after it took shape and was directed towards Harry that he realized what Lily had done.

The spell didn't hit the boy but flowed over him and Dumbledore risked breaking through the magic to walk over to Lily's body. He carefully moved the rubble until he uncovered her arm and turned it palm up, only to recoil at the bright red line that marred the inside of her wrist. He stood, one hand on his mouth and mind a mile away.

Feeling sick he felt the curse shoot past him once again, striking the imaginary body of the red head, and he looked once more to Lily's body. _She knew it was coming. How did I not see this?_

And the green curse was flying towards its third victim, except this time it was met by more powerful magic, being drawn from the witch and circling around her child, repelling the curse and sending it back at its castor.

Having determined that the attacker was alone and powerful, Dumbledore decided that it could only be Tom, and watched intently as the spell hit him.

It was incredible to watch but Dumbledore simultaneously felt a horrible feeling of dread upon seeing the spell strike. Tom's soul, which was weakly outlined by his magic, was a mangled imitation of the souls that he had seen when first James, then Lily, and finally Harry had been brought into the ambient magic.

It was disfigured and incomplete- two halves of the soul screaming in their wrongness. He sucked in a breath as the spell struck and the shadowy body fell, being claimed by the magic and disintegrating.

One of the halves of his soul was pulled by another spell; Dumbledore was at a loss to explain how the spell was cast, although it originated from something within the body that was being destroyed.

The spell and soul fraction shot towards the closest thing; Harry. The other half lingered for only a moment before fading away from the house, lost to the magic.

Breaking the connection, Dumbledore's mind was reeling from all that he learned and suspected. _Too much. It's too much to comprehend_. He turned on the spot, apparating back to Hogwarts without fully comprehending that he had left Harry in the ruins of his house.

He realized it later and cursed his absentmindedness at leaving the boy alone. The Headmaster quickly sent a Patronus to Hagrid to fetch the child immediately and await further instructions. His mind still unable to grasp everything that had happened he wondered dimly just where he would put Harry.

If the Potter's location had been betrayed it had to have been Sirius's doing, which made his position as godfather null and void in Dumbledore's opinion. He couldn't see Peter being a good guardian for the boy, and Remus had been distant and disconnected from the Potters.

His only thoughts were of getting the boy away from the wizarding world until he could process everything and figure out what had happened. He recalled that Lily had a Muggle sister and quickly tracked down her old records from school to find a name and address.

It was a simple matter after that to find Petunia Dursley née Evans and send another Patronus to Hagrid with an address to meet him at. He penned a quick letter to Petunia, explaining the situation vaguely and even now he couldn't remember exactly what he had written.

The shock from what he had seen was too much to be digested in such a short amount of time. He set off for the Dursley's residence and was surprised to see Minerva there. She questioned him and he could only barely answer her, sure of nothing at that point.

He left Harry on his aunt's doorstep, determined to sort through the events of the last day and regain control of the situation. He hoped that Harry's position would only be temporary, but then Peter had been 'murdered' and Sirius had been sent to Azkaban.

Dumbledore was sure at this point that Sirius, guilty or not, would not be a suitable guardian for Harry and would only be a further burden on both himself and the community in general if he were to be somehow found innocent.

Dumbledore would not believe his innocence and did not want to hear whatever defense Sirius offered for betraying his friends, so he allowed the Wizengamot to send him to Azkaban and didn't push for a trial. He had cast the Fidelius Charm himself, and for him that was enough for the moment.

He often thought back to his decision that day, but it would be twelve years before he thought back on it with guilt. When Harry and his friends turned up in the Hospital Wing proclaiming Sirius's innocence he had been beyond skeptical.

As he listened to the story, however, he had to admit that it could be possible. He knew for certain, at least, that if he did nothing and allowed Sirius to be Kissed that he would never uncover the truth.

And he had to admit to himself that if Sirius wanted Harry dead he would have done so earlier that night, or even twelve years ago. He had gone to Severus to double check and the Potions Master had admitted there had been ample time before he had arrived for Black to kill Harry, despite Remus, Hermione, and Ron being present.

Willing to give the man another chance, he hinted to Hermione that she could save two lives and left with a small smile. In another three hours, when he returned and saw their triumphant faces, he knew he had been wrong about Sirius and tracked him down to Remus's small house later that summer for the full account of what happened.

Dumbledore shook of those thoughts, focusing once more on the development of Tom's Horcruxes. The attacks on Hogsmeade and Diagon Alley had come as expected, and the Order members were stationed nearby, waiting for their respective signals from scouts who were waiting for the attack. Had they been there when the attack began, Tom would have suspected that a spy leaked the information.

Within minutes of the appearance of the Death Eaters the scouts sent out a Patronus and only ten minutes after they arrived, there were Order members on the scene. Dumbledore and his group in Diagon Alley made quick work of the Death Eaters sent their way with only a few casualties on their side.

The injured and dead were quickly brought to Hogwarts, and the prisoners were Stunned and distributed among the survivors with speedy plans being laid out for which safe houses could be used.

He remembered being suspicious as to why the group sent to Diagon Alley had been so weak, but said nothing to the others. The aged wizard waited until the last member left, and then double-checked the abandoned street before Disapparating, his destination firmly in mind.

Hogsmeade had been fairly unrecognizable with the destruction. Small fires from missed curses burned sporadically, buildings were crumbling around those remaining, and the dead and injured littered the streets.

Still hearing shouts of spells nearby, he quickly made his way only to see the survivors battling Tom and a handful of his most skilled subordinates. Dumbledore joined the fray, focusing on getting to Tom but trying to take note of the faces that he saw among those still standing.

He could see James and Sirius back to back to back with Lily. Frank and Remus were similarly engaged, but he couldn't see Alice anywhere. He sidestepped a wild curse and caught sight of her out of the corner of his eye. She was down, with no noticeable damage, but her eyes were closed and there was no hint of a reaction to the mayhem around her.

Upon seeing Dumbledore shooting spells and weakening his remaining Death Eaters, Tom gave a snarl and Disapparated. Seeing their Lord leave, the survivors fought harder to keep the Death Eaters there, but as soon as they were able to they escaped, some of them bringing an injured comrade with them.

With their enemies gone, the Order turned to checking on their friends, and Frank ran immediately to Alice's side, furious and scared at the same time. She was alive, but barely, and not even Dumbledore could discern which spell it was that caused the damage.

They brought Alice and the others to Madame Pomfrey, who had insisted that she help in whatever Dumbledore was involved in.

Pomfrey had also been unable to identify the curse, and could only treat the symptoms, which were getting worse by the hour. Dumbledore felt sad at the impending death of such a bright young woman, but tried to take solace in the obvious victory that they had earned today.

Hogwarts had been quiet that night, the sorrow and soreness from the earlier battle carrying everyone into a troubled sleep, but Dumbledore remained awake long into the night.

Finally, as he expected, the stone gargoyle to his office alerted him that someone had given the password, and a shadow unveiled itself. 'Severus,' he had acknowledged.

The other man was silent, the only thing giving away his position was the slight shaking that racked his frame. 'Who was hit?' He demanded suddenly.

Not knowing what he meant, Dumbledore remained silent. Snape spoke up again, his voice urgent_, '_Dolohov's curse. Who did it hit?'

He was starting to see the connection but waited for Snape to clarify. He did so with a cry of frustration, 'I might be able to heal them provided it hasn't progressed too far. But tell me WHO IT WAS!'

Dumbledore remained unaffected by the outburst but replied, 'Alice Longbottom. She's laying in the Hospital Wing now. Poppy doesn't know the curse, neither do I.'

Snape's face contorted with remembered pain briefly_, '_Of course you don't. Dolohov created it_._' Dumbledore didn't prod and asked instead, 'You'll heal her?'

Snape faltered, and remained silent for several minutes before whispering, 'yes'and Disillusioning himself.

He followed Dumbledore to the Hospital Wing where he watched as the Headmaster persuaded the nurse to leave while he tried something for Alice.

She left moments later, and Snape appeared once again, making his way over to her bed. Her breathing was labored and he opened his cloak, pulling out several vials of potions and arranging them by her bedside.

Without even glancing towards Dumbledore he pulled out his wand and slowly traced a path in the air from her head to her chest, the movements complicated and precise.

As his wand moved he chanted a string of words in a beat, almost a song, never once breaking the wand movements or words. After several minutes he stopped and gently administered the first potion, helping it down her throat with magic.

He repeated this process three times. Dumbledore watched him, impressed at the way that the young man was handling himself. The magic was taxing and complicated, but even as Snape showed signs of his fatigue there was nothing lost from his movements or words.

One potion remained when his wand finally stilled and he sank to his knees in exhaustion. Dumbledore moved to stand by his side, pulling him up and placing him on the side of the next bed.

Snape waved him off, trying to even out his own breathing, which was heavy from exertion. He surveyed the boy's work; Alice looked entirely improved. Her color had returned and her breathing was deep and even. He touched her hand and was pleased when she moved in her sleep, responding to his touch. He turned back to Severus, 'Thank you, my friend. This means more than you could ever know to many people.'

Snape nodded but didn't answer the praise, instead saying, 'She'll need the last potion when she wakes. Will you be able to remember the spell if I teach you the movements and words? I'm sure others have suffered from it and died. Dolohov has been liberal in its use.'

Dumbledore answered firmly, 'I will remember it.' Satisfied, Snape answered, 'Good. Make sure to warn your people about Dolohov. The curse is purple. And I will supply you with more potions. Just be sure to remember when to administer them.'

They spent the rest of the night going over the spell but it was during one of their breaks, back in the Headmaster's office that Dumbledore learned some information about Tom that would help put all the pieces together years later.

He had paused in their practice, pretending an interest in having tea, but actually concerned for the young man in front of him. As well as Alice appeared earlier Snape now appeared equally worse.

Dumbledore had asked him about it and Snape dutifully explained that the spell was taxing and demanded full concentration. Dumbledore had replied offhandedly, 'I'm sure suffering from the after effects of the Cruciatus Curse doesn't make it easier.'

To his credit, Snape's face barely betrayed his shock at the abrupt comment and he merely replied, 'Indeed it doesn't_._'

Surprised at the admission, Dumbledore continued, 'Was he always like this?'

Snape took his time answered, 'No...he wasn't. In the beginning it was easy to ignore the death and the pain that we were causing. He had a plan, he said. It wouldn't always be like this and soon we would be on top of the world, where we belonged. He changed, though. Became less tolerant of failure, even though his demands became increasingly harder, sometimes bordering on impossible. He started punishing us, torturing us. Sometimes for failure, sometimes for no reason at all. We all noticed it, it was impossible not to.'

Dumbledore looked completely serious, 'When was this?'

Snape frowned, remembering, 'It was gradual but it started about three years ago.'Sitting back in his chair Dumbledore looked contemplative.

'Thank you, Severus. You've been extremely helpful and I thank you for Alice from the bottom of my heart, dear boy.'

Snape recognized the dismissal and inclined his head to the wizard, Disillusioning himself and leaving the office. The Headmaster stayed at his desk for the rest of the night, toying with the new information in his head.

When light finally broke across the grounds he stood stiffly and walked to rouse Frank, knowing he would appreciate the good news.

He would not be certain in his assumption about the Horcrux for another decade or so, and once his suspicions had finally been confirmed, it had been only two short years after that that Tom had returned.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Bloody hell, Hermione. I don't like it," startled by the suddenness of the comment she turned to her red headed friend.

"What don't you like?" she asked, half expecting him to answer her with some stupid reason about how homework was actually a waste of time.

"I don't like where my thoughts have been taking me," he responded, looking entirely too serious to be Ron. "You know, with the- the _thing_."

Well that was more like it. "Huh?" she replied stupidly, not following her friend at all and wondering where her vocabulary and brain had gone.

"With the Order," he whispered, moving close to her ear so he didn't have to say it very loud. They weren't exactly alone in the hallway and Harry looked at them curiously.

"OH!" she exclaimed, "We only have one more class, Ron. Can it wait?" Much as she wanted, _needed,_ whatever information Ron had thought of that had him on edge, the thought of skipping class made her nauseous.

Ron nodded and moved towards Harry to explain it to him as they made their way to the classroom. The class dragged on for everyone just by merit of it being Friday afternoon, and once it was over everyone fairly sprinted from the room.

Grabbing his friends, Ron hauled them to the side of the hallway. "Where are we going to go?"

Hermione chewed her lip, "We absolutely can't let anyone hear this so the common room is out. Let's try to find an empty classroom. There's a bunch on the lower floors that are never used."

They wandered around, checking doors until they found a room far enough away from everything else that no one would hear them. The room was dusty and dirty but a few spells from Hermione had the place looking a little better.

They each settled on top of a table and turned to Ron. "I don't like it," he said again.

Harry rolled his eyes, "Get on with it. I have a meeting with Dumbledore after dinner, remember?"

Ron's eyes widened, "Maybe we should wait until after that, then?"

"What? No!" Harry said. "We're already here and it's not as if we know anything for sure. This is just what you think."

"Yeah, mate, but if it's bad enough when _I_ thought of it..." he trailed off, uncertain how he should end the sentence.

"Then imagine what it could actually be like with a wizard like Dumbledore running it," Hermione finished grimly.

Harry gave a small laugh, looking uncertainly between his two friends, "You're making it sound like he's Voldemort or something."

When they both remained silent he got angry, "It's _Dumbledore_ for crying out loud! What the hell is wrong with you guys!"

"Harry, wait," Hermione called as he headed towards the door. "I'm sure we're just overreacting. You're right. Go to your meeting with Dumbledore after dinner and we'll all talk when you get back."

Unable to believe his friends he just shrugged and walked out the door angrily. After he left Hermione turned to Ron, "Spill."

He rolled his eyes, "I think I should be asking that of you. What'd Dumbledore do to get on your bad side?"

"W-What do you mean?" She asked. "He's not on my bad side."

"Hermione, stop. We both know how bad you are at lying when it comes to me and Harry. I'll give you some credit because of the time turner but that was more to the fact that we hardly saw you and you promised McGonagall that you wouldn't say anything."

Sighing, Hermione knew he was right. "I'll tell you after you tell me what you thinks going on. I'd rather hear what you have to say because what I think is going on is pretty awful and I'd rather not say it if we're thinking two completely different things."

Satisfied with her answer, Ron started, "I thought about it all yesterday and today. I didn't even sleep last night. Once I got started a million different things kept popping up. If it's true, then I've got to hand it to Dumbledore- the man's got to be a bloody genius to keep it all straight.

"Anyway, I started off with where I thought he would start- the purpose. So, we know that the Order was started during the first war and that Dumbledore created it. We assumed that its function then was the same as we think its function is now."

Hermione raised an eyebrow, confused at his wording but understanding the gist of it.

"When he created it, Dumbledore probably wasn't planning on taking responsibility for fighting the war. The Ministry was pretty good about helping last time and the Aurors were really strong. Plus, it's expensive fighting a war. I don't really see where Dumbledore could have legitimately gotten the money to fund all of this, and I don't want to think about how he got it if it wasn't through the normal means."

From the way he said it Hermione interpreted 'normal' to mean 'legal' and shuddered. "Wait, what do you mean war's expensive? I get that it would cost the Ministry, but that's partly because it's a job for the Aurors. Aren't the Order members volunteers?"

Ron grimaced, "I think so. But that's not the point. Even without paying the people in the Order, they needed food, supplies, potions, ingredients, they could have contracted outside experts for spells or wards, and they needed money to get information."

At Hermione's confused look Ron gave a theatric sigh, but secretly he was enjoying knowing something she didn't.

"Bribes, Hermione. To pay off informants or to get people to look the other way on something. So anyway, the Ministry fighting the war was the best option- at least from my view. I would have let them fight it and helped where they needed it.

"But then the war got bad. My parents used to tell us stories when we were little to scare us but the more I think about them, the more I realize that they were all probably true. So it gets worse, and my next move is to make sure that we don't lose the war- no matter what it takes.

"I don't really know all the details- if there were actually battles or just small attacks, but I know it got really bad around '79 and ended, obviously, with Harry on Halloween 1981. So if I'm Dumbledore, I'm wondering why You-Know-Who's targeting the Potters.

"My dad mentioned once that it was practically his priority to kill them towards the end. And we know some of what happened that night. Pettigrew was, for some reason, included in the plan to hide Harry and his parents, while Lupin was left in the dark."

Hermione nodded and interjected, "Sirius said that they thought Lupin was the spy, so something probably happened before that to make him look guilty or suspicious. Actually-"

"It was probably Pettigrew," Ron picked up her trail. "He must have done something to get them to suspect Lupin. So when Harry and his parents go into hiding, it's only Dumbledore, him, and Sirius who know where. But they switched at the last minute, and Pettigew was the Secret Keeper."

Ron's eyes were shining, excited that they had made new progress, but Hermione was more dejected, _how did Dumbledore not know that Pettigrew was a Death Eater?_

She turned to Ron, "What next?"

"Well, with Harry's parents dead and You-Know-Who apparently gone, I'd find somewhere for Harry before trying to pick up the other pieces. With Pettigrew dead, Lupin suspected of being a traitor, and Sirius in prison, I guess I can see why Harry went to his aunt. But he could have been brought up knowing magic and being appreciated and stuff- any family would've been happy to have him. Why send him to a place where he wouldn't fit in?"

They were both silent for a moment, thinking it over. Ron gave a small smile, "I love doing this but I hate when I get to something and I know I'm missing some piece of information that would make it come together."

Hermione's mouth was drawn into a tight frown, "What?" he asked.

"Sirius didn't track down Pettigrew for a little while after the Potters died" she said quietly. "And if Dumbledore didn't know that they switched Secret Keepers, wouldn't he think it was Sirius?"

Ron wasn't following, "That was the whole point of the problem in our third year, wasn't it?"

"Well, yes, but let me ask you this. Wouldn't you go after Sirius? If you're Dumbledore and the Potters are dead and Sirius was supposed to be the Secret Keeper, wouldn't you want to catch him and figure out what happened?"

"'Course I would. But they caught him after Pettigrew framed him and escaped."

"So why wasn't he given a trial?" Now Ron's eyes cleared and the thoughts clicked.

"Because if he was a traitor he'd have information. At the very least I'd drug him with a truth potion and ask him about the Death Eaters. Not all the Death Eaters got trials, but most of the more well known ones did- they got the chance to lower their sentence for information."

"Exactly. So why didn't Sirius- who was accused of being Voldemort's right-hand man- get interrogated at the very least?"

Ron paled, connecting the dots. "The Wizengamot is run by the Ministry, but during the war, all the trials were judged by a special group, overseen by the Chief Warlock."

Hermione nodded, "And Dumbledore's held that position for decades."

Ron blew out a breath, "This is bad. This is huge and bad and how has no one else seen this?"

Hermione snapped at him, "Keep going. It won't get any better."

"Shit," he pulled his hair again and peeked his head up slowly. "Ok, fine. With the war over, the Order doesn't really serve a purpose. I'd disband it. It would be a good network of people to stay in touch with, though, from what I can tell.

"I probably would have recruited important people who could have made a difference in the war- high-ranking Ministry officials if I could convince them, lower ranking ones regardless. Some Aurors probably. The staff at Hogwarts most likely, and students from the graduating classes of each year."

Ron grimaced, realizing what he was about to say. "I'd have hand pick the best from each year. Start looking for them in fifth or sixth year and slowly bring them in until asking them to join the Order. That way they'd be in the Order before anything else came up- jobs, families, whatever."

Hermione was biting her lip and he was starting to feel sick, but he said, "So then Harry comes back after the Third Task saying You-Know-Who's back. And he's already fought him twice before. So I need to get the Order back together and the Ministry on my side. Except Fudge is a moron and doesn't believe me. Don't really know why he doesn't believe Dumbledore, actually. Not like Diggory just kicked the bucket for the hell of it. But then Moody- er, Crouch is exposed and it's kind of obvious that Dumbledore doesn't have everything as under control as we had hoped.

"So if I'm Dumbledore, I want information about You-Know-Who. Inside information so I can get ahead of him before it turns bad. Remember after the Third Task, when Sirius and Snape were both in the room? He made them shake hands and said they're on the same side, but then he told Snape that he knew what he had to ask him to do. And Snape looked- I dunno, but he wasn't happy."

"He looked scared." Hermione said, recalling that night vividly.

"Sure," he agreed. "I actually think Harry might be right about Snape- him being a spy I mean."

Hermione nodded but didn't reply. "It's the only thing that makes sense," he insisted. "My dad was just out of school when Snape was a first year and he said that most of the kids in Snape's House turned out to be Death Eaters. He was the same year that Harry's parents and Sirius and them were at school. They would have graduated right in the middle of the war- when it was getting worse.

"Snape probably joined- he was a git anyway, so why not join You-Know-Who, and Dumbledore convinced him to spy somehow. So he had to do something for spying that night, I bet.

Hermione looked up like she was begging him to stop; by it was far too late for that. Ron had been chewing on this all night and he needed an answer.

"So now I'd get the Order back. Dumbledore told Sirius to gather the 'old crowd,' right? With everyone from the first war coming back I'm looking to recruit more people. Especially if the Ministry isn't going to have my back this time and any battle will fall on the Order until they decide that You-Know-Who is back for real."

Hermione was looking at him in awe, not suspecting that Ron would have been able to dissect everything and reassemble it to such detail. A lot of what he said made so much sense that it was easy to forget it was just speculation.

Ron gave a nervous smile at her look and tapped his head, "Not just a coat rack my friend." She laughed, grateful that he seemed like the Ron she knew and loved. "A _hat_ rack, Ron."

"I knew that" he huffed. "So is your stuff wrong?" He asked hopefully, not ready to have more of his assumptions and views shattered around him.

His hope was squashed however, when he saw the look on Hermione's face. "No," she said dully. "If anything this kind of makes more sense but it also makes it a lot worse."

Ron settled back on the table and gestured with his hand for her to start. "I realized it first when I was thinking about the string of DADA teachers we've had and then it all just sort of hit me. I'm surprised I didn't see it sooner, actually. Each of them was connected in some way to Harry. Quirrell with Voldemort in the back of his head and the Stone being here. Lockhart being a fake but still going with you both to the Chamber of Secrets. Lupin being a friend of Harry's dad as well as Sirius and Pettigrew. And Moody last year entering Harry's name in the tournament and being a Death Eater.

"Shouldn't Dumbledore have noticed that something was off with Quirrell? I mean, we noticed as first years that he wasn't quite right- and everyone thought he was a joke anyway- but how did he not realize that Quirrell was possessed by Voldemort? And if he wanted the Stone safe, why put it behind a door he told us not to go into- really only making sure that everyone was curious as to what was behind it- and guarding it with tasks and riddles that _three first years_ could figure out. And he was _conveniently _away when we needed him, only to reappear after we were done.

Ron's mouth was slightly open, dumbfounded by what Hermione was proposing. "You think that _Dumbledore_ was responsible- the direct cause- for what happened to Harry?"

Hermione began to wring her hands, "I know! I know it sounds crazy- this hit me last week and I swore I wouldn't say anything. But you kind of suggested it and he has a lot of influence. Just think about it. I went back through our years at Hogwarts- think about everything we've gotten in to and everything that happened.

"_Everything is connected to Harry_," Hermione was pacing and continued wringing her hands as her voice became louder. "Even the things that don't seem to be about him turn out to be about him. Dumbledore could have easily persuaded Crouch to get Harry out of that stupid tournament last year but he didn't. And all the problems with the DADA teachers, and just _everything_."

Ron was silent for several minutes and then finally said, "Well, I'm sure he's not responsible for _everything_." That got a smile out of Hermione.

"But most of it, yeah, it sounds like it," he finished. "This is so unbelievably bad. There's no way this is right. We're the _only_ ones to see this? No way he's fooled everyone else: my parents, McGonagall, _Snape_. C'mon. We're seeing things the way we want to see them."

"Or that's what he wants us to think" Hermione returned. Ron groaned. "No, Ron, I'm serious. We both came to similar conclusions. Maybe everyone else isn't as clueless as we think they are, or maybe they've been fooled.

"It wouldn't be the first time we were right about something and the adults wouldn't listen or didn't see it for themselves. And this doesn't make Dumbledore the bad guy. I'm not saying he's Voldemort-"

"Stop saying that name!" Ron yelled. "I let it go before but I can't take it any more."

"Fine, You-Know-Who! No one can argue that Dumbledore is basically the icon for the Light side. I'm just saying..." Another cry of frustration. "I don't even know what I'm trying to say. But Dumbledore can't be the bad guy. He just can't be."

Ron hopped off his table and gripped her in a hug as she cried. "We'll figure this out, Hermione. It'll be ok. And you'll always have me and Harry. No matter what."

She tightened her grip on him and cried out her frustrations, confusion, and the sense of betrayal that had haunted her for the past week.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Wow, so kinda nothing but sorta a lot happened in this chapter. I was finally getting a sense of where I want this to go but every time I sit down to write something new pops into my head and I end up changing what I had planned for that chapter.

Anyway, it's important background and character establishment, yadda yadda.

I promise it'll get interesting soon.

I'd really appreciate some feedback! I'll probably keep switching p.o.v between a couple characters- keeps it interesting, I think. Let me know if you hate it though!

Always

Sinkme


	17. Chapter 17

Ch. 17

Maintenance:

_Thought_

"Normal speaking"

"_Spell"_

_Nonverbal Spell_

"_Parseltounge"_

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Snape was finishing the last of the outstanding essays he had to grade; it was the last weekday of his enforced 'vacation.' He would return to teaching on Monday. Cognizant of the time and energy it would eat up, he decided to approach the Dark Lord before then. _Better to do it while I am at full capacity. _

His attention was shifted to the fireplace when a message came through the Floo. It was late on Friday night and he suspected that he already knew what the note was about. Sure enough, it was a summons from Dumbledore for an Order meeting to take place within the hour.

The note suggested that it was extremely urgent. Snape's stomach clenched in anticipation; he'd have his work cut out for him later.

He could go to the Headmaster now and explain what had really happened, but he'd learned through experience that sometimes Albus Dumbledore didn't need to know everything. Sometimes the truth was too good.

So he finished the essays and double-checked the potions stock for the students until he deemed it an acceptable time to depart. He took a handful of Floo powder from the mantle and breathed deeply, steeling himself.

"Headmaster's office," he called as he stepped through the green fire. As anticipated, Dumbledore was waiting at his desk. Snape assumed that he wanted to talk to his spy before leaving him to the tender mercies of the Order.

"Headmaster," Snape greeted him, placing his mental shields up and calling on his mask. "Shall we? Your note sounded important."

Dumbledore gave him a piercing look but did not comment and instead asked bluntly, "Did you know?"

Snape returned the look, his voice hard, "No. But I would suggest you think hard about asking me that in the future, Headmaster."

Snape was tired of getting the third degree from everyone in the Order and then being lectured by the Headmaster when the man's hands were far from clean.

Not sparing a glance back, Snape once again went through the Floo. He emerged from the fireplace in 12 Grimmauld Place to see everyone in general chaos.

Unfortunately his entrance was not as inconspicuous as he had hoped and immediately the attention turned to him. Pushing his way through them he went to his usual corner, ignoring the voices that questioned him and called him traitor.

Dumbledore entered moments later and the voices finally quieted, a sense of order returning to them in the presence of the Headmaster.

"Please sit down, everyone. We have much to discuss and the hour is already late" he was calm but almost everyone could see the storm in his eyes.

Moody, direct as always, began the meeting, "So it's true then?" His magical eye swiveled to look at Snape but his head remained facing Albus.

Snape maintained his aloof and disinterested appearance; at this point it would be better to pretend he didn't know what was happening.

"Yes" Dumbledore bowed his head briefly. "Hestia and Sturgis are dead."

The outcry was immediate and everyone was on their feet again. It continued for several minutes until Kinglsey's deep voice cut through everyone, addressing the heart of the matter, "Why didn't we hear anything about this?"

Everyone was quiet once more and unconsciously turned towards either Dumbledore or Snape.

Shacklebolt continued, "There was no information in the Auror department to suggest that this was coming. It was actually rather quiet."

Before Dumbledore could answer Moody pointed a finger at Snape, "What's the word then Snape? Don't tell me-" he mocked. "You didn't hear anything about an attack. What good are you if you can't tell us when two of our own- two of our friends!- are going to be killed. What good are you if Sirius is captured and you just let him sit there? I bet you're loving th-"

"Enough!" Surprisingly it was Minerva and not Dumbledore who yelled. Snape watched her closely, _why is she defending me? The last time she tried to help me I was awful to her_.

"Severus does the best he can. He couldn't possibly be included in everything. We have been lax and-."

Moody was back, "So it's _their_ fault?"

Snape couldn't resist that one, "Well, Moody, if I recall, your motto is 'constant vigilance,' is it not?"

It was worth the self-suffering look Minerva shot him that practically screamed 'now is not the time!'

That created another uproar and several members were, rightly, upset and disgusted with what they perceived as Snape's indifference to the death of two of their own.

Molly Weasley made her way closer to Severus; "It's your fault that they're dead and you can't even honor their memories!" she spat. Arthur pulled her back and Snape caught the look in his eye; apologetic but wary.

He turned away, disgusted with himself because it was, in truth, his fault, and now he had to act like the wronged party.

"My friends, please-" Albus tried to get everyone under control again but Snape didn't notice. Moody had made his way over as well and Snape needed his full focus at the moment.

He glared as Moody spoke again, "Go ahead, traitor. Explain yourself." Snape shook his head, tired of the Order and their hypocritical approach to the war and their treatment of him despite his guilt in this instance.

"Would it matter, Moody?" He asked rhetorically. "Even if I looked you in the eye and told you I didn't know this attack was coming, you wouldn't believe me."

Moody nodded savagely, "Damn right I wouldn't."

Snape shrugged, "Then I won't bother." He pushed past the old Auror and slipped out of the room, ignoring the calls after him demanding that he stay. He didn't even hesitate before going back through the Floo to Hogwarts.

With Snape gone the chaos gradually decreased and everyone turned once again to the Headmaster. Albus could only hang his head in shame, "Everyone must be on alert. Tom and his followers are moving more quickly than we anticipated. At this point everyone is a target."

He fell back in his chair and Minerva felt a flash of irritation that he didn't defend Severus. She pursed her lips, holding back her biting comments on his behalf as a soft voice spoke from her side.

"And we wonder why he's so unpleasant" Remus muttered to her. "I can't blame him. We're almost as single-mindedly judgmental as the Death Eaters are."

Without anyone to focus their anger on, they soon fell into silence once more. The meeting continued without Snape, as almost everyone had something to report and they could ill afford to stop their efforts at the present time.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Snape was not angry as he strode back to his room in the dungeons. It was too easy to be angry and he was loath to feel that particular emotion because it would mean that their barbs had struck.

Once in his rooms he quickly changed robes; a clean and darker black one replacing his slightly worn one. He retrieved a small item from his worktable and placed it in his pocket before removing his Portkey.

Fashion was by no means something that the Dark Lord required. But there was something indescribable about looking good. And Snape would need every bit of confidence tonight to pull this off. He activated his Portkey and opened his eyes once the spinning stopped.

Black looked surprised, his hand was poised over a letter he seemed to be in the middle of. He let out a breath when he saw it was Snape.

"Never thought you'd be relieved to see me," he said. Black gave a wry laugh.

"You're not so bad compared to some of the alternatives," Black shrugged. "You here to fix the wards?"

He jerked a thumb over his shoulder to point to the warded cabinet that housed his wand and would hold the letter he was drafting until he was ready for Oreo to deliver it.

Sirius figured the wand and a warded cabinet was damning enough if they were discovered, so he after he read the letters he received he threw them in the fire.

Snape nodded, "I will check over that now. But I am actually here to talk with the Dark Lord."

Black flinched, "Good or bad?"

"We shall see," Snape responded. He hesitated, but decided that Lupin would most likely inform Black anyway. "Hestia and Sturgis were killed last night."

Black looked genuinely surprised, and then upset. "How?" he asked.

"Their patrol around Godric's Hollow was discovered," Snape explained. "There is no indication to suggest that the other locations have been similarly discovered."

Black looked contemplative, but he didn't ask any more of Snape. He was grateful that Black didn't push the issue, although he wondered why he refrained when it was obvious that he wanted to ask.

Instead, Black turned back to his letter. A glance told Snape that it was to Potter, and he stood rather than comment. He figured that he could pay the same respect to Black that the man had just given him.

He made his way to the cabinet and prodded the wards, testing what was there and adding a few of his own. On the whole, it was well protected.

"What is the password?" Snape asked.

"Huh?" Black turned to see Snape pointing towards the cabinet, "Oh, it's 'Chudley Cannons.'"

At Snape's withering stare he said, "What?"

Snape merely shook his head, but Sirius didn't let it go, "I figured that no one would be mentioning Quidditch teams in here, so no one would inadvertently open it."

He didn't reply, and instead focused once more on the cabinet. Most of his wards were to hide the presence of the ones Black had set, so that if another Death Eater or- he shuddered at the prospect- the Dark Lord came to visit, they would not immediately notice the protection against a seemingly unimportant cabinet.

Content with the shields, he pulled an object out of his pocket and called to Black.

The man turned around, looking at him expectantly. "This is a Portkey. I had the Headmaster make it," a small lie, but he figured Black would feel better that way. "I will leave it with your wand in the cabinet."

Black looked faintly surprised, "You think it'll come to that?"

"Always better to be prepared," Snape said coolly. "Should something happen that would warrant its use, you will be alerted. Hopefully by me. If that is not possible, Oreo may also deliver the message."

Sensing more was coming Sirius asked hesitantly, "And if neither of you can tell me?"

Snape looked down for a moment before continuing softly, "At the very worst you will be alerted if someone attempts to bring down the wards around this room, and then you will take the Portkey to Headquarters."

"You don't really think it'll be that bad, do you?" Sirius asked.

"I don't know!" Snape exclaimed loudly. "The Dark Lord is moving more quickly than we had anticipated- plans are in motion that I have no control over and no information on. My position is tenuous at best, and you will likely be here for an indeterminable time."

Black digested the information silently as Snape continued softly, "Should something happen to my position, the best I can do is ensure that there is a plan to get you back to Headquarters. I may not have the time or ability to return you myself."

Sirius remained silent before finally venturing, "The potion will help, though. Right?"

Snape nodded, "It _might_ help. I need to get the Dark Lord to agree to let me test it on you. Nothing is certain yet."

Black grimaced in remembrance. "At least it didn't taste so bad but I'd rather not have to try out so many untested potions. That one didn't go so well."

Snape smirked, "It wasn't so bad. I enjoyed it."

"Prat," Black said.

It had taken almost two hours to get through the potions and determine which one had the best effect on Black. Snape had been on hand the whole time, running diagnostic spells despite the pain, to eliminate the potions that didn't have the best reactions.

One had almost made Black's heart stop for good, but a simple potion that he had brought with him had fixed it almost immediately. It took some time to convince him to continue, but they found the combination eventually.

Snape would brew extra this weekend to ensure that it would be ready when he needed it.

"So, um," Black began. A withering look from Snape had him spitting it out, "You ok?"

"What?" he asked harshly.

"Last time," he hesitated again. "You didn't do the spells. And I patted you on the shoulder and you freaked."

Snape gnashed his teeth, "I am sufficiently recovered."

Black looked less than convinced, "Yea, sure. Hey, are you gonna tell me what happened at the Order meeting?"

Snape froze, wondering how Black knew about the meeting he had just come from, before his mind supplied him with the obvious information that Black meant the last meeting _he _had attended before being captured.

He also remembered that Black had asked him previously what happened to cause his injury that night.

Choosing to ignore him for the moment, he pocketed his wand and turned to the door, "I will most likely return after my meeting. I am not sure how long it will be."

He walked calmly through the halls, giving a curt nod to those who saw him and greeted him. As a member of the Inner Circle, no matter how the Dark Lord felt about him, he was due a certain amount of respect from the lower members.

The Dark Lord was most likely in the central hold; it was where the meetings were usually held and where most business was conducted. There was a good chance that there were others there.

He gave a mental snort. Headquarters was usually crawling with Death Eaters at any given time during the day. Some of them attended to the upkeep of the castle- which, from his best guess, was an old magic school that had been abandoned- and many were there to serve the Dark Lord directly.

His orders had to be delivered, after all.

But others, like the Lestranges, were there because they had nowhere else to be. As convicted felons, their family home had been raided and seized. It had taken Lucius quite a bit of time after the Dark Lord's apparent defeat just to get himself out of hot water.

He had managed to push the Ministry into letting the ancestral homes of the Death Eaters go. They belonged to the bloodlines and the Ministry had removed what they wanted years ago.

Eventually they had turned the houses over to Lucius's care, and with the recent outbreak from Azkaban, he returned them to their owners.

It was a messy business, and the Ministry and the Aurors have been keeping tabs on the comings and goings in the house. Not that they could do much with the protections and the wards that were reactivated upon each master's return.

So many Death Eaters remained in Headquarters while their families stayed in the smaller family estates and went between the two.

He entered the hold with an air of cool confidence; his stride long and powerful and he noted with a pleased smirk that there was no one of real importance there to deny him an audience with the Dark Lord.

"My Lord," Severus began carefully, trying to gauge the Dark Lord's mood. "I humbly request a moment of your time, alone."

That certainly got his attention. The Dark wizard smiled predatorily, "Of course, Severus. Leave us at once," he commanded the rest of the room.

The handful of Death Eaters left the room quickly, although several of them threw a curious or calculating glance back at the pair. Once the doors had shut Snape remained silent, waiting for Voldemort to ask him why he wanted this time.

After several moments the Dark Lord spoke, "I was wondering how long it would take you, dear Severus, to approach me."

Taking his cue, Snape knelt and bowed his head, "I have been unobservant to your wishes, My Lord, and I beg your forgiveness."

Waving his hand idly, Voldemort said, "Rise, Severus, and tell me; why are you here?"

Snape nodded and lifted his head, although he remained kneeling, "My Lord, I have tried in vain for the last two weeks to manipulate Dumbledore into giving me access to the mental barriers that the Order uses. I myself have not been included in these shields and cannot access them through my limited Legilimency skillsand Dumbledore has repeatedly denied my requests."

Snape paused, waiting to see what Voldemort would do, but the reptilian-like man did nothing, so Snape continued. "I continued to push the topic, but I feared that Dumbledore began to suspect something so I was forced to cease my efforts. It occurred to me at that point, My Lord, that Black is utterly useless without the key to the shields. I do not think Dumbledore will ever trust me with it, and if the secrets being kept in Black's head are inaccessible, he is much better off to us as a corpse than a prisoner."

Voldemort looked thoughtful, "Prisoners are always useful, Severus. I understand you wish to exact revenge upon him for his slights against you at school, but there is a bigger picture here, my loyal Death Eater."

"Of course, My Lord. I did not speak from a wish for revenge, although the bonus has weighed heavily on my mind," Snape flashed a smirk of his own, secretly extremely pleased at how this was going. "But to my knowledge, Potter has not been told of Black's capture and Dumbledore is doing everything in his power to spare the boy. It is unlikely that he'll chase after Black, and there's no chance that he'll be rescued when the pathetic Order doesn't even know where Black is being kept. So the only way to cause them pain is to deliver his body to them."

Voldemort smiled again, "I agree. Although I did not think it would take you this long, Severus." Something similar to a disapproving look was directed his way and Snape bowed his head once more.

"I did not expect the old fool to allow you access to his shields, although you would have been rewarded if you had gained the key. Black was never meant for any greater purpose other than death. However, he is a powerful bargaining chip. I will not toss him away so soon. You will have one month, Severus. Press the advantage."

"Of course, My Lord. I shall endeavor to determine what Black is worth to Dumbledore," Snape agreed.

Voldemort nodded, "Good. He is important to Potter, but not irreplaceable to Dumbledore. If he stalls, hoping for a rescue, we will kill Black and send his body back."

"My Lord," Snape hedged.

"Another thought, Severus?"

"Yes, My Lord," Snape was laying it on now; the only chance Black had depended on this moment. "If you will allow it, I have been working on a potion for some time now, hoping to find a reason to use it, and with if his death becomes assured, I would be honored if you allowed me to test it on Black and complete my revenge."

Voldemort gave a laugh, "Indeed, have you prepared something? I am sure you've cultivated this idea for sometime, haven't you?" Snape nodded again.

"And what will it do?" Voldemort seemed genuinely curious, as he always was with a new potion or spell.

"It has taken me so long to complete because it is highly unstable and volatile; the ingredients are rare and expensive. It takes a full two months to brew," he began; lying to introduce the potion in a way that would limit how often Voldemort would ask for it.

"But in the tests up until now it has shown the ability to mimic the Cruciatus Curse."

Voldemort's face showed his shock and glee for only a moment before vanishing, "Most impressive, dear boy. I am sure the results of the potion far outweigh any problems with brewing it."

Snape nodded in agreement, although he was wary of the interest Voldemort showed in the potion already. He knew it would be tempting for the Dark Lord, since the Curse was a favorite of his, and the chance to inflict that pain without actually exerting the magic himself was almost a dream come true.

"I have been unable to secure a human test subject yet, but every test I have run to this point suggests that the potion will ensure that the object will suffer almost seven minutes under the same conditions as the Cruciatus Curse before finally succumbing to the pain. If My Lord permits it, I would like to test it on Black."

"Of course, Severus. I could not deny you this chance after your faithful service."

Satisfied that it was the best possible outcome under the circumstances, Snape bowed again, "My Lord is too kind. It is an honor to serve."

Voldemort nodded and Snape withdrew carefully, not turning his back on the Dark Lord until he was well clear of him. He walked back to his room, thinking hard.

_One month. I will take this back to Dumbledore, but there isn't much that he can offer in exchange for Black. Few Death Eaters that the Dark Lord actually cares about have been captured, and Dumbledore knows that he wouldn't actually exchange Black for anyone less than a member of the Inner Circle._

_Even that isn't a sure thing. The Dark Lord was never fond of prisoner exchanges. Most likely he just wants to make Dumbledore sweat a bit before he kills Black. _

He was interrupted by a squeak, "S-Severus." He didn't hold back a sigh as he saw who it was.

"What Pettigrew? I have several matters to attend to and all are much more pressing than anything you could possibly have to say," it was rewarding to see the rat flinch at his tone.

"Did the D-Dark Lord mention my mission at all?" He asked, looking around warily.

Snape wondered for the millionth time how Pettigrew had managed to betray the Potters and not give himself away before hand. The thought struck something in him, but he pushed it aside for future consideration.

"No, and I highly doubt that it is _me_ you should be talking to," he sneered. "You should consult the Dark Lord for his orders."

"But Severus," he whined. "They know my Animagus form. They'll catch me." He seemed terrified.

Snape took no pity on him, "Then you have two options. Defy the Dark Lord," Pettigrew looked like he would fall over at the thought. "Or pray that your previous friends in the Order are merciful."

With a swish of his cloak, he left the man standing there trembling. He quickly descended the stairs and turned the corner to his room. Snape whispered the password and unlocked the intruder ward before entering quickly and resetting the ward.

He turned to find Black directly in front of him and he involuntarily flinched back.

"How'd it go?" he asked nervously.

"Dreadful," Snape answered. "He's actually only right behind me. He decided to kill you himself."

"What!" Black looked around, panicked, his hands coming up to tear at his hair.

"For a Marauder," Snape observed idly. "You certainly don't take a joke very well."

The panic bled from his face to be replaced with bewilderment and anger. He shoved Snape back, "You bastard. You don't joke about shit like that."

"Obviously _you_ don't," Snape said, brushing off his shoulders. "But I'll take my humor where I can get it."

Another look from Black and Snape decided to indulge him, "It actually went much better than I thought."

Black perked up at that, "Really?"

Snape nodded, "The Dark Lord has given me one month to see what I can get the Headmaster to exchange for you. He knows that Dumbledore won't exchange anything, he has nothing of real value to the Dark Lord, and besides-"

"Voldemort doesn't do prisoner exchanges," Black finished. "I remember. So why a month?"

"To make Albus and the rest of the Order sweat a little. As long as you remain his prisoner he has an advantage, even if it's only psychological," Snape rubbed a hand over his brow. "After the month is up, he will summon me and he has given me permission to use the potion to kill you."

"That's great then, isn't it?" Black looked uncertain but happy.

Snape nodded again, allowing Black some hope, "It was the best we could outcome we could get under the circumstances. Now the only thing is ensuring that nothing happens in the next month that would ruin this."

Seeing the problem, Black frowned, "A month is a long time. A lot can happen." He gave a smile, though, "But we're in a better position than we had hoped. And you have a plan. Thank you, Snape. I really mean that."

Snape just rolled his eyes, but Sirius continued, "So can you be straight with me now?"

"Why does it matter?" Snape asked.

"It just, I dunno," he shrugged. "It just does."

He shook his head, "Not good enough." He removed his Portkey again. "I'll be back in a couple of days."

He activated the Portkey before Black could argue, and went through his rooms to his potions lab, setting up the cauldrons and ingredients necessary for another dose of Black's potion.

The full moon was Sunday and he planned to stay at Hogwarts in case he was needed. To his knowledge Lupin had been taking the potion everyday this week, but he took no chances when it came to something like that.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Dolohov approached the Dark Lord, "You asked for me, My Lord?" He did not bow, and Voldemort didn't ask him to. Dolohov's father was one of Voldemort's first followers. He was his first trusted advisor.

As such, he was given some leniency, but his own talents had distinguished himself early in his own service to the Dark Lord.

"I have found two tasks to which your expertise is required," Dolohov didn't interrupt. "You will be responsible for both and I leave the planning entirely to you."

Dolohov raised an eyebrow at that; it was rare for the Dark Lord to give a mission over completely to one of his Death Eaters; even to one of his Inner Circle.

"You honor me, My Lord. I promise you that I will not fail," he offered a small bow, not willing to push his luck.

"I trust that you will complete these in a timely manner. They are of the utmost importance." A deferential nod, and then Voldemort continued.

"First, you are to bring Rita Skeeter to me," he instructed.

Dolohov's surprise showed on his face and he couldn't help but ask, "The reporter?"

"Yes. She has certain _talents_ that I wish to employ," he smirked. "And I am sure she will be willing to oblige me. She is of particular importance and I do not want her disappearance to be noticed."

Dolohov gave an understanding nod, "And the other task?"

A full smile from the Dark Lord had Dolohov checking his instincts to run away.

"Bring me Frank and Alice Longbottom."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Whoa. Betcha didn't see that one coming.

Tried to give you some more action because I know the last chapter was a drag. Little short, but I'm working on it.

It might be a little slow for a while. I have ideas for the next couple of chapters and I have the chapter where Sirius's fate is decided, but it'll be a pain to get to that point.

Thanks for sticking with me.

This is a video I found the other day. Just for funsies. (remove the spaces)

http:/ /watch?v= 3lVdAgVDtHI&feature=related

Always,

Sinkme


End file.
